Your daily dose of whatever!!
(NC-17) Mimi Faust and Nikko Smith from “Love & Hip Hop: Atlanta” Have a Sex Tape and It’s Going On Sale Next Week
MIMI FAUST and NIKKO SMITH from the reality show “Love & Hip Hop: Atlanta” have a sex tape . . . and it’s going on sale next Monday. The STORY is that the porno company Vivid.com got a hold of it, and got Mimi and Nikko to sign off on it. The producers of “Love & Hip Hop” also gave their blessing. Of course, it’s more likely that this was planned from the beginning.
Serena Williams Is Proud of Her Large Boobs
SERENA WILLIAMS tells “Fitness” magazine, quote, “I’m proud of my large boobs!” She adds, quote, “When I was young I thought I should be built more like an athlete . . . long and lean . . . not with a womanly figure . . . [But] I learned to be proud of my curves and embrace my large boobs. It’s all about loving who you are and realizing that you’re beautiful.”
Sexy Pictures of Famous People
1. (NC-17) KENDALL JENNER was walking around Coachella Sunday wearing a shirt that said, “I Have No [Breasts]”. Of course, instead of breasts, the shirt actually used the word that rhymes with ZITS.
2. (NC-17) So this past Friday was just like any other day for LEONARDO DICAPRIO . . . fooling around with a TOPLESS model on the beach in Bora Bora.
3. RIHANNA had a little bit of a camel toe backstage at the “MTV Movie Awards”.
4. FRANCES BEAN COBAIN was spotted at Coachella Sunday with her fiancé.
5. KENDRA WILKINSON is SOOOO pregnant.
Is Ice Cube Whining That He Lost to Paul Walker at the “MTV Movie Awards”, or is He Just Fooling Around?
ICE CUBE said he was upset that he lost an MTV Movie award to the late PAUL WALKER. He said Walker only won due to SYMPATHY VOTES. But he later said he was kidding . . . quote, “I wasn’t really mad we didn’t win. So I would never diss the actors who won. Not even Paul Walker.”
Billy Joel’s Daughter Collapsed Onstage, But She Did Not Die
ALEXA RAY JOEL . . . the daughter of the divinely handsome BILLY JOEL and the hideously ugly CHRISTIE BRINKLEY . . . collapsed onstage during a performance on Saturday at the Cafe Carlyle in New York City.
She was rushed to the hospital, where she did not die. She was diagnosed with vasovagal syncope . . . which sounds vaguely groin-related, but is actually a condition that blocks blood flow to the brain and causes fainting. No treatment is required for it.
Alexa later issued a statement promising to make up the gig. Her rep also said she hadn’t been feeling well before the show. Alexa is 28 years old.
As Expected, the Ultimate Warrior Died of a Heart Attack
The coroner’s report on the ULTIMATE WARRIOR came in yesterday, and as expected, he died of heart disease. The technical term the coroner used was, “Atherosclerotic / Arteriosclerotic Cardiovascular Disease.”
Warrior’s death was also listed as “natural”, meaning neither drugs nor alcohol were directly involved.
For the First Time Ever, the NBA Playoffs Will Be Without the Lakers, the Celtics and the Knicks
For the first time in the NBA’s 65-year history, the playoffs will be without the L.A. Lakers, the Boston Celtics or the New York Knicks . . . arguably the league’s three most legendary franchises. The Lakers are the biggest upset in this. They’ve only missed the playoffs FIVE TIMES in 65 years.
Michael Phelps Came Out of Retirement . . . Will He Compete in the 2016 Olympics?
MICHAEL PHELPS may have his sights set on another Olympic run, because he’s ending his retirement. He hasn’t explicitly said that he’s gearing up for the 2016 Summer Olympics in Brazil, but that’s what it seems like.
He’s competing in an event in Arizona later this month. It’ll be his first race since he retired after the London Games in 2012 . . . although he’s been training since last fall.
He hasn’t explicitly said that he’s gearing up for the 2016 Summer Olympics in Brazil, but that’s certainly the implication.
Pierce Brosnan Can’t Watch His Old Bond Movies . . . Because He Doesn’t Think He Was Ever “Good Enough” in the Role
PIERCE BROSNAN is not a fan of his four James Bond movies. He says, quote, “I have no desire to watch myself as James Bond. ‘Cause it’s just never good enough. It’s a horrible feeling.”
