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Whatever 4.22

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(NC-17)  Check Out Scarlett Johansson Fully Nude in Her New Movie 

 

 

You know those leaked, naked SCARLETT JOHANSSON cell phone pictures you’ve been holding onto for a couple years?  Well, you can ditch those, because I’ve got something even BETTER.

 

 

Scarlett goes FULL-FRONTAL in her new movie “Under the Skin”, and a nice, relatively clean set of pictures just hit the web.  (Check ‘em out here.  WARNING!!!  Most of Scarlett is visible in these photos.)

Is Charlie Sheen Getting Married in November? 

 

 

CHARLIE SHEEN and mattress actress BRETT ROSSI will reportedly make The Big Mistake on November 22nd.

 

 

A source says, quote, “It’s going to be extremely elaborate, and Charlie has told Brett to plan the wedding of her dreams, with no cap on the budget.”  There’s a rumor that they wanted to do it sooner, but Brett supposedly isn’t divorced from her last husband yet.

 

 

However, Brett went onto Twitter to shut down that rumor by telling RadarOnline, quote, “Your articles about Charlie & I are so inaccurate it’s pathetic.  I’ve never had a wedding before.  Get your facts straight.”

Sexy Pictures of Famous People 

 

 

1.  Check out KENDALL JENNER, JADEN SMITH, and the guy who played Rico on “Hannah Montana” clowning around during the second and final weekend of Coachella.

 

 

 

2.  BEYONCÉ wore a practically non-existent pair of shorts to Coachella this weekend.

 

 

 

3.  REDFOO from LMFAO was a guest judge last night on “Dancing With the Stars” . . . so regular judge LEN GOODMAN decided to dress like him.

 

 

 

4.  Yes, these “Real Housewives” chicks are generally a mess, but it’s hard to deny that New York’s KELLY BENSIMON can rock a bikini.

 

 

 

5.  Even though we think KRIS and BRUCE JENNER are still separated, Kris posted an old picture of them together to mark their 23rd anniversary.

 

 

She captioned it, quote, “Happy Anniversary to one of the most amazing men I know!!!!  I love you, Wow 23 years!!!!!”

6.  KIM KARDASHIAN gets all the attention for her backside, but KOURTNEY’S got some booty, too.

 

 

 

7.  For some reason, these pictures of ANNE HATHAWAY wearing a dress that looks like overalls and throwing a football under her leg just brightened my day.

 

 

 

8.  A little SELENA GOMEZ side-boob never hurt anyone.

 

 

 

9.  NICK JONAS is about to hit the heavy bag.

 

 

 

10.  MILA KUNIS is really starting to show.

 

 

 

11.  MEL B went to fix something up under her skirt and showed off some buttcheek.

The Ten Actors and Actresses With the Biggest Social Media Presence 

A company that tracks actors’ engagement on social media has compiled lists of the Top 10 Actors and Actresses on Facebook and Twitter.  VIN DIESEL is the biggest on Facebook, with 72.3 million “likes.”  JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE is #1 on Twitter, with 31.8 million followers.

1.  Vin Diesel, 72.3 million likes

 

2.  Will Smith, 65.7 million

 

3.  Selena Gomez, 58.1 million

 

4.  Jackie Chan, 55.7 million

 

5.  Adam Sandler, 50.7 million

 

6.  Megan Fox, 49.1 million

 

7.  Justin Timberlake, 34.9 million

 

8.  Jennifer Lopez, 34.3 million

 

9.  Taylor Lautner, 31.2 million

 

10.  Dwayne Johnson, 31.1 million

Actors and Actresses Who Will Never Work Together Again 

Sometimes when actors work together, things go bad.  Actors who’ve vowed to never work together again include Alyssa Milano and Shannen Doherty . . . Julia Roberts and Nick Nolte . . . Bill Murray and Lucy Liu . . . and Tyrese and James Franco.

