Your daily dose of Whatever!

SHOWBIZ HIGHLIGHTS - 1 of 3

 

 

1.  The nominees for this year's Golden Globe Awards were announced yesterday, and the Michael Keaton movie "Birdman" led the way with seven nominations.  Angelina Jolie got totally shut out on the movie she directed, "Unbroken".  The ceremony airs live on Sunday, January 11th.  (Full Story)

 

 

 

2.  KEIRA KNIGHTLEY is pregnant.  This will be the first child for Keira and her husband JAMES RIGHTON from the rock band THE KLAXONS.  They were married last year.  (Full Story)

 

 

 

3.  Unconfirmed sources say ZOE SALDANA gave birth to her twins on Monday.  They're the first children for Zoe and her husband, artist Marco Perego.  (Full Story)

 

 

 

 

 

 

5.  There may be beef between ABIGAIL BRESLIN and TAYLOR SWIFT . . . because yesterday Abigail seemed to take a shot at Taylor, by Tweeting one of her lyrics from "Blank Space".  But instead of "'Cause darling, I'm a nightmare dressed like a daydream" . . . she said, quote, "'Cause darling, I'm a nightmare dressed like an EMOTIONALLY UNSTABLE CAT LADY."  (Full Story)

 

 

 

6.  Former supermodel BEVERLY JOHNSON claims BILL COSBY drugged her at his home in the mid-1980s.  But he didn't assault her because she became belligerent and started calling him a "mother[effer]".  So he put her in a cab and sent her home.  (Full Story)

 

 

 

SHOWBIZ HIGHLIGHTS - 2 of 3

 

 

7.  ARIANA GRANDE is denying a tabloid report that she has her staff CARRY HER AROUND LIKE A BABY whenever she doesn't feel like walking.  Her rep says the story is FAKE.  But there might be proof that it's not . . . on Ariana's own Instagram feed, where there's a picture of someone carrying her.  (Full Story)

 

 

 

8.  DIMITRI DIATCHENKO . . . an actor who's appeared on shows like "Sons of Anarchy", "Burn Notice", and "Criminal Minds" . . . was arrested for killing, cooking, and eating his ex-girlfriend's pet rabbit.  But Dmitri told a reporter the whole thing was a JOKE.  (Full Story)

 

 

 

9.  Christian Bale hits theaters as Moses this weekend, in the new Ridley Scott movie "Exodus: Gods and Kings".  He'll be up against the Chris Rock comedy "Top Five".  Your limited release options are "Free the Nipple", and a Joaquin Phoenix detective movie called "Inherent Vice".  (New Releases)  (Sneak Peek)

 

 

 

10.  "Left Behind" . . . the Nicolas Cage remake of a Kirk Cameron movie . . . was the worst-reviewed film of 2014.  It just beat out "I, Frankenstein", "The Legend of Hercules", and "Are You Here".  (Full Story)

 

 

 

 

 

 

12.  A list of interesting facts about 2014's biggest singles includes:  Beyoncé considered recording Meghan Trainor's hit "All About That Bass" . . . the choir in the background of Sam Smith's "Stay With Me" is really just his voice layered 20 times . . . and Sia wrote "Chandelier" about her struggles with alcoholism.  (Full Story)

 

 

 

SHOWBIZ HIGHLIGHTS - 3 of 3

 

 

 

 

 

14.  NICKI MINAJ'S new album, "The Pinkprint", has leaked online less than a week before its official release date, which is Tuesday.  One of the songs is called "Feeling Myself" . . . and it's a fairly naughty track featuring BEYONCÉ.  (Full Story)

 

 

 

15.  Urban Quick HitsJeezy, Mary J. Blige, and Chief Keef

 

 

 

16.  "Rolling Stone" released their list of the "40 Best Country Albums of 2014."  MIRANDA LAMBERT's "Platinum" was #1, followed by STURGILL SIMPSON's "Metamodern Sounds in Country Music".  (Full Story)

 

 

 

17.  Raw numbers will determine the winners at Monday's "American Country Countdown Awards".  As one the show's producers put it, quote, "If you sold the most albums, you'll win Album of the Year.  If your song got played the most, [it'll] win Song of the Year."  (Full Story)

 

 

 

18.  Taste of Country asked country stars what celebrity they'd like to kiss under the mistletoe.  Brett Eldredge went with JENNIFER LAWRENCE, and Miranda Lambert said JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE, which is nice . . . but Scotty McCreery, Lee Brice, Randy Houser, and Cole Swindell ALL chose JENNIFER ANISTON.  (Full Story)

 

 

 

 

 

 

SHOWBIZ SEXY - 1 of 2

 

 

Keira Knightley Is Pregnant With Her First Child 

 

 

KEIRA KNIGHTLEY is pregnant.  This will be the first child for Keira and her husband JAMES RIGHTON from the rock band THE KLAXONS.  They were married last year.

