Your daily dose of whatever!
Jason Segel’s Mother Warned the Rest of His Family That He Showed His Penis in “Forgetting Sarah Marshall”
JASON SEGEL says his mother CRIED when she saw him do full-frontal nudity in “Forgetting Sarah Marshall”. Then she sent out a mass email warning to family and friends. It said, quote, “I would like to inform you all that Jason has chosen to do full-frontal nudity. However, it is not gratuitous and is essential to the plot.”
It Looks Like Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez are Back Together
JUSTIN BIEBER and SELENA GOMEZ looked like they were together again at a friend’s birthday party Monday night. Sources say they were holding hands and showing a little PDA . . . but nothing excessive. They left together when the party was over.
Sexy Pictures of Famous People
1. Sexy Video: IDINA MENZEL . . . or ADELE DAZEEM if you prefer . . . accidentally showed some UNDERBOOB during a sold-out show at Radio City Music Hall.
As an assistant came out to fix her top, she said, quote, “Well, [eff] it, they’re real.” (Here’s video. WARNING!!! The F-bomb is UNCENSORED.)
2. MELANIE GRIFFITH showed up at an event in Italy with her “Antonio” tattoo partially covered with makeup. She also moved her wedding ring to her middle finger.
3. (NC-17) MADONNA is still trying to stay relevant by doing sexy photo shoots. In her latest, she even shows some nipple. (Meanwhile, Madonna is reportedly nailing another 26-year-old dancer. Check out some pics here.)
4. NAYA RIVERA’S photo shoot for “Galore” magazine is all kinds of sexy.
5. Why, Internet, why? Somebody turned KIM KARDASHIAN and KANYE WEST into naked “Simpsons” characters.
In Case You Were Wondering, Miley Cyrus and Rihanna Roll Blunts Differently
Producer Mike Will Made It did a radio interview Monday . . . (On Hot 97 in New York) . . . during which he discussed a very important issue: The difference between the joint-rolling skills of MILEY CYRUS and RIHANNA.
Mike was asked who rolls the better blunt, but he wouldn’t really commit. He said, quote, “You know what it is? Rihanna rolls blunts. I don’t really smoke blunts. I smoke papers. Miley rolls papers, you know what I’m saying?”
But he did add that Miley can roll a pretty fat blunt. (Here’s video. Skip to 15:52. WARNING!!! Uncensored profanity.)
Some of the Nominees for This Year’s Teen Choice Awards Have Been Announced
The “first wave” of nominees for the Teen Choice Awards have been announced . . . and the shows “Pretty Little Liars” and “Vampire Diaries” lead the way with five nominees apiece. Fox will air the ceremony live on Sunday, August 10th. Voting is open now at TeenChoiceAwards.com.
The Situation Was Arrested After Fighting with His Brother at the Tanning Salon They Co-Own
Remember THE SITUATION from “Jersey Shore”? Well, he’s still acting like a total MEAT HEAD.
The Situation got into a serious BRAWL with his brother at the tanning salon they co-own in New Jersey. Someone called 911 . . . and when the cops go there, they arrested The Situation and charged him with simple assault.
He was released after posting $500 bail. (The Situation got a black eye in the fight, and he messed up his hand. TMZ has a photo of the damage, along with video of him explaining what went down, sort of.)
Bette Midler Mocked United Airlines on Twitter . . . for Serving Her 10 Tiny Pretzels
Airlines keep offering fewer and fewer amenities . . . and yesterday, BETTE MIDLER took United Airlines to task for the size of the snack she was given.
Bette Tweeted a photo of a Tic-Tac-sized pretzel in the palm of her hand . . . with the caption, quote, “The size of the ten pretzels they served in United Airlines First Class last week. Wait ’til you see the lunch.”
United Tweeted back, quote, “Bette, you have such beautiful hands. We’d like to know more about the lunch, too.” Bette responded with a photo of the lunch, which featured three mozzarella balls, two stalks of asparagus and some prosciutto.
Is “Office Space” Responsible for Putting an End to the “Flair” at T.G.I. Friday’s?
