Your daily dose of whatever!!
Charlie Sheen Went on a Drunk Taco Bell Run . . . and Started Talking to Fans in the Drive-Thru Lane
There’s footage of CHARLIE SHEEN showing up drunk at a Taco Bell drive-thru last week, walking up to a couple’s car, and talking to them through their window. And just in case there was any confusion about whether or not he was drunk, he cleared that up by telling them, quote, “Sorry I’m so [effing] HAMMERED.” His rep noted that he was NOT driving though.
The 20 “Smartest” Celebrities on Twitter
According to “Time” magazine, Leonardo Dicaprio tweets at a higher reading level than any other celebrity. But his average tweet is still at less than an eighth-grade reading level. He’s followed by Justin Bieber’s mom, Jimmy Kimmel, Ludacris, and the guys from Green Day. And somehow, JWoww from “Jersey Shore” made the Top 10.
1. Leonardo DiCaprio. The average reading level of his tweets is grade 7.5.
2. Pattie Mallette . . . a.k.a., Justin Bieber’s mom. Grade level 7.3.
3. Jimmy Kimmel, grade 7.
4. Ludacris, 6.8.
5. The guys from Green Day, 6.8.
6. Samuel L. Jackson, 6.8.
7. Usher, 6.6.
8. JWoww from “Jersey Shore”, 6.6. (Yeah, we were surprised by that one too.)
9-14. Kevin Spacey, 6.5. He’s tied with: Wyclef Jean, Eva Longoria, Mike Tyson, Reverend Run, and British singer Jessie J.
15-20. Seth MacFarlane, 6.4. He’s tied with Pharrell, Flo Rida, Nicole Richie, Paris Hilton, and Brazilian author Paulo Coelho.
Kate Upton Spilled Out of Her Bikini and Showed Off Some Terrible Tan Lines
Detroit Tigers pitcher JUSTIN VERLANDER didn’t make the All-Star game this year, but I doubt he’s complaining. Because instead of going to that, he got to spend Tuesday with his on-again-off-again girlfriend KATE UPTON in Cancun.
There are a bunch of photos of them hanging out on a beach, and Kate was rocking some pretty serious tan lines. Apparently the last time she was in the sun, she wore a pretty COMPLEX piece of swimwear, with several straps across the back.
In some of the other photos, she’s spilling out of the tiny bikini she’s in. As far as the physics of it go, we’re honestly not sure HOW her top stayed on.
(Check out the photos here.)
Sexy Pictures of Famous People
1. CHARLIE SHEEN is all about porn stars these days . . . and that includes his fiancée Brett Rossi . . . but these new photos of 43-year-old DENISE RICHARDS in a bikini prove he wouldn’t have been bad off sticking with his old lady.
2. SELENA GOMEZ has a new tattoo on the upper right side of her back. Her tattoo artist shared a photo on Instagram . . . and said that it’s an Arabic translation of the phrase “Love Yourself First.” It’s unclear why it’s in Arabic.
Maybe Selena got it as a reminder to not put all her eggs in the JUSTIN BIEBER basket . . . AGAIN. But, since it’s hidden away on her back, there’s a good chance she forgets this sentiment the next time Justin texts her.
3. For some reason, 5 SECONDS OF SUMMER Tweeted a shot of CALUM HOOD’S nipple. If you’ve somehow avoided it up to this point, they’re the group that sings the song that goes: “You look so perfect standing there, in my American Apparel underwear.”
4. DEREK JETER posed for a photo with Cincinnati Reds third baseman TODD FRAZIER at the All-Star Game on Tuesday night . . . just like they did back in 1998, when Jeter was in his third season, and Todd was a 12-year-old in little league.
5. THE ROCK posted a hilarious old photo of himself for “Throwback Thursday,” where he’s rockin’ a black turtleneck and chain combo . . . along with jeans and a FANNY PACK. He captioned it, quote, “[The] fanny pack and lean take it to a whole other level . . . #90sRock #WTF #BuffLesbian.”
6. Is there any interest in seeing some blurry photos of LINDSAY LOHAN making out on a boat? Apparently, Lindsay thought she was far enough out to sea to elude the paparazzi . . . but as it turns out, they had their long lenses with them. The guy is some no-name from British reality TV.
If Every NBA Player Went “Home” Like LeBron James, the Washington Wizards Would Be Sick
A website has put together what the NBA’s starting lineups would be if EVERY basketball player went “home” like LEBRON JAMES. And the clear winner would be: The Washington Wizards, who’d have a SICK team . . . with Kevin Durant, Roy Hibbert, Carmelo Anthony, Ty Lawson and Rudy Gay.
(You can check out all the teams, here. Note: There’s a lot of debate over how this was done. They went with the players’ birthplaces, as opposed to where they grew up. But even then there are some inconsistencies.)