 

 

It's just ALL good news for Keira these days.  This week she found out she's up for both a Screen Actors Guild award and a Golden Globe for "The Imitation Game".

 

 

 

 

 

Zoe Saldana Gave Birth to Her Twins . . . We Think 

 

 

We don't have the official word on this yet, but sources say ZOE SALDANA gave birth to her twins on Monday.  They're the first children for Zoe and her husband, artist Marco Perego.

 

 

A so-called "source" says, quote, "They are both ecstatic to be meeting the twins . . . Both want a big family so this is the start."

 

 

 

SHOWBIZ SEXY - 2 of 2

 

 

Sexy Pictures of Famous People 

 

 

1.  SELENA GOMEZ dropped some cleavage on Instagram.  And I was there to pick it up for you.

 

 

 

2.  Should we believe that VICKI GUNVALSON from "The Real Housewives of Orange County" didn't mean to show us her boobs when she took a picture of something shiny and reflective while TOPLESS, then posted the picture on Instagram?

 

 

It does appear that she took it down though, so maybe it really was an accident.

 

 

 

3.  (NC-17)  If you haven't seen "Gone Girl" yet, this is the best look at BEN AFFLECK's peen . . . or at least the section of it that's shown in the movie . . . that you're likely to find online.

 

 

 

4.  A Danish artist painted a replica of the KIM KARDASHIAN butt pic . . . with his PENIS.  I know what you're thinking, but it's actually GOOD.

 

 

 

5.  I'm learning that big, juicy butts don't necessarily look good from every angle.  Right, IGGY?

 

 

 

6.  Why are so many celebrities wearing Quaker Oats Guy hats?

 

 

 

7.  And, in case you missed it, enjoy a photo of BLAKE LIVELY looking sexy in a black dress with her baby bump.

 

 

 

SHOWBIZ NONSENSE - 1 of 3

 

 

Is It On Between Abigail Breslin and Taylor Swift? 

 

 

HIGHLIGHTS:  There may be beef between ABIGAIL BRESLIN and TAYLOR SWIFT . . . because yesterday Abigail seemed to take a shot at Taylor, by Tweeting one of her lyrics from "Blank Space".  But instead of "'Cause darling, I'm a nightmare dressed like a daydream" . . . she said, quote, "'Cause darling, I'm a nightmare dressed like an EMOTIONALLY UNSTABLE CAT LADY."

 

 

FULL STORY:  There may be beef between 18-year-old ABIGAIL BRESLIN and TAYLOR SWIFT . . . because yesterday Abigail seemed to take a shot at Taylor, by Tweeting one of her lyrics from "Blank Space".

 

 

But . . . instead of "'Cause darling, I'm a nightmare dressed like a daydream" . . . Abigail said, quote, "'Cause darling, I'm a nightmare dressed like an EMOTIONALLY UNSTABLE CAT LADY."  (!!!)

 

 

Abigail didn't elaborate, andTaylorhasn't responded.

 

 

Obviously, she could've just been playing around, or maybe she was alluding to herself.  But it could've also been a dis aimed at Taylor. . . because as everyone knows, "a nightmare dressed like an emotionally unstable cat lady" just SCREAMS Taylor Swift.  And it's actually kind of funny.

 

 

And before you write this off, consider this:  A couple weeks ago, Taylorwas Tweeting with Abigail's ex . . . Michael Clifford from 5 Seconds of Summer.

 

 

 

SHOWBIZ NONSENSE - 2 of 3

 

 

Bill Cosby, Meet Accuser Number 25 

 

 

HIGHLIGHTS:  Former supermodel BEVERLY JOHNSON says BILL COSBY drugged her at his home in the mid-1980s.  But he didn't assault her because she became belligerent and started calling him a "mother[effer]".  So he put her in a cab and sent her home.

 

 

FULL STORY:  BILL COSBY reached the quarter-century mark yesterday, when a 25th woman came forward and accused him of inappropriate behavior.

 

 

BEVERLY JOHNSON was a big-time supermodel in the '70s and '80s.  She tells "Vanity Fair" that Bill drugged her at his home in the mid-'80s after asking her over to "audition" for "The Cosby Show".

 

 

Beverlysays Bill gave her a cappuccino . . . and even though she didn't want it, he insisted.  She says, quote, "I knew by the second sip that I'd been drugged . . . and drugged good."

 

 

Bill started putting his arms aroundBeverly's waist, but she was still lucid enough to understand what was going on.  So she started yelling at Bill, repeatedly calling him a "mother[effer]".  He didn't like that, so he decided he was done with her.

