Whatever 8.8

Your daily dose of WHATEVER!

Intentionally Funny Male Full-Frontal Movie Scenes

Buzzfeed.com has put together a list of 18 Intentionally Funny Male Full-Frontal Movie Scenes. They include Jason Segel from "Forgetting Sarah Marshall", Robin Williams in "The Fisher King" and Ken Jeong in "The Hangover".

1. Bart Simpson in "The Simpsons Movie"

2. Ben Stiller in "There's Something About Mary"

3. The giant devil in "This Is the End"

4. Saddam Hussein in "South Park: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut"

5. M.C. Gainey in "Sideways" (REAL PEEN!)

6. Amir Talai in "Harold & Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay" (REAL PEEN!)

7. Sacha Baron Cohen and Ken Davitian in "Borat" (This is from the infamous NUDE FIGHT SCENE. And there are flashes of REAL PEEN . . . but only from Ken.)

8. Robin Williams in "The Fisher King" (REAL PEEN!)

9. The streaker in "Observe and Report" (REAL PEEN!)

10. Jerry O'Connell in "Piranha" (Fake peen . . . but it does get ripped off and eaten by piranha.)

11. Ken Jeong in "The Hangover" (REAL PEEN!)

12. Joe Lo Truglio in "Wanderlust"

13. The Killer in "Scary Movie"

14. Graham Norton in "Another Gay Movie"

15. Jason Mewes in "Zack and Miri Make a Porno" (REAL PEEN!)

16. Jason "Wee Man" Acuna in "Jackass Number Two" (REAL PEEN!)

17. Jason Biggs in "American Reunion" (REAL PEEN!)

18. Jason Segel in "Forgetting Sarah Marshall" (REAL PEEN!)

Angelina Jolie is Not on a List of Hollywood's Top 5 Perfect and Filler-Free Lips

A website made a list of Hollywood's Top 5 Perfect and Filler-Free Lips. They chose Gina Torres, Jennifer Hudson, Ellen Page, Rosario Dawson and Alicia Silverstone. I guess they don't believe Angelina Jolie's pout is legit.

1. Gina Torres (She's on the USA Network series "Suits".)

2. Jennifer Hudson

3. Ellen Page

4. Rosario Dawson

5. Alicia Silverstone

Celebrity Hero of the Day: John Stamos Is Taking a Woman Who Lost All Her Limbs to Disneyland

JOHN STAMOS is taking a 19-year-old woman who lost all her limbs to a bacterial infection to Disneyland. John posted a picture of himself at the hospital bedside of Kaitlyn Dobrow, along with a message that said, quote, "I'm ONLY doing this 'cause they asked. I said no press. But this story is a must read -- plus me and katie have a date to Disneyland."

Someone Stole James Gandolfini's Rolex on the Day He Died

Someone stole JAMES GANDOLFINI'S $3,000 Rolex watch from his hotel room in Rome on the day he died last month.

It's believed it was taken during all the commotion that was taking place when he had his fatal heart attack, but so far there aren't any suspects.

A Fan Thought Mark Wahlberg Was Matt Damon . . . And He Didn't Correct Her

A woman saw MARK WAHLBERG on the street, screamed "MATT DAMON!" and asked for a picture. So Mark took a picture with her and her friend, and didn't even bother to correct her.

The woman later found out it was Mark, not Matt, so she posted the picture online and said, quote, "He didn't correct us at all. Lmao."

Did Lindsay Lohan Chase Chaka Khan Out of Rehab?

LINDSAY LOHAN was in rehab with singer CHAKA KHAN . . . but Chaka was so annoyed by Lindsay's antics that she left a week early just to get away from her. A source says, quote, "Lindsay was just doing stupid stuff for attention, so Chaka told her she was childish and told her to grow up. She started yelling at Lindsay. Told her to knock it off, asking her if she came to rehab to get well, or just to piss around."

Usher Gave Props to the Two "Heroes" Who Saved His Sons

USHER'S son USHER RAYMOND THE FIFTH is recovering after almost drowning on Monday. And Usher issued a statement yesterday thanking his aunt who was on the scene, the two men who rescued the boy from the pool and the doctors and nurses who are caring for him.

Batman is the Most Popular Superhero on YouTube, Followed by Thor

Batman is the most popular superhero on YouTube. He's got 3 BILLION views. He's followed by Thor with 2.1 billion views, and Superman with 1.7 billion. Rounding out the Top 5 are Iron Man with 1.4 billion, and The Avengers with an even billion.