Meryl Streep Once Thought She Was “Too Ugly” to Be an Actress 

MERYL STREEP once thought she wasn’t pretty enough to be an actress.  She said, quote, “I was always in plays, but I thought I was too ugly to be an actress.  Glasses weren’t fabulous then.”  She also said she used to hate her nose . . . but added that you have to learn to embrace what makes you different.

Lindsay Lohan Did Not Give an Interview Where She Drank Vodka and Talked About Nailing Jared Leto and a Married Guy 

LINDSAY LOHAN’S rep says a magazine totally fabricated an interview in which Lindsay claims she’s seeing a guy who’s married with kids, brags about nailing JARED LETO, and suggests that JENNIFER LAWRENCE slept her way to the top.  Lindsay was supposedly drinking vodka during the interview, and the writer also claims she took ecstasy at Coachella.

Michael Jackson Once Yelled at His Son For Letting the Dog Poop in the House . . . After Moonwalking Into it? 

In a new book coming out in June, two of MICHAEL JACKSON’S former bodyguards claim Michael lit into his son PRINCE for letting his dog make a mess in the house.  And Michael only discovered the pile after he MOONWALKED into it.

The book is called “Remember the Time:  Protecting Michael Jackson in His Final Days”, and it’s coming out in June.  (You can read more about what’s in it here.)

 

A Guy From “Ice Road Truckers” Kidnapped a Prostitute and Made Her Jump Out a Second-Story Window 

A guy named TIM ZICKUHR who used to be on “Ice Road Truckers” was arrested for kidnapping and beating up a prostitute in Las Vegas.  They were arguing over money.  During the incident, the woman tricked Tim into calling a COP friend of hers, who arrested Tim.

So she gave him the number of a COP she knows.  Then Tim called the guy without KNOWING he was a cop . . . and said he would kill her if he didn’t get $1,000.

 

 

So they arranged another meeting, Tim was arrested, and apparently he confessed to everything.  Oh  . . . and at some point during all this chaos, Tim supposedly made the woman jump out a second-story WINDOW.

 

 

The History Channel says Tim hasn’t been on any “Ice Road” episodes since 2011.  (Check out his mugshot.)

Are Tiger Woods’ Girlfriend and Ex-Wife Good Friends? 

 

 

This might be a little weird:  TIGER WOODS’ ex-wife ELIN NORDEGREN and his current girlfriend LINDSEY VONN are supposedly GOOD FRIENDS.

 

 

The word is that Elin decided to get to know Lindsey because she realized that Lindsey was going to be in her children’s lives . . . and they hit it off.

 

 

A source says, quote, “You’d think it would be weird, but Elin loves Lindsey and they talk all the time.  Elin likes that Lindsey is a strong woman.”

Tuesday TV Reminders:

 

 

“The Voice” . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on NBC.  The live eliminations send two home.

 

 

“Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.” . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on ABC.  Coulson races to save the woman he loves, who’s played by Amy Acker from “Person of Interest”.

 

 

“Glee” . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on Fox.  It’s Rachel’s opening night for “Funny Girl”.

 

 

• The 10th season premiere of “The Deadliest Catch” . . . 8:00 to 11:00 P.M. on Discovery.  Sig Hansen’s 18-year-old daughter joins the Northwestern’s crew in the premiere at 9:00 p.m.  And the captains discuss cast changes in the 8 o’clock hour.

 

 

“Celebrity Wife Swap” . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on ABC.  Eric Roberts and Robin Leach exchange women.

 

 

“Celebrities Undercover” . . . 10:30 to 11:00 P.M. on Oxygen.  Chilli from TLC and Adrienne Bailon from the Cheetah Girls are this week’s pranksters.

 

 

• The series premiere of “Faking It” . . . 10:30 to 11:00 P.M. on MTV.  Two girls pretend to be lesbians to be nominated as homecoming queens.  It stars former “American Idol” contestant Katie Stevens and “Hungover Games” minx Rita Volk.

 

Tonight’s Late Night Talk Shows:

 

 

“The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon”John Oliver, David Duchovny, and Rita Ora.

 

 

“Late Night with Seth Meyers”Sofia Vergara, Natalie Dormer, and Jonah Keri.