MIKE JUDGE . . . the guy behind “Office Space” . . . says he believes the movie is responsible for killing the button “flair” that the servers used to wear at T.G.I. Fridays. He says, “[A friend asked] the restaurant why their flair was missing, and they said they removed it because of ‘Office Space’.”
The NBA Finals Took the Top Three Spots in the Ratings
The final three games of the NBA Finals took the top three spots in the ratings. 18 million people saw the Spurs take out the Heat 104-87 in the final game. Meanwhile, the “Game of Thrones” fourth season finale pulled in 7.1 million viewers.
Hillary Clinton’s interview special, “Hillary Clinton: Public and Private”, had 6.5 million, and the O.J. Simpson special, “The People vs. O.J. Simpson: What the Jury Never Heard”, had 6.3 million. It aired the night before the 20th anniversary of the murders.
Here are last week’s Top 10 shows:
1. Game 5 of the “NBA Finals”, ABC, 18 million viewers.
2. Game 4 of the “NBA Finals”, ABC, 15 million viewers.
3. Game 3 of the “NBA Finals”, ABC, 14.8 million viewers.
4. “America’s Got Talent”, NBC, 11.5 million viewers.
5. “The Big Bang Theory”, CBS, 8.4 million viewers.
6. “NCIS”, CBS, 8.1 million viewers.
7. “60 Minutes”, CBS, 7.5 million viewers.
8. The “Game of Thrones” season finale, HBO, 7.1 million viewers.
9. “Night Shift”, NBC, 6.7 million viewers.
10. “NCIS: Los Angeles”, CBS, 6.6 million viewers.
Here are some other ratings you may care about:
• The third season premiere of TNT’s “Major Crimes” had 5.2 million viewers.
• The sixth season premiere of “Duck Dynasty” had 4.6 million viewers.
• The series premiere of TNT’s “Murder in the First” had 3.8 million viewers.
. . . That’s the one starring Taye Diggs and “Harry Potter’s” Tom Felton.
• The series finale of NBC’s “Growing Up Fisher” had 3.6 million viewers.
• The fifth season premiere of “Pretty Little Liars” had 2.7 million viewers.
• The fourth season premiere of “Suits” had 2.5 million viewers.
• The sixth season premiere of “Royal Pains” had 2.4 million viewers.
• Saturday: The finale of ABC’s “Sing Your Face Off” had 2.3 million viewers.
2176c• The series premiere of “Big Smo” . . . 10:30 to 11:00 P.M. on CMT.
• The first season finale of “The 100″ brought in 1.7 million viewers for the CW.
• The 2nd season premiere of “Graceland” got 1.6 million people for the USA Network.
• The series premiere of “Chasing Life” had 1.3 million on ABC Family.
Wednesday TV Reminders:
• “So You Think You Can Dance” . . . 8:00 to 10:00 P.M. on Fox. Jenna Dewan Tatum guest judges.
• The third season finale of “Baby Daddy” . . . 8:30 to 9:00 P.M. on ABC Family.
• “Duck Dynasty” . . . from 10:00 to 10:30 P.M. on A&E. Jase Robertson takes his son Reed frog fishing the night before high school graduation.
Tonight’s Late Night Talk Shows:
• “The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon” – Rosario Dawson, Jeff Musial, and Fun.
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” – Mike Myers, Shep Gordon, Whitney Cummings, and Tove Lo.
• “Letterman” – Dana Carvey, Ellie Kemper, and British singer Sam Smith.
• “Jimmy Kimmel” – Mike Tyson and the hip-hop group Young Fathers.
• “Carson Daly” – James Adomian, Night Terrors of 1927, and “Chicagoland”. (Repeat)
• “Conan” – Elijah Wood, Jason Mantzoukas, and The Both.
• “Craig Ferguson” – Noah Wyle and Abigail Spencer.
• “Chelsea Lately” – Laverne Cox.
• “Jon Stewart” – Kevin Hart.
• “The Colbert Report” – Katty Kay & Claire Shipman.
Five Random Facts For Wednesday
1. There are 224 million cable boxes in the U.S. . . . and they consume as much electricity as four huge nuclear reactors put out. Other than air conditioning, they’re the biggest energy user in your house.