The “Mad Men” Season Premiere Disappointed in the Ratings
Sunday’s seventh season premiere of “Mad Men” disappointed in the ratings. Around 2.3 million people tuned in, which was the show’s lowest season premiere since Season Two opened to 2.1 million in 2008.
For comparison, the sixth season premiere drew 3.4 million viewers last spring.
Meanwhile, Sunday’s “purple wedding” episode of “Game of Thrones” did well and attracted 6.3 million viewers, which was just barely down from the 6.6 million who tuned in for the fourth season premiere last week.
Tuesday TV Reminders:
• “Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.” . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on ABC. Adrian Pasdar from “Heroes” goes after Coulson’s team.
• “The Voice” . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on NBC. The live playoffs continue.
• “Glee” . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on Fox. Artie finds out he’s contracted V.D. and all the guys get tested for STDs.
• The fourth season premiere of MTV’s “Awkward” . . . from 10:00 to 11:00 P.M.
• The third season premiere of “Celebrity Wife Swap” . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on ABC. Jermaine Jackson’s wife and Daniel Baldwin’s woman exchange places.
• “Celebrities Undercover” . . . 10:30 to 11:00 P.M. on Oxygen. T-Pain infiltrates a group doing celebrity memorabilia and Anthony Anderson pretends to be a chef.
Tonight’s Late Night Talk Shows:
• “The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon” – Jerry Seinfeld, Kristen Wiig, and Lady Gaga. (Repeat)
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” – Andy Samberg, Busy Philipps, and “Broad City” stars Abbi Jacobson and Ilana Glazer. (Repeat)
• “Letterman” – Lady Gaga, Bill Murray, and Martha Stewart. (Repeat)
• “Jimmy Kimmel” – Johnny Depp, Jessica Pare, and Chuck E. Weiss. (Repeat)
• “Carson Daly” – The chicks from “Broad City”. Plus: Jonathan Wilson, and Jason Silva. (Repeat)
• “Arsenio” – Don Cheadle, Billy Dee Williams and his dance partner Emma Slater, and the a capella Naturally 7. (Repeat)
• “Conan” – Nathan Fillion, Tatiana Maslany, and Dan Soder.
• “Craig Ferguson” – Wendie Malick, and Jim Rash.
• “Chelsea Lately” – Marlon Wayans.
• “Jon Stewart” – Pele. (Repeat)
• “The Colbert Report” – Director Darren Aronofsky (Repeat)
“Ride Along” is Out on DVD and “G.I. Joe: Retaliation” is Out on Netflix
Here’s what’s new on DVD today:
• “Ride Along“ . . . comedian Kevin Hart goes on a police ride along to prove he’s worthy of marrying Ice Cube’s sister.
• “The Secret Life of Walter Mitty“ . . . Ben Stiller starts living out some of his heroic fantasies to impress Kristen Wiig.
• “The Nut Job“ stars Will Arnett as a squirrel who robs a nut store in the city after he accidentally destroys everyone’s winter food supply.
• “Philomena“ . . . the Oscar-nominated movie starring Steve Coogan as a journalist helping Judi Dench search for the son taken from her as an unwed teenager.
• “Black Nativity“ . . . Jennifer Hudson sends her teenage son to spend Christmas with her parents, Forest Whitaker and Angela Bassett, in this holiday musical.
• “Date and Switch“ . . . Two guys make a pact to lose their virginity . . . and then one of them comes out of the closet. Dakota Johnson plays the girl who dates them both.
Here’s what’s new in the past week to Netflix Instant Streaming:
• “G.I. Joe: Retaliation“ . . . starring Channing Tatum, The Rock, and Bruce Willis.
• “Insidious Chapter 2“ . . . starring Patrick Wilson and Rose Byrne.
• “Peeples“ . . . starring Kerry Washington, Craig Robinson, and David Alan Grier.
• The History Channel mini-series “The Bible“ . . . and the third season of “Lost Girl”.
And here’s what’s new in video games:
• “Talk Dirty“, Jason Derulo. His guests include Jordin Sparks and Snoop Dogg.
• “Lights Out“, Ingrid Michaelson
• “Time Travelers & Bonfires“, an acoustic Sevendust album.