 

 

“Letterman”Stephen Colbert, Robin Roberts, Kelis and Sam Moore, of Sam & Dave.

 

 

“Jimmy Kimmel”Don Rickles, Emily Deschanel, and Beck.

 

 

“Carson Daly”Jared Harris from “Mad Men”, comedian Andrew Schultz, and The Growlers.

 

 

“Arsenio”Jared Harris from “Mad Men”, Marlon Wayans and Gabriel Iglesias.  Music Guest: Joe Satriani.

 

 

“Conan”Zac Efron, Michael B. Jordan, Miles Teller, Ellie Kemper, and Neko Case.  (Repeat)

 

 

“Craig Ferguson”“Secret Life of a Call Girl” star Billie Piper (Showtime’s “Penny Dreadful”) and Cedric the Entertainer.

 

 

“Chelsea Lately”Wiz Khalifa sits down with guest host T.J. Miller.

 

 

“Jon Stewart” – Senator Elizabeth Warren, the driving force behind the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau.

 

 

“The Colbert Report” – Journalist George Will.

“Madea’s Neighbors from Hell” is on DVD and Simon Pegg’s “A Fantastic Fear of Everything” is on Netflix

 

 

Here’s what’s new on DVD today:

 

The Suspect is about an all-white town that has its first armed bank robbery . . . on the same day a black guy passes through town.  Mekhi Phifer is their angry suspect.

 

• The Tyler Perry stage play Madea’s Neighbors from Hell . . . which is about Madea and Aunt Bam teaching some manners to a group of disrespectful kids who move into the neighborhood with their foster mother.  (Trailer)

 

Barefoot is a romantic comedy starring Scott Speedman, and Evan Rachel Wood.  She’s a naïve psychiatric patient that he takes home for his brother’s wedding.

 

A Farewell to Fools . . . starring Gerard Depardieu, as a guy being pressured by the rest of the town to take responsibility for the death of a Nazi soldier when no one else can find the real killer.

 

This week’s other DVD releases also include the third season of the ’80s sitcom “Newhart” . . . the Disney Channel snowboarding movie “Cloud 9″ . . . Tracy Morgan’s stand-up special “Bona Fide” . . . the Gettysburg Address documentary “The Address” . . . and the boxing documentary “The Trials of Muhammad Ali”.

 

 

Here’s what’s new on Netflix Instant Streaming in the past week:

 

A Fantastic Fear of Everything stars Simon Pegg as a writer who becomes convinced that he’s being stalked by the murderers he’s been researching for his book.

 

A Farewell to Fools stars Gerard Depardieu as a simpleton coerced by the rest of the townsfolk into taking the fall for murdering a Nazi soldier at the end of World War II.

 

Charlie Countryman stars Shia LaBeouf as a guy who falls for a Romanian chick and then has to fight off her violent ex.

 

Danny Deckchair stars Rhys Ifans as a guy who ties a bunch of helium balloons to his chair, flies across Australia, and gets shot out of the sky by fireworks celebration.

 

 

And on the Video Game front . . .

 

“Call of Duty” players can download a customization for “Ghosts” today that features Snoop Dogg doing the multiplayer call outs.  There’s also one to hear the voice of “Full Metal Jacket” drill instructor R. Lee Ermey instead.  (Snoop Dogg Trailer)

 

 

 

 

New CDs from Sebastian Bach, Def Leppard’s Joe Elliott, and Iggy Azalea

 

 

Give ‘Em Hell, Sebastian Bach

 

 

The Further Adventures Of . . ., Down N Outz . . . which is Joe Elliott from Def Leppard backed by the British rock band The Quireboys.

 

 

3 Lions, the self-titled album from the British rock band Three Lions

 

 

Aviation, the New York rock band Semi Precious Weapons

 

 

Life Imitating Life, the San Diego rock band Augustana

 

 

Modern Creation, the garage rock band The Whigs

 

 

Cannibals with Cutlery, To Kill a King.  They do a YouTube series called Ralph’s Balcony where they perform with guests on their lead singer’s balcony.  Check them out doing balcony acoustic versions of two tracks from the album here and here.