2. Different states offer different payouts to people who were wrongly locked up. Wisconsin gives you the least, at $5,000 for every year you were in prison . . . Texas gives you the most, at $80,000 per year.
3. Howard Johnson hotels are a luxury brand in China . . . they’re all four or five star hotels.
4. Only 5% of the calls routed to fire departments in the U.S. are for actual fires. Most of them are for medical emergencies.
5. There are only five people left on Earth who were born in the 1800s. And within a few years, that number will be zero.
Half the People on a Diet Won’t Shut Up About It . . . Here Are the 10 Things They Yap About
A new survey found HALF the people on a diet become obsessed with talking about it. The top five things they bring up are what they’ve been cooking, what they’ve eaten that day, the calories in what YOU’RE eating, the right foods for you to have, and the amount of alcohol you drink.
1. What they’ve cooked recently.
2. What they’ve had to eat that day.
3. The calories in what you’re eating.
4. The right and wrong foods or drinks for you to have.
5. The amount of alcohol you drink.
6. The fat content in food.
7. The sugar content in food.
8. The health risks from different foods or drinks.
9. How you really should be doing a similar diet.
10. The additives in food. (Daily Mail)
The FBI Keeps a Database of 2,800 Acronyms People Use on the Internet . . . Most of Which Are Insanely Obscure
The FBI keeps an updated database of the acronyms people use online, and it’s got 2,800 entries . . . most of which are incredibly obscure. Including WTFT . . . “What the French toast?” And CBINB . . . “I can’t believe it’s not butter.”
WYLABOCTGWTR . . . Would you like a bowl of cream to go with that remark?
WTFT . . . What the French toast?
NIFOC . . . Naked in front of computer.
ICBINB . . . I can’t believe it’s not butter.
IITYWIMIWHTKY . . . If I tell you what it means I will have to kill you.
PMYMHMMFSWGAD . . . Pardon me, you must have mistaken me for someone who gives a damn. (Muckrock)
We Get Herpes Because Our Ancestors Couldn’t Resist Super Sexy Monkeys
A new study found the reason why one in four Americans has genital herpes. Millions of years ago, early humans like Homo erectus just couldn’t resist getting-it-on with super sexy monkeys. They got herpes, and it’s been going around in humans ever since.
A Woman Grabs Her Dog’s Water Bowl to Put Out a Fire . . . Without Realizing Her Three-Year-Old Filled It with Gasoline
A woman in Kentucky picked up her dog’s water bowl to put out a small fire on Saturday. But her three-year-old had accidentally filled it with GASOLINE. So the small fire turned into a RAGING fire, which spread to their neighbor’s house. Luckily no one was hurt.
Firefighters Rescue a Suicidal Man by Spraying Him With a Water Cannon
A suicidal guy in China climbed out a fifth-story window on Monday, and sat on the windowsill because he was depressed. But firefighters prevented him from jumping by BLASTING him with a WATER cannon . . . so his only choice was to climb back in.
Willa Holland is 23. Oliver Queen’s annoying little sister Thea on “Arrow”.
Meaghan Rath is 28. Sally the sexy dark-skinned ghost on Syfy’s “Being Human”.
David Giuntoli is 34. Nick Burkhardt, the fairy tale slaying star of “Grimm”.
Blake Shelton is 38. Before he became one of the judges on “The Voice”, his biggest claim to fame was nailing his fellow country singer Miranda Lambert.
Alana De La Garza is 38. She was ADA Connie Rubirosa on “Law & Order”. The producers cast her because, ya know, en fuego Latina supermodels regularly become assistant district attorneys in the biggest city in the country.
Ray LaMontagne is 40. Before he decided to get into the music business, he was working double shifts at a shoe factory in New Hampshire. Then he realized he wasn’t a 10-year-old Cambodian child . . . quit . . . and started blowing up.
Nathan Morris is 43. One of the four studs of Boyz II Men. He’s got a crazy vocal range . . . he can sing both baritone and soprano. He also has a college degree in computer programming.