 

 

Bill yanked her HARD by the arm, dragged her outside, flagged down a cab, put her in it, and slammed the door.  She blacked out in the taxi and woke up the next morning in her own bed.  She figures the doorman helped put her to bed.

 

 

As for why she never came forward, she said, quote, "In the end, just like the other women, I had too much to lose to go after Bill Cosby."

 

 

 

SHOWBIZ NONSENSE - 3 of 3

 

 

Ariana Grande Denies Making Her Staff Carry Her Around . . . But There Might Be Proof She Does 

 

 

ARIANA GRANDE is denying a recent tabloid report that she makes her staff CARRY HER AROUND LIKE A BABY whenever she doesn't feel like walking.  She was even doing it at the rehearsals for the "Victoria's Secret Fashion Show".

 

 

Ariana's rep says the story is FAKE.  But there might be proof that it's not . . . on Ariana's own Instagram feed.

 

 

A picture Ariana posted 9 months ago shows her being carried.  And the caption says, quote, "Long shoot day yesterday, couldn't walk or keep my eyes open by the time we finished.  Gonna be a beautiful video!"

 

 

 

 

 

A Guy Who Appeared on "Sons of Anarchy" Killed and Ate His Ex-Girlfriend's Rabbit 

 

 

DIMITRI DIATCHENKO . . . an actor who's appeared on shows like "Sons of Anarchy", "Burn Notice", and "Criminal Minds" . . . was arrested for killing, cooking, and eating his ex-girlfriend's pet rabbit.  Oh, and showing her STEP-BY-STEP PICTURES of him doing the deed.

 

 

He also threatened to do the same to HER.  He's up on charges of animal cruelty and making criminal threats.  He faces more than four years in prison if convicted.

 

 

But Dmitri told a reporter the whole thing was a HOAX.  He says he bought rabbit meat, and set the REAL bunny free.

 

 

 

NEW MOVIES THIS WEEKEND - 1 of 2

 

 

New in Theaters:  Christian Bale in "Exodus" and Chris Rock in "Top Five"

 

 

 

 

Ridley Scott . . . the guy who did "Gladiator" and "Alien" . . . directs this retelling of the story of Moses.  It stars Christian Bale as the leader of a revolution to free the slaves ofEgypt and return them to the land of their ancestors.

 

 

Joel Edgerton plays pharaoh Ramses the Second.  He goes from being raised as a brother to Moses . . . to being a jealous rival for their father's favor . . . and sworn enemy once Moses returns from exile to turn his own people against him.

 

 

Ben Kingsley reveals the truth to Moses about his bloodline, Aaron Paul is their slave friend Joshua, Sigourney Weaver plays Ramses' mother, and an 11-year-old boy is the messenger of God when they get to the part about the burning bush.

 

 

(And if you're into "Game of Thrones", you may recognize the High Priestess and Moses' sister.  The woman who played Oberyn Martell's mistress Ellaria Sand is the priestess, and Stannis Baratheon's wife is in this as Miram.)

 

 

 

2.  "Top Five"  (R)  Trailer

 

 

Chris Rock wrote, directed, and stars in this movie about a guy who gave up comedy to star in movies that are getting slammed by the critics.  It also stars Rosario Dawson as a "New York Times" reporter following him around to cover his latest effort to be taken seriously . . . and his impending wedding to a reality star played by Gabrielle Union.

 

 

The rest of the cast includes Kevin Hart, Cedric the Entertainer, and "Saturday Night Live's" Leslie Jones, Jay Pharoah, and Tracy Morgan.  The movie was produced by Jay-Z and Kanye West . . . And Questlove from the Roots was in charge of the music.

 

 

 

NEW MOVIES THIS WEEKEND - 2 of 2

 

 

3.  "Inherent Vice"  (R)  Trailer  (Limited)  Opening nationwide January 9th.

 

 

Joaquin Phoenix and a set of fake '70s sideburns play a private investigator asked by his ex-girlfriend to stop a plot to kidnap her rich boyfriend and lock him in the looney bin.

 

 

Eric Roberts is the intended target, Josh Brolin is a cop who gets involved once he goes missing, and Reese Witherspoon plays a Deputy D.A.  Owen Wilson, Benicio del Toro, and Jena Malone from "The Hunger Games" movies are also in it.

 

 

 

4.  "Free the Nipple"  (These Breasts Are Not Yet Rated)  Trailer  (Limited)

 

 

This movie's inspired by a group of women who went topless on the streets ofNew York Cityto fight for their GOD-GIVEN RIGHT to bare their breasts in public.

