Your daily dose of WHATEVER!
Is Kristen Stewart Losing Her Hair Because of Stress Over Her Breakup With Robert Pattinson?
Sources say that KRISTEN STEWART’S breakup with ROBERT PATTINSON is still causing her so much stress that she’s LOSING HAIR. Friends are begging Rob to pay her a visit in Germany, where she’s filming a movie. But he REFUSES, because as far as he’s concerned, the relationship is over.
Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher Got Together . . . In the Name of Charity
ASHTON KUTCHER and DEMI MOORE were spotted together at the airport in Burbank . . . but it was all about business.
They had both attended a conference in San Jose on behalf of their charity . . . which works to combat things like sex trafficking and child pornography. And they ended up on the same flight back home
Jay Leno Reminded Sharon Osbourne That They Have Two of the Longest Marriages in Hollywood
After SHARON OSBOURNE admitted to her fling with JAY LENO on “The Talk” Monday, Jay got in touch.
On yesterday’s show, Sharon said, quote, “As soon as the show was finished he called me. He said, ‘Isn’t it amazing that . . . we were both single and we both found our love of our lives and we both got the longest marriages in Hollywood?'”
Mario Lopez is a Dad Again
MARIO LOPEZ is a dad again. His wife Courtney gave birth to a baby boy Monday night.
He Tweeted, quote, “It’s a boy!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Please welcome Dominic Lopez to the world. Couldn’t be happier . . . Courtney and baby are doing just fine.”
Maya Rudolph Gave Birth to Her Fourth Child
MAYA RUDOLPH gave birth to her fourth child . . . but there’s no word when. We also don’t know the name or even the gender of the kid.
Maya and her husband, director PAUL THOMAS ANDERSON, already have two daughters, ages 7 and 3, and a 2-year-old son.
Sydney Leathers Showed Up at Anthony Weiner’s Campaign Party . . . With New Boobs
ANTHONY WEINER lost the Democratic primary for New York City mayor last night. And SYDNEY LEATHERS crashed his election night campaign party with brand new boobs. ELIOT SPITZER also failed in his bid to become comptroller.
Oprah Winfrey Fears . . . Balloons
The October issue of “O” magazine is all about facing your fears . . . so Oprah revealed that she’s afraid of BALLOONS. (???) She says, quote, “It reminds me of gunfire [when they pop]. It really freaks me out.”
Tom Hanks is On Jury Duty
Even when celebrities are contacted for jury duty, they’re rarely picked. But TOM HANKS is doing his duty as we speak . . . sitting on the jury in the case of a man accused of domestic violence. The case started yesterday.
Lamar Odom Says He Doesn’t Have a Drug Problem and Hopes He’ll Be in the NBA This Season
The paparazzi caught LAMAR ODOM leaving a sushi place the other night. He said he’s doing okay, he doesn’t have a drug problem, he doesn’t need professional help and he hopes to play ball this coming season.
A Cop Let Nicki Minaj Out of a Ticket . . . So She Wrote a Note to the Cop’s Daughter
One of the coolest things about being a celebrity has to be how much easier it is to avoid TICKETS. NICKI MINAJ was almost ticketed by a female traffic cop recently, until the woman realized who she was.
Apparently, the cop’s daughter is a huge Nicki fan . . . so she let her off. And to show her gratitude, Nicki wrote the cop’s daughter a note saying, quote, “You and your mom are amazing!”
The Return of NFL Football Took The Top Three Spots in the TV Ratings
The NFL dominated the weekly TV rankings, taking eight of the top ten spots. Fox actual beat NBC’s “Sunday Night Football” with their doubleheader “NFL on Fox” coverage of the both the 49ers–Packers game and the Rams–Cardinals game.
In fact, “NFL on Fox” shattered Fox’s previous game records, with 28.5 million people tuning in to watch QB Colin Kaepernick score three touchdowns and throw for 412 yards as he led the 49ers to a 34-28 victory over the Packers.