Dominique Simone is 43. Former pornographic prostitute who’s starred in 292 fine films, including “Black Men Can Hump”, “Analyze These” AND “The Best of My Baby Got Back”. Now she’s retired and works as a loan officer.
Dizzy Reed is 51. Guns ‘N Roses keyboardist. Still. Him and Axl are the only two leftovers from the glory days. Neither of them attended Guns’ Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction. Dizzy probably wanted to, but knew he’d be FIRED if he did.
Randy Spears is 53. Well-hung pornographic he-whore who’s starred in 1385 fine films, including “Desperately Horny Housewives”, “Sex Idol”, “What About Boob?”, “Vagina Town”, “Throbbin Hood”, “Thighs Wide Open” and “Sex Trek 1, 2, AND 3″.
Jude Cole is 54. Music superstar behind the sweet, sweet jam “Baby, It’s Tonight”. Now resting comfortably under the Rock of Obscurity next to Richard Marx and Nelson.
Isabella Rossellini is 62. Some people say she’s still got it. I just don’t see it . . . as she’s gotten older, she’s somehow started looking more and more like a 12-year-old boy.
Carol Kane is 62. Latka’s wife, Simka, on “Taxi” . . . AND Miracle Max’s [Billy Crystal's] wife in “The Princess Bride”.
Paul McCartney is 72. Lead singer of Wings!
Roger Ebert would have been 72. (1942 – 2013) Legendary movie critic. Thyroid cancer took his ability to speak, so a company called CereProc took all of his old “Siskel & Ebert” footage and made him a text-to-speech computer that talked IN HIS OWN VOICE. (There’s a new documentary about Roger called “Life Itself”. Check out the trailer here.)
Uday Hussein (1964 – 2003)
Lech Kaczynski (1949 – 2010) Polish president who died in 2010 when the Polish Air Force plane he was riding in crashed in Russia. His wife was with him and also died in the crash.
Countdown to Upcoming Events
• 16 days to Independence Day
• 23 days to World Population Day
• 44 days to Guardians of the Galaxy
• 50 days to Chicago Boot Camp
• 72 days to Labor Day Weekend
• 947 days left of “Hope and Change”
332 years ago . . . In 1682, WILLIAM PENN founded the city of PHILADELPHIA and called it “THE CITY OF BROTHERLY LOVE”. (Go to any Eagles, Phillies, Sixers or Flyers home game and you’ll spend the rest of your life wondering why.)
141 years ago . . . In 1873, SUSAN B. ANTHONY was fined $100 for attempting to vote in the 1872 presidential election (between Ulysses S. Grant and Horace Greeley). She refused to pay the fine. And women finally could vote . . . 47 years later.
66 years ago . . . In 1948, Columbia Records unveiled its new “LONG-PLAYING” PHONOGRAPH RECORDS (LPs) in New York City. The new disc turned at 33 1/3 revolutions per minute, offering superior sound quality and fewer interruptions than 78 rpm records.
47 years ago . . . In 1967, the JIMI HENDRIX EXPERIENCE made their U.S. debut at the Monterey Pop Festival. At the end of their set, Jimi set his guitar on fire and became an overnight superstar. He capitalized on the newfound fame . . . by opening for THE MONKEES.
37 years ago . . . In 1977, SEX PISTOLS members PAUL COOK and JOHNNY ROTTEN were stabbed by men who found the group’s song “God Save The Queen” offensive.
31 years ago . . . In 1983, the gorgeous astronaut SALLY RIDE became America’s FIRST WOMAN IN SPACE.
27 years ago . . . In 1987, BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN officially separated from his wife JULIANNE PHILLIPS after photos of Springsteen with backup singer PATTI SCIALFA appeared on “Entertainment Tonight.” Bruce and Patti are still together.
14 years ago . . . In 2000, TIGER WOODS won the U.S. Open by a record 15 strokes. And then, most likely, celebrated by receiving a good deal of stroking from whatever random white trash waitress he could find that night.
Four years ago . . . In 2010, a double sided sheet of paper that JOHN LENNON hand wrote the BEATLES’ song “A Day In The Life” sold for $1.2 million.