 

 

It's actually legal for ladies to expose their chest ornaments inNew York. . . and it has been since 1992 . . . but the cops will still arrest you for it.

 

 

You probably got your first exposure to the Free the Nipple campaign courtesy of the whorish antics of Miley Cyrus.  However, the movement is actually more about gender equality than it is about letting celebrity skanks act like harlots on stage.

 

 

See, it's illegal in 35 states for a woman to be topless, even for something as innocent and natural as breastfeeding.  And according to FreeTheNipple.com, an exposed nipple can even get you THREE YEARS in jail in places like Louisiana.

 

 

(Here's a great photo of the Top 15 Reasons to Free the Nipple.  Some of them include how it was considered obscene for men to be shirtless until 80 years ago . . . that breasts are NOT sex organs, and their primary purpose is to feed babies . . . and that as recent as 50 years ago, even a BIKINI was considered obscene.)

 

 

 

NEW RELEASE SNEAK PEEK

 

 

Sneak Peek at Upcoming CD, DVD, and Theatrical Releases

 

 

Theatrical Releases for Next Friday:

 

"The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies" . . . starring Martin Freeman.

"The Night at the Museum: Secret of the Tomb" . . . starring Ben Stiller.

"Annie" . . . starring Jamie Foxx and Quvenzhane Wallis.

"The Gambler" . . . starring Mark Wahlberg.

 

 

 

DVDs for Tuesday:

 

"Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles" . . . starring Megan Fox as April O'Neill.

"The Maze Runner" . . . starring Dylan O'Brien from "Teen Wolf".

"Magic in the Moonlight" . . . starring Colin Firth and Emma Stone.

"This is Where I Leave You" . . . starring Tina Fey and Jason Bateman.

 

 

 

CDs for Tuesday:

 

"Sucker", Charli XCX

"The Pink Print", Nicki Minaj

"Dark Side of the Mule", Gov't Mule

• The "Peter Pan Live" soundtrack

 

 

 

MOVIE QUICK HITS - 1 of 2

 

 

Are These the 10 Worst Movies of the Year? 

 

 

HIGHLIGHTS:  "Left Behind" . . . the Nicolas Cage remake of a Kirk Cameron movie . . . was the worst-reviewed film of 2014.  It just beat out "I, Frankenstein", "The Legend of Hercules", and "Are You Here".

 

 

FULL STORY:  It's award season, which means everyone else is focusing on the BEST that cinema had to offer.  So we're going to sniff around at the OTHER end of the spectrum.

 

 

Here are the 10 Worst-Reviewed Movies of the Year, based on their ratings on RottenTomatoes.com . . .

 

 

1.  "Left Behind":  2% positive rating.  Nicolas Cage remaking a Kirk Cameron movie about the Rapture?  What could go wrong?

 

 

2.  "I, Frankenstein":  3% positive rating.  The Frankenstein monster as an action hero?  Why?

 

 

3.  "The Legend of Hercules":  3% positive rating.  This wasn't the major studio release starring The Rock.  This one featured Kellan Lutz in the title role.

 

 

Continued . . .

 

 

 

MOVIE QUICK HITS - 2 of 2

 

 

Are These the 10 Worst Movies of the Year?  (continued) 

 

 

4.  "Are You Here":  7% positive rating.  It's a family comedy-drama starring Zach Galifianakis, Owen Wilson and Amy Poehler.

 

 

5.  "A Haunted House 2":  8% positive rating.  Another one of those Wayans Brothers horror parodies.

 

 

6.  "Grace of Monaco":  9% positive rating.  Nicole Kidman as the late Grace Kelly.

 

 

7.  "Vampire Academy":  9% positive rating.  Based on a young adult book series about a world where good and evil vampires are at odds.

 

 

8.  "The Nut Job":  10% positive rating.  An animated flick about a squirrel voiced by Will Arnett.

 

 

9.  "Winter's Tale":  13% positive rating.  Colin Farrell plays a would-be thief who falls for a dying woman who has the power of reincarnation . . . or something like that.

 

 

10.  "Blended":  14% positive rating.  Another Adam Sandler / Drew Barrymore romantic comedy.  What did you expect?

 

 

(Check out the 19 worst-reviewed movies here.  The full list includes the new "Transformers" flick and ANOTHER Nicolas Cage movie.  We're not sure why the Kirk Cameron movie "Saving Christmas" failed to make this list.  But we'd just heard earlier this week that it has a ZERO rating on Rotten Tomatoes.)

 

 

 

 

 

TV REMINDERS

 

 

Weekend TV Reminders:

 

 

• Friday:  The series premiere of "Wake Up Call" at 9:00 P.M. on TNT.  The Rock hosts this show where real people are given a second chance to turn their lives around, the same way he did when he overcame an eviction and multiple arrests.