Lisa Whelchel and Kim Fields from “The Facts of Life” Were on “Good Morning America” . . . and Got a Video Message from Charlotte Rae
LISA WHELCHEL and KIM FIELDS were on “Good Morning America” yesterday, and they both still look GREAT. They played Blair and Tootie on “The Facts of Life”, which first aired 35 YEARS AGO. Lisa is 51 now, and Kim is 45.
They were there talking up their new TV movie, “For Better or For Worse”. In it, Lisa plays a wedding planner, and Kim is her best friend.
Then in the middle of their interview, they got a video message from CHARLOTTE RAE, who played Mrs. Garrett on the show. She’s 88 now and ALSO looks great. She told them she’s excited for the movie, and knows they’ll be brilliant in it.
“For Better or For Worse” premieres this Saturday on the Hallmark channel.
(You can watch their interview here.)
Thursday TV Reminders:
• “Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee” . . . Jon Stewart is featured in the next episode, which is available online at Noon Eastern. (Trailer)
• “Kids Choice Sports” . . . 8:00 to 9:30 P.M. on Nick. Michael Strahan hosts the first awards show to celebrate kids’ favorites in professional sports. It’s followed by behind-the scenes look at the “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles” movie at 9:30 p.m.
• “Hollywood Game Night” . . . from 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on NBC. Krysten Ritter, Wynonna Judd, Johnny Weir, Leah Remini, Nick Swardson, and Scott Foley.
• “Oprah Prime” . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on OWN. Oprah interviews Matthew Sandusky, adopted son and victim of Penn State child molester Jerry Sandusky.
• The series premiere of “Rush” . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on USA. British actor Tom Ellis plays a hard-partying doctor catering to L.A.’s elite.
• The series premiere of “Dating Naked” . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on VH1. A reality show where people strip butt naked before going on dates with three different people.
• “Last Comic Standing” . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on NBC. Howie Mandel mentors the seven remaining comedians as they act as tour guides for a Universal Studios tram.
• The series premiere of “Satisfaction” . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on USA. Matt Passmore from A&E’s “The Glades” catches his wife with a male escort, so he decides to sleep with one of the guy’s other clients to see what the appeal for her was.
• The series premiere of “You’re the Worst” . . . 10:00 to 10:30 P.M. on FX. A liar and a narcissist start a self-destructive relationship. It stars Aya Cash, who you may remember as Leonardo DiCaprio’s assistant on “Wolf of Wall Street”.
• The series premiere of “#CandidlyNicole” . . . 10:00 to 10:30 P.M. on VH1. A reality series about the fascinating daily life of Nicole Richie.
• The series premiere of “LeAnn & Eddie” . . . 10:30 to 11:00 P.M. on VH1. A reality series about the lives of LeAnn Rimes and her pilfered husband Eddie Cibrian.
Tonight’s Late Night Talk Shows:
• “The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon” – Jason Mraz.
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” – Julie Bowen, Brett Ratner, and Ben Kronberg.
• “Letterman” – Colin Firth, Tommy Johnagin, and St. Vincent.
• “Jimmy Kimmel” – Dane Cook, Mark Duplass, and Trey Songz. (Repeat)
• “Carson Daly” – Dave Attell, and You Won’t. (Repeat)
• “Conan” – Jason Segel, Cameron Diaz, and “Weird Al” Yankovic.
• “Craig Ferguson” – Julia Ormond and Dan Riskin.
• “Chelsea Lately” – Cameron Diaz.
• “Jon Stewart” – Emma Stone.
• “The Colbert Report” – Steven Wise.
Five Random Facts For Thursday
1. The Post Office made stamps featuring the Statue of Liberty four years ago. But the picture they used was of the Statue of Liberty outside New York, New York Casino in Las Vegas . . . not the actual Statue of Liberty. It’s not clear if it was an accident, or they just used it because it was a better photo.
2. The average home in the U.S. has 2.6 people . . . and 24 electronic gadgets.
3. Katy Perry’s mother once dated Jimi Hendrix.
4. It takes 27,000 trees to make all the toilet paper the world goes through in one day.
5. If you wanted to buy the parts in an iPhone back in 1991, it would’ve cost $3.56 million.
Here’s Why You Always Choose the Slowest Line at the Grocery Store
Here’s why you ALWAYS seem to choose the slowest line at the grocery store. Stores open JUST enough lines to handle customers . . . so if there’s even a SLIGHT delay in one lane it creates a pile-up. And your odds of picking a lane where something like that DOESN’T happen are small.
A Company in Chicago Limits Their Staff to Six Minutes in the Bathroom Per Day
A faucet company in Chicago felt like employees were spending too much time in the bathroom, so they started a new policy last month where everyone only gets six minutes in the bathroom per day. Nineteen people went over and got warnings, and could get suspended next time. The union has filed a complaint.