 

 

Ready Steady Go, Drake Bell from Nickelodeon’s “Drake & Josh”.  The lead single is called “Bitchcraft” and, although that title and chorus might offend some people, it’s really a light-hearted and suprisingly rockin’ tune.  Check it out here.

 

 

The New Classic, Iggy Azalea . . . Australian minx who does the hip hop songs “Fancy” and “Work”.  Jam to the uncensored profanity of her songs here and here.

Honest, Future . . . Kanye guests on “I Won”, and Pharrell guests on “Move That Dope”.  Groove to the uncensored profanity of those tracks here and here.

 

 

Sugar, G. Love & Special Sauce . . . reunited for their 20th anniversary

 

 

Food, Kelis

 

 

If We’re Honest, Christian pop minx Francesca Battistelli

 

 

Fortune, Black Prairie

 

 

Rachel Lynae, the debut album from country minx Rachel Lynae

 

 

Daredevils, Justin Rutledge

 

 

Rented World, The Menzingers

 

 

The Cautionary Tale of Mark Oliver Everett, The Eels

 

 

Pop Psychology, Neon Trees

 

 

Dconstructed, Various Artists . . . a dance remix of classic Disney songs by electronic DJs like Avicii, Kaskade, and Armin Van Buuren.  The track list includes “The Circle of Life”, “Let It Go”, and the “Muppet Show” theme.  (Livestream)

 

 

All This Bad Blood, Bastille . . . a two-disc extended version of their debut album

 

 

Demolicious, Green Day . . . a collection of 18 demos they released on Saturday for Record Store Day.  (Instagram)

Five Random Facts For Tuesday

1.  Giraffes sleep for less than two hours a day.  Pythons sleep for at least 18 hours.

 

 

2.  In a “Spider-Man” comic that came out in 2006, Spider-Man accidentally killed Mary Jane Watson by knocking her up with his radioactive spermatozoa.

 

 

3.  Google was originally called BackRub, when they came up with the idea in 1996.  The founders changed the name to Google about a year later.

 

 

4.  Sneezes leave your mouth at up to 93 miles-per-hour.

 

 

5.  STEPHEN HAWKING believes the egg came before the chicken.

 

 

(Time / Topless Robot / Google / LiveScience / Fox News)

A Skydiver Crashed Into an Easter Egg Hunt and Died When His Parachute Didn’t Open

 

A family in New Jersey was having an Easter egg hunt in their backyard on Sunday . . . when a SKYDIVER came falling out of the sky.  Turns out it his parachute hadn’t opened.  The family tried to help him, but he died in the hospital about an hour-and-a-half later.

(NBC 10 – Philadelphia)

The Top 10 Status Symbols Today, and the Top 10 Status Symbols From the ’80s

A new survey compared the top status symbols from the ’80s to the top status symbols today.  And only one thing was the same:  Sending your kids to private school.  Some of the other ones today are a fancy car, a pool, and flying first class.  Some of the other ones from the ’80s are a car phone, color TV, and a cordless phone.

1.  A fancy car.

 

2.  A designer watch.

 

3.  A swimming pool.

 

4.  Flying first class.

 

5.  Owning a second home.

 

6.  Having a tennis court.

 

7.  Sending your kids to private school.

 

8.  Having a vacation home.

 

9.  A home with electric front gates.

 

10.  A nanny.

Here are the top 10 status symbols from the ’80s . . . and they’re mostly things we take for granted today.

 

 

1.  A car phone.

 

2.  A dishwasher.

 

3.  Sending your kids to private school.

 

4.  Having two cars.

 

5.  Going overseas for a vacation.

 

6.  Having a sunroom.

 

7.  Owning a horse.

 

8.  A color TV.

 

9.  Diamond jewelry.

 

10.  Having a cordless phone.

Here’s Why It’s Impossible For Men to Talk in a Sexy Voice

According to a new study, it’s IMPOSSIBLE for men to talk in a sexy voice.  Women rated men’s normal voices and their attempts at a “sexy” voice . . . and their normal voices actually scored BETTER.  The opposite was true for women.  When women talked like SCARLETT JOHANSSON in a low, breathy voice, they were rated sexier.