 

 

It's from the producers of "The Biggest Loser" and "Extreme Makeover: Home Edition".  In the first episode, a teenager is given a shot at becoming an MMA fighter . . . if he readjusts his attitude and finish high school.

 

 

• Saturday:  "Santa Sent Me to the ER" . . . from 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on TLC.  Christmas-related injuries are showcased.

 

 

"Saturday Night Live" . . . from 11:30 P.M. to 1:00 A.M. on NBC.  Martin Freeman from "The Hobbit" hosts and Charli XCX performs.

 

 

"Sunday Night Football" . . . from 5:30 to 8:30 P.M. Eastern on NBC.  The Philadelphia Eagles host the Dallas Cowboys.

 

 

• Sunday:  The sixth season premiere of "Undercover Boss" . . . from 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on CBS.  The president and CEO of True Value hardware works undercover.

 

 

• Sunday:  The SERIES FINALE of "The Newsroom" . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on HBO.

 

 

• Sunday:  "The 10 Most Fascinating People of 2014" . . . from 9:00 to 11:00 P.M. on ABC.  The "fascinating" people on this latest edition include Neil Patrick Harris, Oprah, Chelsea Handler, Scarlett Johansson and Taylor Swift.

 

 

(You can preview Monday's schedule here.)

 

 

 

TODAY ON TV TALK SHOWS

 

 

Tonight's Late Night Talk Shows:

 

 

"The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon" - Orlando Bloom, and Megan Mullally.

 

 

"Late Night with Seth Meyers" - Jason Sudeikis and Aubrey Plaza.  (Repeat)

 

 

"Letterman" - Jamie Foxx, Robert Klein, and Dan Penn.

 

 

"Jimmy Kimmel" - Sofia Vergara, and J.K. Simmons.  (Repeat)

 

 

"Carson Daly" - Isabella Rossellini, the Acid, and Jessimae Peluso.  (Repeat)

 

 

"Craig Ferguson" - Rashida Jones, and DJ Qualls.

 

 

(You can preview Monday's late night schedule here.)

 

 

 

MUSIC QUICK HITS - 1 of 5

 

 

14 Things You May Not Have Known About 2014's Biggest Songs 

 

 

HIGHLIGHTS:  A list of interesting facts about 2014's biggest singles includes:  Beyoncé considered recording Meghan Trainor's hit "All About That Bass" . . . the choir in the background of Sam Smith's "Stay With Me" is really just his voice layered 20 times . . . and Sia wrote "Chandelier" about her struggles with alcoholism.

 

 

FULL STORY:  Someone compiled a list of interesting facts about this year's biggest singles . . . and here are the highlights:

 

 

1.  Beyoncé considered recording Meghan Trainor's hit "All About That Bass".

 

 

2.  The choir in the background of Sam Smith's "Stay With Me" is really just his voice layered 20 times.

 

 

3.  Charli XCX wrote "Boom Clap" for Hilary Duff but was told it wasn't "cool enough" for her.

 

 

4.  The Ying Yang Twins recorded a verse for Ariana Grande's song "Problem" before she insisted producers reach out to Iggy Azalea.

 

 

5.  Iggy Azalea and Rita Ora's collaboration "Black Widow" was written by Katy Perry.

 

 

6.  While shooting the music video for Taylor Swift's "Shake If Off", producers played heavy metal music outside the soundstage to prevent anyone from hearing the song before its release.

 

 

Continued . . .

 

 

 

MUSIC QUICK HITS - 2 of 5

 

 

14 Things You May Not Have Known About 2014's Biggest Songs  (continued)  

 

 

7.  While the line "If you want, you can pet on my Harley" from Florida Georgia Line's "Sun Daze" sounds dirty, it's really a reference to Tyler Hubbard's dog.  He has a golden retriever named Harley.

 

 

8.  With "Birthday", Katy Perry wanted to write a song that sounded like '90s Mariah Carey.

 

 

9.  Sia wrote "Chandelier" about her struggles with alcoholism.

 

 

10.  "Therapy" is one of four songs Sam Smith helped Mary J. Blige write.

 

 

11.  Taylor Swift became the first female artist to replace herself at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 chart when "Blank Space" overtook "Shake It Off" for the top spot.

 

 

12.  Miranda Lambert bought Carrie Underwood a motorcycle as a thank you present for dueting on "Somethin' Bad".

 

 

13.  5 Seconds of Summer's hit "Amnesia" was co-written by Benji and Joel Madden.

 

 

14.  Pitbull was featured on the album version of Jennifer Lopez's "Booty" only to be replaced by Iggy Azalea on the single.