Batman, 3 billion views, 71,000 hours

Thor, 2.1 billion views, 66,000 hours

Superman, 1.7 billion views, 14,000 hours

Iron Man, 1.4 billion views, 20,000 hours

The Avengers, 1 billion views, 31,000 hours

Wolverine, 540 million views, 7,800 hours

Spider-Man, 340 million views, 7,400 hours

Captain America, 280 million views, 4,900 hours

The Justice League, 220 million views, 3,200 hours

Deadpool, 200 million views, 8,900 hours

Enough Already: Some Guy on "Big Brother" "Joked" About Being Into Child Pornography

Spencer Clawson . . . the bearded, red-headed guy on "Big Brother" . . . was caught "joking" about liking to pleasure himself to child pornography on the show's live Internet feed. He added, quote, "My favorite ones are when you can tell they're in a basement." Enough already. This show needs to END.

Amber Tamblyn Will Play the Bisexual Daughter on "Two and a Half Men"

AMBER TAMBLYN has joined the cast of "Two and a Half Men". She will be playing the bisexual daughter of CHARLIE SHEEN'S character . . . who's basically taking the place of ANGUS T. JONES.

Catch Up with "Breaking Bad" in One Eight-Minute Video

The final season of AMC's "Breaking Bad" begins this Sunday. Although technically, this is just the second half of Season Five. The first eight episodes of the season aired last summer, and there are eight episodes left.

If you want to join the bandwagon now, but don't want to blaze through the previous 54 episodes first . . . good news: There's a video online where two dudes will get you caught up on everything that has happened in EIGHT MINUTES.

(Here's the video.)

Thursday TV Reminders:

• "PGA Championship" [First-round] . . . 1:00 to 7:00 P.M. Eastern on TNT.

• "Monday Night Pre-Season Football" . . . 8:00 to 11:00 P.M. Eastern on ESPN. The Atlanta Falcons host the Cincinnati Bengals at the Georgia Dome in Atlanta.

• "The Winner Is…" [1st Season Finale] . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on NBC.

• "Project Runway" . . . 9:00 to 10:30 P.M. on Lifetime. Jesse Tyler Ferguson from "Modern Family" is a guest judge.

• "Hollywood Game Night" . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on NBC. Niecy Nash, Josh Gad, Jason Alexander, Nick Cannon, Al Roker and Will Sasso are this week's celebrities.

• "Vanessa & Ashley: Inner Circle" . . . 10:00 to 10:30 P.M. on E! Ashley Tisdale interviews Vanessa Hudgens regarding work and relationships.

• "Later... With Jools Holland" . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. Eastern on Palladia. Bloc Party, Jakob Dylan, Keane, Amadou & Mariam, and Allen Toussaint perform, plus an interview with Dave Clark.

• "Panic 9-1-1" [2nd Season Premiere] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on A&E.

• "Watch What Happens: Live" . . . 11:00 to 11:30 P.M. on Bravo. Taylor Schilling ("Orange Is the New Black") and Hank Azaria ("The Smurfs 2").

Early Morning Show Guests:

• "The Today Show" - Lake Bell ("In a World…") and chef Giada De Laurentiis. Music Guest: K.T. Tunstall.

• "Good Morning America" - Lenny Kravitz ("The Butler"), Josh Gad ("Jobs"), Christie Brinkley and her daughter, plus the cast of "Property Brothers".

• "CBS This Morning" - No guests listed yet. Check your local listings.

Mid-Morning Show Guests:

• "Live! With Kelly and Michael" - Lenny Kravitz ("The Butler"). Nicole Richie co-hosts with Michael.

• "The View" - Mayim Bialik ("The Big Bang Theory") and Anson Mount (Cullen Bohannan on "Hell on Wheels"). Marysol Castro co-hosts.

• "Rachael Ray" - Genie Francis and diet expert Dr. Ian Smith. (REPEAT)

• "Kris" - Tom Bergeron ("Dancing with the Stars") co-hosts.

This Afternoon On TV:

• "Ellen DeGeneres" - Rihanna and a performance by the Blue Man Group. (REPEAT)

• "The Talk" - Director Penny Marshall and fashion expert Sam Saboura. Music Guest: Steve Tyrell. Regis Philbin and Carnie Wilson co-host.

• "The Real" - Bethenny Frankel ("Bethenny").