A Man Set His House on Fire Using a Homemade Flamethrower . . . Because He Wanted to Kill a Spider
A guy in Seattle wanted to kill a spider in his house, so he put together a HOMEMADE FLAMETHROWER . . . he held his lighter up to a can of spray paint to blast the spider. But he wound up setting the entire house on fire and did $60,000 in damage.
Mike Vogel is 34. Dale Barbie on “Under the Dome”.
Carey Hart is 39. Professional motocrosser who’s married to Pink. Pink looks like she can HURT YOU in the bedroom . . . but in that GOOD way.
Jason Clarke is 45. John Connor in next year’s “Terminator” movie. You may remember him as Dan in “Zero Dark Thirty”.
Alex Winter is 49. Bill S. Preston, Esquire in “Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure”, “Bill & Ted’s Bogus Journey” and MAYBE the THIRD “Bill & Ted” movie! Keanu is up for it, and it sounds like there’s an actual chance it’ll get made.
Mattress actress Brandy Alexandre is 50. She’s starred in 81 fine films, including . . . “Whore of the Roses”, “Camp Beaverlake”, “No Holes Barred”, “In Your Face . . . Again” AND “When Larry Ate Sally”!
Mark Burnett is 54. Producer behind reality shows like “The Apprentice”, “Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader?”, and “Survivor”. He’s married to “Touched By an Angel’s” Roma Downey, and they produced “The Bible” and “Son of God” together.
David Hasselhoff is 62. Single-handedly brought down the Berlin Wall, despite being an embarrassing alcoholic. Related Comedy: David Hasselhoff celebrates his 62nd birthday today. He’s just having a casual party: beer and burgers . . . off the floor.
Lucie Arnaz is 63. Famous for being Lucy and Desi’s daughter.
Terry “Geezer” Butler is 65. Bassist for Black Sabbath.
Camilla Parker-Bowles is 67. Prince Charles nails her real good.
Diahann Carroll is 79. Nubian goddess. In the 1960s she was engaged to Sidney Poitier. But she then tasted the sweet flavors of the interracially-taboo . . . and married honky crooner Vic Damone in 1987.
They divorced in 1996. It is not known if she has returned to devouring the darker and sweeter-berried juices.
Donald Sutherland is 79. President Snow in the “Hunger Games” movies. He’s a great actor but a mediocre reproducer . . . He sired Kiefer Sutherland.
PHYLLIS “DELICIOUS” DILLER! (1917 – 2012) Would you like to see Phyllis Diller TOPLESS? Then track down a 1991 horror flick called “The Boneyard”. For the first and only time in her career, Phyllis filmed the entire movie without wearing . . . A WIG!
Mick Tucker (1947 – 2002) Drummer in SWEET. They gave us the smashes “Little Willy”, “Fox on the Run” and “Ballroom Blitz”.
Vince Guaraldi (1928 – 1976) Jazz pianist who did the “Peanuts” music.
THE AMAZING ART LINKLETTER! (1912 – 2010) If you have to ask . . . you are OUT of the loop, Cletus. OUT OF IT.
James Cagney (1899 – 1986)
Countdown to Upcoming Events
• 1 day to International Mandela Day
• 11 days to World Hepatitis Day
• 15 days to Guardians of the Galaxy
• 21 days to Chicago Boot Camp
• 43 days to Labor Day Weekend
• 918 days left of “Hope and Change”
97 years ago . . . In 1917, the British royal family’s last name was changed from SAXE-COBURG GOTHA to WINDSOR.
59 years ago . . . In 1955, the racket that is DISNEYLAND opened in Anaheim, California.
55 years ago . . . in 1959, the legendary BILLIE HOLIDAY died from the effects of her HEROIN addiction at age 44. Believe it or not, she died with only 70 cents in the bank, but with $750 STRAPPED TO HER LEG, out of a deep-rooted fear of poverty.
49 years ago . . . In 1965, JAMES BROWN released THE perfect R&B smash . . . “Papa’s Got A Brand New Bag”. It sold two million copies and won the Grammy for Best R&B recording.
47 years ago . . . In 1967, the JIMI HENDRIX EXPERIENCE opened for . . . the MONKEES . . . at Forest Hills Stadium in New York.
33 years ago . . . In 1981, “Zorro: The Gay Blade” was released . . . starring leathery GEORGE HAMILTON.
16 years ago . . . In 1998, “The Mask Of Zorro” was released, starring ANTONIO BANDERAS and ANTHONY HOPKINS.
15 years ago . . . In 1999, HELEN HUNT married HANK AZARIA. They filed for divorce in December of 2000.
Three years ago . . . In 2011, CASEY ANTHONY got away with murdering her daughter and was set to be released from jail.