 

 

(There are more in this Buzzfeed article, although some of them are lame.)

 

 

 

MUSIC QUICK HITS - 3 of 5

 

 

Several Rock and Metal "Best of 2014" Lists 

 

 

1.  "Rolling Stone" has put out a list of the "20 Best Metal Albums of 2014" . . . and they gave the #1 spot to Yob's "Clearing the Path to Ascend"Triptykon's "Melana Chasmata" and "At War with Reality" by At the Gates are second and third, respectively.

 

 

 

2.  A new Loudwire.com list of the "Best Metal Videos of 2014" is led by Behemoth's "Blow Your Trumpets Gabriel", Das Muerte's "All Those Delicate Cuts", and Machine Head's "Now We Die".

 

 

 

3.  Loudwire (also) has a list of the "Best Rock Videos of 2014", and Monster Magnet's "The Duke" is #1 . . . followed by Five Finger Death Punch's "Wrong Side of Heaven" and Seether's "Same Damn Life".

 

 

 

4.  A list of "The Top 25 Underrated Alternative Hits from 2014" is topped by "Algiers" by The Afghan WhigsAlt-J's "Hunger of the Pine" is second, followed by Band of Skulls' "I Feel Like Ten Men, Nine Dead, and One Dying" . . . and What Moon Things' "Doesn't Make Much Sense".

 

 

 

MUSIC QUICK HITS - 4 of 5

 

 

(NC-17) Nicki Minaj's New Album Has Leaked Online . . . Check Out Her Naughty Song with Beyoncé 

 

 

NICKI MINAJ'S new album, "The Pinkprint", has leaked online . . . just under a week before its official release date, which is Tuesday.

 

 

One of the songs off the album is called "Feeling Myself" . . . and it's a fairly naughty track featuring BEYONCÉ, who drops this line about the surprise album she released last December . . .

 

 

Quote, "Changed the game with that digital drop.  Know where you was when that digital popped.  I stopped the world."

 

 

(Last we checked, you could find a PARTIALLY censored version, here.  Despite that, you don't want to play it on the air as is.  There's a lot of sexual innuendo, and a line about male self-pleasure with the words "[blank] off.")

 

 

(Nicki also drops the line, quote "And I'm feelin' myself, jack rabbit."  The Jack Rabbit is a NAUGHTY BEDROOM ENHANCER.)

 

 

 

MUSIC QUICK HITS - 5 of 5

 

 

Urban Quick Hits:  Jeezy, Mary J. Blige, and Chief Keef 

 

 

1.  JEEZY is off the hook on the felony weapons charges he was hit with back in August.  A judge dismissed the charges yesterday, citing a lack of evidence.

 

 

In a statement, Jeezy said, quote, "I pray [the arrest] had nothing to do with race but it definitely had nothing to do with evidence.  I knew that the allegations and charges were based on zero facts.  I'm relieved that the truth has prevailed."

 

 

 

2.  "Billboard" has a new list of "The 10 Best R&B Albums of 2014."  MARY J. BLIGE'S critically acclaimed new album "The London Sessions" is #1 . . . followed by Jessie Ware's "Tough Love" and Tinashe's "Aquarius".

 

And here's their "10 Best R&B Songs" list, which is topped by Tinashe's "2 On".

 

 

 

3.  Months after being dropped from Interscope, CHIEF KEEF is releasing his album, "Nobody", next week.  KANYE WEST is reportedly featured on the title track.

 

 

 

 

FRIDAY'S SHOWBIZ EXTRAS

 

 

1.  EMILY RATAJKOWSKI from the "Blurred Lines" video is nailing some musician guy who is NOT on her level.  (Full Story)

 

 

2.  Are GWYNETH PALTROW and CHRIS MARTIN still getting it on?  (Full Story)

 

 

3.  KIM JONG UN isn't the only ruthless dictator DENNIS RODMAN digs.  He also thinks VLADIMIR PUTIN is a "cool guy".  (Full Story)

 

 

4.  KEVIN HART responded to that leaked Sony email in which an exec called him a WHORE.

 

 

Meanwhile, a new document has leaked in which that exec and the producer who hated on Angelina Jolie joked about PRESIDENT OBAMA only liking all the black movies.  (Full Story)

 

 

Related Comedy:  In leaked emails, a Sony executive and a producer joked about President Obama preferring black movies.  Although they stopped short of saying he would enjoy "Madea" movies.  I mean, they're not MONSTERS.