• “The Both“, the self-titled debut of The Both . . . a.k.a. Aimee Mann and Ted Leo.
• “Beauty in Disrepair“, a solo album from Tonic singer Emerson Hart
• “The Oath“, the debut album from the Swedish rock duo The Oath
• “Homo Erraticus“, Ian Anderson of Jethro Tull
It’s another followup to his “Thick as a Brick” concept albums.
• “Rivers in the Wasteland“, alt rockers Need To Breathe
• “Savages“, the electronic rock band Breathe Carolina
• “Make My Head Sing“, Jessica Lea Mayfield
• “Brave“, Christian pop singer Shawn McDonald
• “Holy Crow“, Christian rockers The Guessing Game
• “Empire of the Undead“, the German power metal band Gamma Ray
• “Testimony“, rapper August Alsina
His guests include Jeezy, B.o.B., and Trey Songz
• “PTSD“, rapper Pharoahe Monch
• “Tarpaper Sky“, country singer Rodney Crowell
• “Put Your Needle Down“, The Secret Sisters
• “Boys Night Out“, the first live album from The Oakridge Boys
• “Beauty Is“, the final album from Ray Price, who passed away last year.
Five Random Facts For Tuesday
Here are a few random facts for you. 98% of Americans eat eggs, but only 7% prefer hard-boiled eggs. And a woman in Thailand got the longest prison sentence in world history back in 1989 . . . she got 141,078 years for running a massive pyramid scheme.
1. 98% of Americans eat eggs . . . but only 7% prefer hard-boiled eggs.
2. When “The Truman Show” was coming out, the director, Peter Weir, wanted to have hidden cameras installed in every theater showing it . . . then have the movie cut to the audience watching it.
3. A woman named Chamoy Thipyaso from Bangkok, Thailand received the longest prison sentence in world history back in 1989 . . . 141,078 years for running a $204 million pyramid scheme. She’s still in prison.
4. ROBERT DOWNEY JR. broke HALLE BERRY’S arm. It was in 2003 when they were filming a scene for the movie “Gothika”. He twisted it too hard, and the filming was shut down for eight weeks while she recovered.
5. Every date this week is a palindrome. Like, today is 4/15/14, which reads the same forwards and backwards.
Only 57% of Married Couples Think Their Marriages Will Last Forever?
According to a new survey, only 57% of married couples think their marriages will last forever. And 21% of people say they’re pretty SURE they’ll get divorced at some point.
Hookers Are Using Airbnb Instead of Hotels to Save Money
Hookers are now using people’s APARTMENTS instead of hotels, because it’s cheaper and more discreet. Supposedly escort services in New York are renting out apartments for up to a week at a time on Airbnb, and using them back-to-back ALL DAY LONG. And one woman who rented her place out in March came home to find all sorts of sex stuff lying around.
The Ten Things Women Stop Wearing Once They Become Mothers
A new survey found 78% of women say they made BIG changes to the way they dressed once they became mothers. The top five things women stop wearing once they become moms are short skirts, high heels, skinny jeans, crop tops, and low-cut shirts.
1. Short skirts.
2. High heels. Mothers wear heels an average of two inches shorter than the heels they wore before.
3. Skinny jeans.
4. Crop tops.
5. Low-cut shirts.
6. Tight dresses.
10. Animal prints.
What’s Something Your Kids Don’t Realize You Know About Them?
What’s something your kids don’t realize you know about them? A few of the best stories we’ve heard are a mom who knows her 13-year-old daughter is putting well-written but steamy ONE DIRECTION fan fiction on the Internet . . . and a parent whose kid doesn’t realize there’s a SMELL after he’s done touching himself.
1. “Another parent heard some kids were teasing my 12-year-old son about never kissing a girl. My son said he HAD kissed a girl, named Ruby. Ruby is our dog. And she really is kissable.”
2. “My 13-year-old daughter has a blog with tens of thousands of followers where she writes ONE DIRECTION fan fiction. It gets kind of steamy . . . but it’s really well-written.”
3. “My son doesn’t realize that when he’s done self-touching, there’s a smell. I know the smell. I also know why sometimes the socks in his laundry have a different texture than other socks.”