 

(HealthDay)

79% of Us Don’t Believe in the Big Bang . . . and Eight More Stats About Science

 

According to a new survey, 82% of people now accept that smoking causes cancer, and 71% agree that mental illness is a “medical condition.”  But just 33% feel confident that humans are the main cause of global warming.  And only 21% strongly agree that the universe was created by a big bang.

(AP / Yahoo)

A College Has Banned Students From Taking Selfies at Graduation

A university in Rhode Island just BANNED students from taking selfies during graduation next month . . . because they’re afraid every kid will do it while they’re accepting their diploma, and the ceremony will take forever.

(The Week)

What’s the Best Accidental Nudity You’ve Ever Seen in Person?

What’s the best ACCIDENTAL NUDITY you’ve ever seen in person?  A few of the best stories are a guy who saw a naked woman putting up a Christmas tree in June . . . and a pizza delivery guy who had a woman answer the door with one of her breasts accidentally hanging out.

 

1.  “Some friends and I were walking home from a bar around 3:00 A.M.  Suddenly, we noticed an attractive naked woman putting up a Christmas tree.  It was June.”

 

 

2.  “I was at a wedding reception when a guy across the table asked the woman next to me if she’d gotten a baked potato.  Turns out her light brown boob had slipped out of her dress onto the plate and he thought it was a potato.”

 

 

3.  “I passed out in a female friend’s dorm room freshman year of college.  When I woke up, she and a friend of hers were both changing.  They still thought I was asleep, and I didn’t move at all to make sure it stayed that way.”

 

 

4.  “I’m 42 but I’ll never forget when I was at camp in 6th grade, we were all sitting in a circle cross-legged, and one of the hot female counselors’ ’80s-style short shorts shifted to the side.  It was the first time I ever saw lady parts, and it changed my life.”

 

 

5.  “I was delivering pizza and a woman opened the door with one of her breasts accidentally hanging out.  Could’ve been the beginning of a porn scene . . . at least until her gigantic boyfriend walked over.  They tipped me $6.  Good people.”  (Reddit)

 

The Nicest People in the World Are Elderly Women Whose Husbands Just Died

A new study found the KINDEST people in the world are old women . . . people with upbeat, positive personalities . . . and people who recently suffered a major loss.  So an upbeat old lady whose husband just died is probably the nicest person you’re going to find.

(UCSD)

Amber Heard is 28.  Proud bisexual who wrecked Johnny Depp’s happy home.  Now they’re engaged.  She’s the blonde minx who teams up with Nicolas Cage in “Drive Angry”.  You may also remember her as Seth Rogen’s younger girlfriend in “Pineapple Express”, and as Jesse Eisenberg’s sexy-but-infected neighbor, 406, at the beginning of “Zombieland”.

Michelle Ryan is 30.  Cute but irrelevant brunette who failed to get people interested in NBC’s unsuccessful “Bionic Woman” remake.

 

 

Gemma Whelan is 33.  Yara Greyjoy on “Game of Thrones”.

 

 

Daniel Johns is 35.  Silverchair singer who no longer gets to nail Natalie Imbruglia any time he wants to.

 

 

Shavo Odadjian is 40.  System of a Down bassist.

 

 

Sherri Shepherd is 47.  Annoying Nubian “View” yenta and also Tracy Jordan’s wife Angie on “30 Rock”.

 

 

Sheryl Lee is 47.  Laura Palmer on “Twin Peaks”, and the sexy, gringa wife on that 2003 Mexican drug dealer show, “Kingpin”.

Jeffrey Dean Morgan is 48.  Izzie’s dead lover Denny on “Grey’s Anatomy”, Sam & Dean’s dead father on “Supernatural” and Mary Louise Parker’s dead husband on “Weeds”.  But the pivotal role of his career was the dead superhero The Comedian in “Watchmen”.  Now he’s on a Starz series called “Magic City”.