• "Katie Couric" - "Dirty Little Secret in the Suburbs". Prescription medication and the warning signs every parent needs to know. (REPEAT)

• "Steve Harvey" - A man suffering from out of control spending, plus how parents can detect the warning signs that their teens may be suffering from depression. (REPEAT)

• "Dr. Phil" - A woman who discovered her husband had been secretly taking intimate videos of her with a hidden webcam, AND that he was posting them online. (REPEAT)

• "Dr. Oz Show" - "Your Biggest Cancer Risks: Dr. Oz's Biggest Solutions!" (REPEAT)

• "Wendy Williams" - Elle.com's Julia Allison, makeup artist Mally Roncal, author Dari Alexander ("The Quick & Clean Diet: Lose the Weight, Feel Great, and Stay Lean for Life") and blogger Micah Jesse. (REPEAT)

Tonight's Late Night Talk Shows:

• "Letterman" - Jamie Foxx ("White House Down"), Stanley Cup MVP Patrick Kane, and the Backstreet Boys present "The Top Ten". Music Guest: Wale. (REPEAT)

• "Jimmy Kimmel" - Keri Russell ("Austenland") and Harrison Ford ("Paranoia"). Music Guest: Joan Jett.

• "The Tonight Show" - Robin Williams ("The Butler") and Mark Cuban ("Shark Tank"). Music Guest: Gavin DeGraw.

• "Craig Ferguson" - James Marsden ("2 Guns" and "The Butler") and Meghan Markle ("Suits").

• "Jimmy Fallon" - Emma Roberts ("We're the Millers") and New York Yankees shortstop Derek Jeter. Music Guest: Jake Owen.

• "Carson Daly" - Chloe Chaidez and Boneshaker. Music Guests: The Coup and Glossary. (REPEAT)

• "Conan" - Jennifer Aniston ("We're the Millers") and Paul Scheer ("NTSF:SD:SUV"). Music Guest: Twenty One Pilots.

• "Jon Stewart" - Senator Kirsten Gillibrand.

• "The Colbert Report" - Author Colum McCann ("TransAtlantic: A Novel").

• "Chelsea Lately" - Guest hostRoss Mathews interviewsAndrew Dice Clay.

• "Piers Morgan Tonight" - Chef Rocco DiSpirito, Subway spokesperson Jared Fogle, and celebrity trainer Tracy Anderson discuss America's weight obsession.

Stupid News

You're Most Likely to Drink Wine at 6:53 P.M. on a Wednesday

According to a new survey, the time of the week when you're most likely to drink wine is . . . 6:53 P.M. on a Wednesday. Also, people slightly prefer red wine over white wine . . . and are more likely to drink wine at home than at a restaurant or bar.

(Cosmopolitan)

Here Are the Four Worst Days to Go Back-to-School Shopping

There's nothing worse than going back-to-school shopping, and having to THROW DOWN with the other moms over that last three-ring binder.

According to a new study, the four busiest days for back-to-school shopping are the next three Sundays, then the Monday after Labor Day. So don't go to Staples on a Sunday this month . . . outsmart everyone and go on a Saturday.

(Yahoo)

Stupid App of the Year: A Game That Tests How High You Can Throw Your Phone

There's a new cell phone app that's so stupid it's almost brilliant. It's a game called Send Me to Heaven, and it tests HOW HIGH you can throw your phone. It's available for free on Android, but Apple banned it from their App Store.

(IGN / Google Play)

A Dead Shark Somehow Ended Up on the New York Subway

A small DEAD SHARK turned up on a New York subway train yesterday morning, and no one's quite sure how it got there. There was speculation that it might be a promotional stunt for Discovery Channel's SHARK WEEK, but they quickly shot that down.

(Buzzfeed / Gothamist / New York Daily News)

The Best Pizza City in the Country Is . . . San Diego?

Believe it or not, the best pizza city in the country is . . . San Diego. The website TripAdvisor looked at the average ratings for all the pizza places in U.S. cities, and San Diego had the highest average score. The rest of the top five are Las Vegas, Boston, New York, and Seattle. Chicago didn't make the top 10.

(ABC News)

The Top Ten Party Cities in the World

Guyism.com did a list of the top 50 PARTY CITIES in the world, and there are six cities in the U.S. Number one is Rio de Janeiro in Brazil, followed by Ibiza, Spain. Las Vegas is #3, New Orleans is #8, New York is #12, Miami is #14, Los Angeles is #36, and Chicago is #50.

1. Rio de Janeiro, Brazil

2. Ibiza, Spain

3. Las Vegas, Nevada

4. Goa, India

5. Koh Phangan, Thailand

6. Cancun, Mexico

7. Bangkok, Thailand

8. New Orleans, Louisiana

9. Ios, Greece

10. Punta del Este, Uruguay

New York is number 12, Miami is 14, Los Angeles is 36, Chicago is 50 . . . and Montreal at number 20 is the only city in Canada to make the list. (Check out all 50 cities here.)