 

 

5.  The names of the characters in that new "Star Wars" trailer have been revealed.  FYI, that little ball-robot is called BB-8.  (Full Story)

 

 

6.  Last night on "Letterman", CHRIS ROCK joked about how he was passed over as Dave's replacement.  Or WAS he joking?  (Video)

 

 

7.  RICK SPRINGFIELD has joined the cast of "True Detective 2".  (Full Story)

 

 

8.  JOHN LYDON of the SEX PISTOLS says the guys in the band are too fat to reunite.  (Full Story)

 

 

 

STUPID NEWS HIGHLIGHTS - 1 of 3

 

 

1.  Here are a few random facts for you.  More than 1,000 Americans have gotten the PLAGUE over the past 100 years.  The U.S. Marine Corps is one year older than the U.S. itself.  And there are 43 buildings in Manhattan that have their own Zip code.  (Full Story)

 

 

 

2.  According to a new survey, 85% of people say hosting Christmas is stressful . . . 14% of those people say it's more stressful than MOVING . . . and 10% say it's more stressful than planning a wedding.  Also, 39% of people are worried they bought lame presents.  (Full Story)

 

 

 

3.  Here's a strategy to avoid overeating at holiday dinners when you have a host who won't take "I'm full" for an answer.  The best thing you can do is say how good the food is and ask for seconds.  But when you DO take seconds, just take small portions . . . the host will just be happy you wanted more.  (Full Story)

 

 

 

4.  Apparently, a new trend this Christmas is putting tiny ornaments in your BEARD.  There's even a company selling ornaments specifically for beards . . . but they're SOLD OUT.  (Full Story)

 

 

 

5.  According to a new survey, the number one reason men and women both give for NOT dating someone is . . .  "they're just not my type."  For women, that's followed by a guy being arrogant, rude, unattractive, or cheap.  For men it's followed by a woman being rude, selfish, arrogant, or unattractive.  (Full Story)

 

 

 

STUPID NEWS HIGHLIGHTS - 2 of 3

 

 

6.  A recent survey asked women for the most ridiculous ways guys have ruined a date.  Some of the best answers include, "He talked about his most recent bowel movement" . . . "He asked me to help him take a bunch of stuff to the dump" . . . and "He brought his mom with him, and talked about what a special relationship they have."  (Full Story)

 

 

 

7.  Pornhub.com just released a ton of data on which countries and U.S. states last the longest and shortest watching porn.  People in Western Sahara last the longest . . . people in Iraq are the shortest.  For states, Hawaii lasts the longest and Arizona is the shortest.  (Full Story)

 

 

 

8.  What are the most DISAPPOINTING travel destinations?  Some of the top picks are Los Angeles, which is just sprawling with not that much for tourists to do . . . the pyramids in Egypt, which aren't as impressive in person as you think . . . and Stonehenge, which is smaller than you think.  (Full Story)

 

 

 

9.  A 25-year-old woman in England developed a strange habit when she was pregnant last year . . . she started eating TOILET PAPER.  And now she eats about a roll a day.  She has a condition called Pica, where people crave things that aren't food . . . they're most likely to develop when women are pregnant.  (Full Story)

 

 

 

10.  A dog literally ate a kid's homework last week . . . and almost died.  A high school student in Texas made a model of a farm from the Middle Ages, and her dog ate some plastic farm animals and metal wire fences off it.  Luckily they got him to emergency surgery to get it out, and saved his life.  (Full Story)

 


STUPID NEWS HIGHLIGHTS - 3 of 3

 

 

11.  A 55-year-old woman in Tennessee was annoyed that a dog was chasing her cat on Wednesday . . . so she grabbed her gun and tried to SHOOT it.  But she accidentally shot HERSELF in the hand.  It looks like she won't be charged with a crime.  (Full Story)

 

 

 

12.  A couple in Washington D.C. wanted to get revenge on the guy who's been stealing packages off their front porch, and help the cops catch him.  So they took an Amazon box . . . filled it up with DOG POOP . . . then put it on their porch as bait with a camera pointed at it.  He stole it on Monday, and now the cops have the footage.  (Full Story)

 

 

 

13.  Last week, a guy stole 12 industrial-sized heating units from the top of a strip mall in Delaware.  Then while police were setting up a press conference about it, he pulled up in the same car they'd seen in security footage.  Now he's facing charges for felony theft and criminal mischief.  (Full Story)

 

 

 

14.  On Wednesday, a 92-year-old in Florida lost control of his car, drove into a lake, and lost consciousness.  Luckily, a 21-year-old pre-med student was having lunch across the street . . . pulled him from the car . . . did CPR . . . and saved his life.  (Full Story)

 

 

 

STUPID NEWS - 1 of 11

 

 

Five Random Facts For Friday

 

 

HIGHLIGHTS:  Here are a few random facts for you.  More than 1,000 Americans have gotten the PLAGUE over the past 100 years.  The U.S. Marine Corps is one year older than theU.S. itself.  And there are 43 buildings inManhattan that have their own ZIP code.