(You can watch Kaepernick make a bet with Seattle QB Russell Wilson here. Whoever loses next weekend’s game has to SHAVE ONE EYEBROW.)
The matchup between the Cowboys and the Giants drew 25.4 million viewers in second place. And Thursday’s season opener between the Broncos and the Ravens was the highest rated Thursday program this year. Here are last week’s Top 10 shows . . .
1. “NFL on Fox: Green Bay at San Francisco”, Fox, 28.5 million viewers.
The 49ers beat the Packers, 34-28.
2. “Sunday Night Football: New York at Dallas”, NBC, 25.4 million viewers.
The Cowboys beat the Giants, 36-31.
3. “NFL Season Opener: Baltimore at Denver”, NBC, 25.1 million viewers. The Broncos thrashed the Super Bowl champs, 49-27, thanks to Peyton Manning’s record-tying performance. He threw seven touchdown passes.
4. “Sunday Night NFL Pre-kick”, NBC, 19.3 million viewers.
5. The “Pre-Kick” for Thursday’s season opener, NBC, 18 million viewers.
6. “The OT”, Fox, 17.6 million viewers.
7. “Football Night in America”, NBC, 14.1 million viewers.
8. “Under the Dome”, CBS, 11.2 million viewers.
9. “Duck Dynasty”, A&E, 10.5 million viewers
10. “NFL Kick-off 2013″, NBC, 10.1 million viewers. This was the party before the season opener. You can watch two videos of Keith Urban’s performances here.
(And you can revisit Carrie Underwood singing the new “Sunday Night Football” theme . . . and compare it to Faith Hill’s old version . . . here.)
Here are some additional ratings that may interest you:
• “America’s Got Talent” pulled in 10 million viewers for the results show and 9.2 million for the performance show.
• The 36th season premiere of “20/20″ attracted 4.8 million viewers.
• The 3rd season finale of ABC’s “Secret Millionaire” drew 4.3 million viewers
• “The Comedy Central Roast of James Franco” got 3.1 million viewers. That’s way more than Roseanne had in her roast last year, but nowhere near the 6.4 million who tuned in for the Charlie Sheen’s roast.
• The 4th season premiere of “Boardwalk Empire” attracted 2.4 million viewers.
• The series finale of “Futurama” had 2.2 million viewers
• The 4th season finale of “Hot in Cleveland” . . . featuring the reunion of Betty White with her “Mary Tyler Moore” costars Cloris Leachman, Mary Tyler Moore, and cancer survivor Valerie Harper . . . drew 1.9 million viewers.
• The 5th season premiere of “The League” attracted 790,000 viewers.
• The 9th season premiere of “It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia” got 760,000.
Wednesday TV Reminders:
• “The X Factor” [3rd Season Premiere] . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on Fox. Simon Cowell and Demi Lovato are back as the returning judges and they’ll be joined by new judges Kelly Rowland and pop star Paulina Rubio.
• “Big Brother 15″ [Power of Veto competition] . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on CBS.
• “9/11 Firehouse” [Special] . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on Discovery. New York City firefighters recall the events of 9/11.
• “Life After” [5th Season Premiere] . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on TV One. Sheryl Lee Ralph is profiled.
• “America’s Got Talent” [Results Show] . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on NBC. Ventriloquist Terry Fator and Olate Dogs perform. They’re both former “AGT” winners.
• “MasterChef” [4th Season Finale] . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on Fox.
• “Royal Pains” [5th Season Finale] . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on USA.
• “Spell-Mageddon” [1st Season Finale] . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on ABC Family.
• “The Presidents’ Gatekeepers” [Two Part Special] . . . 9:00 to 11:00 P.M. on Discovery. A two-night event narrated by Kevin Bacon profiling previously untold stories shared by 20 living White House chiefs of staff.
• “Here Comes Honey Boo Boo” [2nd Season Finale] . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on TLC.
• “Verses & Flow” [3rd Season Premiere] . . . 9:00 to 9:30 P.M. on TV One. Miles Hodges, Jill Scott, B.J. the Chicago Kid, slam poets Carvens Lissaint and Storm Thomas perform.