A Chinese Newspaper Publishes Photos Showing a Brutal Lethal Injection in the U.S. . . . But It Turns Out They're Actually From a Fetish Porn Film

This week, China's government-run news agency wanted to remind the Chinese people how GOOD they have it . . . so they published photos of a young woman's BRUTAL lethal injection death in the U.S. The only problem was . . . the pictures were actually still shots from a FETISH PORNO called "Lethal Injection".

(Daily Mail)

Celebrity Birthdays

Katie Leung - 26 (Cho Chang in the "Harry Potter" movies.)

Roger Federer - 32 (Dashing Swiss tennis superstar.)

Meagan Good - 32 (Cocolicious minx from "You Got Served" and "Waist Deep". Five or six of you may've seen her in "The Love Guru" and five or six of you from a very different demographic than that might've seen her in "Jumping the Broom".)

J.C. Chasez - 37 ('N Sync member who foolishly let EVA LONGORIA get away.)

RELATED COMEDY: JC Chasez of N Sync turns 37 today. His birthday wish, once again, is for Justin Timberlake to return his phone calls.

Drew Lachey - 37 ("Dancing with the Stars" KING and the shortest stud in 98 Degrees. He's 5-foot-6 and 148 pounds of hairless man-boy.)

Scott Stapp - 40 (Creed singer whose ego forced the rest of the band to kill Creed and form their own band, called Alter Bridge. They've since put their differences aside and reformed Creed. Do you care?)

Rena Mero - 46 (She WAS Sable in the WWF . . . until her ego got so big that Vince McMahon was forced to fire her . . . despite her fan-friendly voluptuousness.)

Kool Moe Dee - 51 (Rap legend and college graduate [from the State University of New York]. Kool Moe Dee did the original "Wild Wild West" AND the hip-hop classic "I Go To Work".)

Rikki Rockett - 52 (Poison's drummer. The groupies say he packs OVER EIGHT INCHES, and is not only good in bed, but treats the ladies with respect. Oh, and also . . . he hates zoos.)

The Edge - 52 (U2. According to Bono, he is, quote, "the most influential guitarist since the great composers Jimmy Page, Pete Townshend [and] Neil Young.") (While not the most asinine thing Bono has ever said, it's pretty close.)

Deborah Norville - 55 ("Inside Edition" minx.)

DONNY MOST! - 60 (RALPH MALPH ON "HAPPY DAYS"!)

Larry Wilcox - 66 (Ponch's honky partner Jon on "CHiPs".)

(He's now resting comfortably under the Rock of Obscurity with Larry Holmes, Larry Csonka AND Larry Poons. Isn't it about time he show up in one of those Syfy shark movies?)

Connie Stevens - 75 (Still a minx.)

Dustin Hoffman - 76

Countdown to Upcoming Events

• 22 days until Labor Day Weekend

• 31 days until Grandparents Day

• 42 days to Talk Like a Pirate Day

• 69 days until Boss's Day

• 1,261 days left of "Hope and Change"

Back in the day...

198 years ago . . . in 1815 - NAPOLEON BONAPARTE and his lonely testicle set sail for St. Helena to spend the remainder of their tiny days in exile.

137 years ago . . . in 1876 - THOMAS EDISON received a patent for his mimeograph. (Today's spoiled brats don't remember getting mimeographed homework assignments (we called 'em "dittos"), the ones with the purple ink that you usually couldn't read. But they smelled like HEAVEN.)

50 years ago . . . in 1963 - The classic movie "The Great Escape", starring STEVE MCQUEEN, JAMES GARNER and CHARLES BRONSON, was released.

39 years ago . . . in 1974 - PRESIDENT TRICKY DICK NIXON announced he would resign following new damaging revelations in the Watergate scandal.

27 years ago . . . in 1986 - Crack-head DAVID CROSBY was released from prison after serving eight months for drug and weapons possession.

27 years ago . . . in 1986 - STEPHEN KING'S "Stand By Me" was released. It starred RIVER "Dead Junkie" PHOENIX . . . COREY "Recovering Has-Been" FELDMAN . . . "Star Trek: The Next Generation's" WIL WHEATON . . . and JERRY "I Get to Nail Rebecca Romijn" O'CONNELL.

21 years ago . . . in 1992 - METALLICA singer JAMES HETFIELD was badly burned by a pyro explosion at a Montreal concert. At the same show, AXL ROSE claimed he "lost his voice" and cut GUNS 'N ROSES' set short. Fans were pissed. They rioted, and caused $300,000 in damage.