4. “I know who she lost her virginity to, when it happened, and where they were. I really wish I didn’t.”
5. “My daughter doesn’t realize I can see what she’s been watching on Netflix. She’s looking for every movie she can find with ‘sex’ in the description.” (Reddit)
The Ten Most Average States in the U.S.
A new study figured out the most AVERAGE states in the U.S., based on the national averages for things like marriage, income, racial breakdowns, and jobs. Illinois turned out to be the most normal state in the country, just ahead of Washington, Oregon, North Carolina, and Indiana.
US Airways Just Made One of the Worst Mistakes in Twitter History . . . and Accidentally Tweeted Hardcore Porn
US Airways made one of the worst mistakes in Twitter history yesterday . . . and accidentally posted a photo of a woman having relations with a toy plane. Apparently someone tweeted the photo to them, and they wanted Twitter to remove it . . . but accidentally pasted it into a tweet. They took it down an hour later and apologized.
Science Has Figured Out Why Airplane Food Never Tastes Good
Scientists have finally figured out why AIRPLANE FOOD never tastes good. Once you get up into high altitudes, your senses DULL . . . and the sense of taste goes first. So when you’re up in the air, NOTHING can taste quite like it would when you’re on the ground.
The Food Network Has Turned Dinner Parties Into Expensive Competitions
There are about seven billion cooking shows on TV now . . . and it’s warping our brains into thinking WE’RE all celebrity chefs too.
A new survey found about one in four people say the Food Network and other food TV shows have turned their dinner parties into very expensive COMPETITIONS.
The average person spends $171 on food for a dinner party . . . and spends six-and-a-half hours trying to prepare gourmet food that will impress their friends. (The Telegraph)
Maisie Williams is 17. Arya Stark on “Game of Thrones”.
Emma Watson is 24. Cute little witch Hermione Granger in the “Harry Potter” movies. She’s also the only woman other than Noah’s wife to survive the flood in “Noah” . . . AND she steals all the water from James Franco and his buddies using nothing but an ax in “This Is the End”.
Annie Costner is 30. Kevin Costner’s more-talented daughter. She starred as the unforgettable Christine in “Dances with Wolves” . . . AND as the scene-stealing Ponytail in “The Postman”.
Alice Braga is 31. Brazilian minx who played Anna, the survivor who rescues Will Smith in “I Am Legend” . . . Frey, the woman who helps Matt Damon in “Elysium” . . . and Isabelle, the sniper who rescues Adrien Brody in “Predators”.
Seth Rogen is 32. Pure animal magnetism. Just ask Katherine Heigl in “Knocked Up” or Elizabeth Banks in “Zack and Miri Make a Porno”. He’s also one of the guys Emma Watson stole water from using nothing but an ax in “This Is the End”.
Danny Pino is 40. Detective Nick Amaro on “Law & Order: SVU”.
Ed O’Brien from Radiohead is 46.
Samantha Fox is 48. British singer of 1987’s “Naughty Girls Need Love Too“ . . . NOT the MATTRESS ACTRESS of the same name. However, she DID like to go topless, as Britain’s most popular “Page 3″ girl EVER.
Emma Thompson is 55. Your children know her as “Nanny McPhee”, the woman who wrote “Mary Poppins” in “Saving Mr. Banks”, and Professor Sybill Trelawney in the “Harry Potter” movies. She also won an Oscar back in 1992 for “Howard’s End”.
Seka is 60. LEGENDARY MATTRESS ACTRESS, known to her fans as The Platinum Princess. Her 217 fine films have included more than 20 “Swedish Erotica” classics as well as “Ready, Willing and Anal”, “Back Door Girls” AND “Blacks and Blondes 54″.
Lois Chiles is 67. Dr. Holly GOODHEAD in the James Bond film “Moonraker”, she also has the distinction of being the only Bond girl to have SEX IN SPACE.
Roy Clark is 81. “HeeHaw” SUPERSTAR.
Elizabeth Montgomery (1933 – 1995) The legendary and super-sexy Samantha Stephens on “Bewitched”. Taken from us much too early by the dirty colorectal cancer.
Dodi Fayed (1955 – 1997) Fallen International Playboy. He used to give it to Princess Diana real good.