• “Camp” [1st Season Finale] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on NBC.
• “Patrick Dempsey: Racing Le Mans” [Part 3 of 4] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on Velocity.
• “Too Young To Marry?” [Series Premiere] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on Oxygen. A reality show about young teen couples getting ready to tie the knot.
• “Watch What Happens: Live” . . . 11:00 to 11:30 P.M. on Bravo. Lady Gaga guests.
• “Totally Biased with W. Kamau Bell” . . . 11:00 to 11:30 P.M. on FXX. Laverne Cox (“Orange Is the New Black”) guests.
Early Morning Show Guests:
• “The Today Show” – Author Bill Dedman (“Empty Mansions: The Mysterious Life of Huguette Clark and the Spending of a Great American Fortune”).
• “Good Morning America” – Michelle Pfeiffer (“The Family”), Jenny McCarthy, and former “Heroes” star Ali Larter for her new cookbook “Kitchen Revelry: A Year of Festive Menus from My Home to Yours”.
• “CBS This Morning” – Michael C. Hall (“Dexter”), former Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice and NASCAR driver Dale Earnhardt Jr.
Mid-Morning Show Guests:
• “Live! With Kelly and Michael” – Michelle Pfeiffer (“The Family”) and Rachael Ray (“Rachael vs. Guy: Kids Cook-Off”).
• “The View” – Music Guest: Keith Urban.
• “Rachael Ray” – Rachael discusses treatments for women’s hair loss and HGTV’s John Gidding offers fixes for home-design dilemmas.
This Afternoon On TV:
• “Ellen DeGeneres” – Céline Dion, plus thirteen-year-old YouTube hit Sam Horowitz (a.k.a. the Bar Mitzvah boy).
• “The Talk” – Craig Ferguson, plus Meatball Shop owners Daniel Holzman and Michael Chernow.
• “Katie Couric” – Cedric the Entertainer (“The Soul Man”), plus Taylor Schilling and Jason Biggs are joined by the women who inspired their Netflix series “Orange Is the New Black”. Music Guest: Eve.
• “Steve Harvey” – Steve reveals how he and his staff come up with ideas for the show, shares his most memorable moments, and shares how he gets to work.
• “Dr. Phil” – “Love Scams: Courted by a Catfish?” A private investigator checks up on two men who are engaged to two women they’ve never met in person.
• “Dr. Oz Show” – Kim Coles, Cheryl Burke (“Dancing with the Stars”) and Kandi Burruss (“The Real Housewives of Atlanta”) discuss mood swings.
• “Wendy Williams” – LeAnn Rimes. (REPEAT)
• “Bethenny” – Gilles Marini (“Switched at Birth”).
• “Letterman” – Joseph Gordon-Levitt (“Don Jon”) and Keith Olbermann (ESPN2’s “Olbermann”). Music Guest: Keith Urban.
• “Jimmy Kimmel” – Tim Gunn (“Project Runway”). Music Guest: Preservation Hall Jazz Band.
• “The Tonight Show” – Charlie Sheen (“Anger Management”) and radio personality Jim Rome. Music Guest: Trombone Shorty.
• “Craig Ferguson” – Amy Smart (“7500”) and Max Greenfield (“New Girl”).
• “Jimmy Fallon” – Ricky Gervais (“Derek”) and Michael Shannon (“Boardwalk Empire”). Music Guest: MGMT.
• “Carson Daly” – Author Sebastian Junger (“WAR”) and Motocross racer Monster Mike Schultz. Music Guest: Joshua James. (REPEAT)
• “Conan” – Rose Byrne (“Insidious: Chapter 2″). Music Guest: Gov’t Mule.
• “Jon Stewart” – Comedians Bob Odenkirk and David Cross.
• “The Colbert Report” – Music Guest: Sheryl Crow.
• “Chelsea Lately” – Swimmer Diana Nyad, the first person to swim the 110-mile Florida Strait.
• “Arsenio” – Magic Johnson and George Lopez. Music Guest: rapper Nas.