 

 

Byron Allen is 53.  COMEDY AND TALK SHOW LEGEND!

 

 

Ryan Stiles is 55.  Lanky 6-foot-6 comic from “Whose Line Is It Anyway?” and “The Drew Carey Show”.  He also lives in a house once owned by LIBERACE.

 

 

’70s rock legend Peter Frampton is 64.

 

 

John Waters is 68.  Groundbreaking, subversive and trashy filmmaker whose credits include “Pink Flamingoes”, “Female Trouble” and the ORIGINAL, non-musical version of “Hairspray”.

JACK NICHOLSON is 77.  Poon legend.  Shirley MacLaine refused to nail him because he was TOO DANGEROUS.

Glen Campbell is 78“Drunken Rhinestone Cowboy”.

 

 

Charlotte Rae is 88.  One of the few living cast members from “Diff’rent Strokes” . . . along with Todd Bridges and Danny Cooksey.  She also did the spin-off show, “The Facts of Life”.

 

 

Marilyn Chambers  (1952 – 2009)  She started her showbiz career as the wholesome-looking mom holding the IVORY SNOW BABY.  (True!)

 

 

Aaron Spelling  (1923 – 2006)  TV legend.  Gave us “90210″, “Fantasy Island”, “The Love Boat”, “Dynasty” AND “T.J. Hooker”.  NOT an attractive man . . . and he has passed that trait to another generation.

 

 

Eddie Albert  (1906 – 2005“Green Acres” superstar.

 

 

J. Robert Oppenheimer  (1904 – 1967)  Evil genius who created the atomic bomb.

Countdown to Upcoming Events

• 1 day to Secretary’s Day

• 10 days to Spider Man 2

• 19 days to Mother’s Day

• 31 days to Memorial Day Weekend

• 54 days to Father’s Day

• 1,004 days left of “Hope and Change”

150 years ago . . . In 1864, Congress authorized the use of the phrase “IN GOD WE TRUST” on U.S. coins.

 

 

48 years ago . . . In 1966, “Wild Thing”, by the British band THE TROGGS, was released in the U.S.  That’s the theme song of the rebellious pitcher Charlie Sheen played in the “Major League” movies.

45 years ago . . . In 1969, for some reason, JOHN LENNON legally changed his middle name . . . from John Winston Lennon to JOHN ONO LENNON.

 

 

44 years ago . . . In 1970, the first EARTH DAY was celebrated.

 

 

38 years ago . . . In 1976, BARBARA WALTERS became network TV’s FIRST ANCHOR WOMAN when she signed on to co-anchor the “ABC Evening News” with Harry Reasoner for $1 million a year.

36 years ago . . . In 1978, JOHN BELUSHI and DAN AYKROYD first appeared as THE BLUES BROTHERS on “Saturday Night Live”.

33 years ago . . . In 1981, ERIC CLAPTON was hospitalized after a car accident in Seattle, Washington.  Thankfully, he only suffered “bruised ribs and a lacerated chin.”

 

 

31 years ago . . . In 1983, the amazing film “Losin’ It” was released . . . starring TOM CRUISE as a teenager who crosses the border to Tijuana to lose his virginity.  JACKIE EARLE HALEY plays one of Tom’s friends.

 

 

20 years ago . . . In 1994, RICHARD NIXON died of a stroke at the age of 82.

 

 

16 years ago . . . In 1998, hard rock tragedy struck when FAITH NO MORE announced that they were “no more.”  The breakup of Faith No More allowed for the formation of FANTOMAS!

 

 

14 years ago . . . In 2000, following the orders of gorgeous Attorney General JANET RENO, federal agents raided the home where ELIAN GONZALEZ was hiding, and reunited the boy with his father.

 

 

12 years ago . . . In 2002, “Deep Throat” star LINDA LOVELACE died from injuries she suffered in an April 3rd car crash.  She was only 53.

 

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