Leonardo da Vinci (1452 – 1519)
Countdown to Upcoming Events
• Taxes are Due Today
• 5 days to Easter Sunday
• 8 days to Secretary’s Day
• 26 days to Mother’s Day
• 61 days to Father’s Day
• 1,011 days left of “Hope and Change”
197 years ago . . . In 1817, the first American school for the deaf opened in Hartford, Connecticut. I SAID, IN 1817 THE FIRST AMERICAN SCHOOL FOR THE DEAF OPENED IN HARTFORD, CONNECTICUT!
149 years ago . . . In 1865, ABRAHAM LINCOLN died at 7:22 A.M., and ANDREW JOHNSON was sworn in as the 17th president. Lincoln was the first president to be assassinated. He was shot the night before at Ford’s Theater by actor John Wilkes Booth.
136 years ago . . . In 1878, Harley Procter (THE Procter of Procter & Gamble) developed IVORY SOAP. He got the name from Psalms 45:8 . . . “All their garments smell of myrrh, and aloes, and cassia, out of the ivory palaces, whereby they have made thee glad.”
69 years ago . . . In 1945, PRESIDENT FRANKLIN DELANO ROOSEVELT was buried on the grounds of his Hyde Park home like a pet hamster.
67 years ago . . . In 1947, JACKIE ROBINSON became the first African-American to play in a regular season Major League baseball game.
59 years ago . . . In 1955, RAY KROC opened THE FIRST MCDONALD’S restaurant in Des Plaines, Illinois. Ray Kroc originally sold milkshake machines.
When he saw how much business they made for the McDonald brothers’ restaurant in Southern California, he sold them on the idea of letting him open McDonald’s all across the country.
57 years ago . . . In 1957, JERRY LEE LEWIS released “Whole Lotta Shakin”. It went on to become his first hit. His second “hit” was his 13-year-old cousin.
43 years ago . . . In 1971, GEORGE C. SCOTT refused to accept his Best Actor Oscar for “Patton”, because he said actors shouldn’t be in competition with each other, and because he considered the Academy Awards . . .
Quote, “a two-hour meat parade, a public display with contrived suspense for economic reasons.” Nothing has changed . . . except now it’s a FOUR-hour meat parade.
31 years ago . . . In 1983, “Flashdance” WAS RELEASED! It starred the oddly sexy JENNIFER BEALS and earned the oddly sexy IRENE CARA an Oscar for the song “Flashdance . . . What a Feelin”!
31 years ago . . . In 1983, James L. Hardy Jr. won $25,000 in damages from a lawsuit against DAYS INN. He said he checked into their hotel in East Ridge, Tennessee, went to his room, opened the door, and was shocked to see a “skimpily clad” woman!
He tragically injured his neck when he turned around to leave.
26 years ago . . . In 1988, “Colors” was released . . . starring SEAN PENN as a rookie cop who gets partnered with ROBERT DUVALL in Chicano gang-infested East L.A., es-say.
22 years ago . . . In 1992, the very sexy LEONA HELMSLEY began serving a four-year prison term for tax evasion, because, as she said, “Only the little people pay taxes.”
21 years ago . . . In 1993, the Allen Guttmacher Institute published the results of a new NATIONAL SEX SURVEY.
The most surprising finding was that men who described themselves as exclusively homosexuals made up only 1% of the population . . . but they contribute to 99.9% of all oral acts. Strong work boys!
17 years ago . . . In 1997, CHRISTOPHER REEVE got his star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame.
14 years ago . . . In 2000, “THE FLINTSTONES IN VIVA ROCK VEGAS” was released . . . starring SUPERSTAR STEPHEN BALDWIN AS BARNEY RUBBLE!
13 years ago . . . In 2001, JOEY RAMONE (lead singer of THE RAMONES), died at age 49 from lymphatic cancer.
(Singer Joey, guitarist Johnny and bassist Dee Dee all died early and untimely deaths. Meanwhile, the band’s two drummers . . . Tommy and Marky, are still alive. The Ramones are the ANTI-SPINAL TAP.)
Five years ago . . . In 2009, ERIC CARMEN was sentenced to 180 days in prison for his second DUI in two years. His blood-alcohol level was .234 . . . nearly three times the legal limit. He wisely pled no contest and got off with only having to serve 30 days.