Science Proves Men With Smaller Testes Are Better Fathers
According to a new study, the smaller the testicles, the better the father. They think it’s because of evolution . . . people have limited energy to divide between mating and parenting. Since men with large gonads are more fertile, their instinct is to focus more on knocking women up.
A Fake Dominatrix Gets Male Clients to Come to Her Farm for Punishment . . . and Makes Them Do Farm Work in Fetish Masks?
Last year, a 35-year-old DOMINATRIX in Austria posted an ad looking for men to come to her farm for DISCIPLINE and PUNISHMENT. Three men paid to go . . . but she just made them do farm work in fetish masks. But after a week of just doing farm work with no erotic punishment, the guys realized it was a scam. Prosecutors are looking into whether she did something illegal.
A Golf Course Apologized for Offering a $9.11 Golf Special on 9/11
We all let Memorial Day become about mattress specials . . . but we can’t let that happen to 9/11. So a golf course in Wisconsin has apologized for offering a September 11th golf special . . . nine holes of golf for $9.11. They said the goal was to remind people of the SIGNIFICANCE of 9/11. Now they’re donating the profits today to a 9/11 memorial fund.
It Finally Happened: A Guy Called the Cops on Someone for Using Their Cell Phone in a Movie Theater
On Monday, a writer wanted to stop a guy from using his cell phone in a movie theater during a film festival. But the theater manager and the film festival told him there was nothing they could do. So he CALLED THE COPS. But obviously it’s not ILLEGAL to use your phone in a theater, so the writer apologized for overreacting.
A Mom Makes Her Daughter Hold Up a Sign in Public Apologizing for Twerking at a School Dance
On Monday, a woman in California found out her 11-year-old, seventh grade daughter had been TWERKING at a school dance. So she made her daughter stand on a corner, holding up a sign that said, quote, “I was disrespecting my parents by twerking at my school dance.”
Tyler Hoechlin – 26 (Derek Hale on “Teen Wolf”. He was also Gerry in “Hall Pass”, but way before he got cool he was Martin on “Seventh Heaven”.)
Charles Kelley – 32 (Lady Antebellum singer. His older brother Josh Kelley is also a singer. Charles has a Grammy. But Josh gets to nail Katherine Heigl.)
Ludacris – 36
Taraji P. Henson – 43 (Detective Carter on “Person of Interest”. She also played Jaden Smith’s mom in the “Karate Kid” remake. But you might know and love her for posing nude in one of those “I’d rather go naked” PETA ads.)
Harry Connick, Jr. – 46 (Your newest “American Idol” judge. Nails former Victoria’s Secret supermodel Jill Goodacre.)
Moby – 48
Virginia Madsen – 52 (Was the blonde MILF on ABC’s “Scoundrels” . . . and the non-Asiatic minx in “Sideways”. Plus, she fought the “Candyman”. She’s also Michael Madsen’s sister . . . and he refuses to see any of her movies if she has naughty nude scenes in them.)
KRISTY MCNICHOL! – 51 (ANDROGYNOUS BIPOLAR GODDESS!)
Mick Talbot – 55 (The Style Council! Biggest Hit: 1984’s “My Ever Changing Moods”! Mick was also a member of Dexy’s Midnight Runners, a band with a no-drugs policy that had gotten its name from a party drug, the stimulant Dexedrine.)
Jon Moss – 56 (Culture Club drummer and Boy George’s try-sexual ex-boyfriend.)
Tommy Shaw – 60 (Spinner guitarist in Styx!)
Amy Madigan – 63 (Kevin Costner’s wife in “Field Of Dreams”. Ed Harris nails her.)
Mickey Hart – 70 (Grateful Dead drummer.)
Brian De Palma – 73 (Director of way too many awesome movies to name . . . including the original “Sisters”, “Carrie”, “Dressed to Kill”, “Mission Impossible”, “Carlito’s Way”, “The Untouchables”, “Wiseguys” and “Scarface”.)
Countdown to Upcoming Events
• 5 days to “Dancing with the Stars”
• 8 days to Talk Like a Pirate Day
• 16 days to Native American Day
• 35 days until Boss’s Day
• 50 days until Halloween
• 1,227 days left of “Hope and Change”
Back In The Day…
12 years ago . . . in 2001 – At 8:46 A.M. and 9:03 A.M., two hijacked planes were crashed into the WORLD TRADE CENTER. Two other suicide flights crashed at the Pentagon and in the woods of Pennsylvania.
A total of 2,792 people died in the World Trade Center attacks; 184 innocent people died in the Pentagon attack (including those on the plane), and 40 died in the plane that crashed in Pennsylvania.
166 years ago . . . in 1847 – “Oh, Susannah” was sung for the first time in public. It was written by Stephen Foster, a TRUE CRACKER. He was from Pittsburgh, and visited the South ONE TIME . . . but wrote “Oh, Susannah” AND “Camptown Races”.
59 years ago . . . in 1954 – THE MISS AMERICA PAGEANT made its network TV debut. Miss California, LEE ANN MERIWETHER, was crowned the winner.
(Lee Meriwether later played Catwoman in the 1966 movie version of the old-school “Batman” TV series, starring the one TRUE Batman, the incomparable ADAM WEST.)
(JULIE NEWMAR, who’d played Catwoman on the show, was already obligated to film “Mackenna’s Gold”, so she had to bow out.)
42 years ago . . . in 1971 – The “Tito Jackson & The Jackson 5″ cartoon show debuted on ABC . . . featuring the Jacksons and their pets: Two rats named Ray and Charles and a snake named Rosie the Crusher. (???)
39 years ago . . . in 1974 – “Little House On The Prairie” debuted on TV, starring MICHAEL LANDON and MELISSA GILBERT. (Melissa played “Half-Pint”, but now she’s got TWO GALLON JUGS. Paw would be proud.) (???)
32 years ago . . . in 1981 – NANCY REAGAN said, “The White House really badly, badly needs china.” So she went out and spent 200,000 of our tax dollars on new dishes.
28 years ago . . . in 1985 – PETE ROSE broke TY COBB’S career record with his 4,192nd base hit . . . off Eric Show of the San Diego Padres.
(Yet the only hall of fame he could get into was the WWE Hall of Fame . . . and he had to dress up in a chicken costume and get PILE-DRIVEN by Kane to get in. WHERE IS THE JUSTICE???)
26 years ago . . . in 1987 – While a tennis tournament ran overtime, DAN RATHER stormed off the set of the “CBS Evening News”. The tennis coverage ended, and Rather was nowhere to be found . . . so the network went black for SIX MINUTES.
26 years ago . . . in 1987 – LORNE GREENE, star of “Bonanza”, “Battlestar Galactica” and a bunch of Alpo dog food commercials, passed away from pneumonia at the age of 72.
19 years ago . . . in 1994 – JESSICA TANDY died of ovarian cancer at the age of 85.
11 years ago . . . in 2002 – NICK NOLTE was arrested on suspicion of drunken driving. It seems he was on the DATE-RAPE DRUG. (???) (Here’s another look at his sexy mugshot.) (The Smoking Gun)
11 years ago . . . in 2002 – KIM HUNTER, who played sexy chimpanzee Dr. Zira in the first three (old-school) “Planet Of The Apes” movies, died of a heart attack. She was 79.
(In addition to her work in “Planet Of The Apes”, Hunter won a Best Supporting Actress Oscar for her role as Stella opposite MARLON BRANDO in “A Streetcar Named Desire”.)
11 years ago . . . in 2002 – Legendary Baltimore Colts quarterback JOHNNY UNITAS died of a heart attack at 69.
10 years ago . . . in 2003 – “Three’s Company” superstar JOHN RITTER died suddenly and unexpectedly of a previously undetected heart ailment called an AORTIC DISSECTION, after collapsing on the set of his ABC sitcom, “8 Simple Rules for Dating My Teenage Daughter”. He was only 54.