 

 

FULL STORY:  Here are some random facts for you . . .

 

 

1.  More than 1,000 Americans have gotten the PLAGUE over the past 100 years . . . an average of about ten a year.  Only about 16% die from it today, though.

 

 

2. Mount Rushmorewas supposed to show all four presidents down to their waists . . . but they ran out of funds in 1941 so we just get the heads.

 

 

3.  The U.S. Marine Corps is one year older than theU.S.itself . . . the Marines were founded in 1775.

 

 

4.  There are 43 buildings inManhattanthat have their own ZIP code.

 

 

5.  The animators doing "Aladdin" based the movement of his pants off MC HAMMER'S pants.

 

 

 

 


STUPID NEWS - 2 of 11

 

 

14% of People Say Hosting Christmas Is More Stressful Than Moving

 

 

HIGHLIGHTS:  According to a new survey, 85% of people say hosting Christmas is stressful . . . 14% of those people say it's more stressful than MOVING . . . and 10% say it's more stressful than planning a wedding.  Also, 39% of people are worried they bought lame presents.

 

 

FULL STORY:  Hosting Christmas seems like a good idea . . . you won't have to drive all over the place AND you can drink away the pain.  But as it gets closer . . . you realize what a TERRIBLE idea it actually was.

 

 

A new survey found 85% of people think that hosting Christmas is stressful.

 

 

Of those people, 14% say it's more stressful than MOVING . . . and 10% say it's more stressful than planning a wedding.

 

 

And that's not the only stress around Christmas . . . a separate survey found 39% of people are worried that they bought TERRIBLE GIFTS.

 

 

And it's probably true . . . the average person gets TWO gifts per year they don't actually like.  57% return the gifts or throw them away . . . 19% regift them.

 

 

 

 

 

STUPID NEWS - 3 of 11

 

 

Here's How to Avoid Overeating When You're a Dinner Guest

 

 

HIGHLIGHTS:  Here's a strategy to avoid overeating at holiday dinners when you have a host who won't take "I'm full" for an answer.  The best thing you can do is say how good the food is and ask for seconds.  But when you DO take seconds, just take small portions . . . the host will just be happy you wanted more.

 

 

FULL STORY:  This is the time of year for OVEREATING . . . partly because your relatives are INSULTED if you don't leave their house ten pounds heavier than when you walked in.

 

 

Brian Wansink is the author of a book called "Slim by Design", and he has the best strategy to avoid overeating when you're a dinner guest, and the host won't take "No thanks, I'm full" for an answer.

 

 

The best thing you can do is . . . say how good the food is and ask for seconds.  Then when you DO take seconds, just take really small portions.

 

 

The person hosting the dinner won't really pay attention to how much food you took . . . they'll just know you went for seconds.  And that'll keep them from pressuring you to eat more than you want.

 

 

And yes . . . needing a strategy to eat less is pretty much the definition of a "first world problem."

 

 

 

 


STUPID NEWS - 4 of 11

 

 

Putting Ornaments in Your Beard Is a Trend This Christmas?

 

 

HIGHLIGHTS:  Apparently, a new trend this Christmas is putting tiny ornaments in your BEARD.  There's even a company selling ornaments specifically for beards . . . but they're SOLD OUT.

 

 

FULL STORY:  Now hipsters are ruining CHRISTMAS.

 

 

Apparently a new trend this Christmas is . . . putting tiny ornaments in your BEARD.

 

 

Of course, to have a beard bushy enough to support ornaments, you would've had to start growing it a while ago.  Which should be fine if you're a filthy hipster, or you're still rocking some facial hair from "Mo-vember."

 

 

There's a company that's even selling ornaments specifically for beards . . . but they say demand has been so high they're already SOLD OUT.

 

 

You can still join in though . . . you'll just have to buy miniature ornaments, hook them onto your beard yourself, and be the HIT at your holiday parties.

 

 

(Adweek

 

 

(Here are a few photos of guys with ornaments in their beards.)

 

 


STUPID NEWS - 5 of 11

 

 

The Number One Reason for Not Dating Someone Is . . . "They're Just Not My Type"

 

 

HIGHLIGHTS:  According to a new survey, the number one reason men and women both give for NOT dating someone is . . .  "they're just not my type."  For women, that's followed by a guy being arrogant, rude, unattractive, or cheap.  For men it's followed by a woman being rude, selfish, arrogant, or unattractive.

 

 

FULL STORY:  "They're just not my type" seems like the lamest excuse for not dating someone.  But according to a new survey, it's the number one turnoff for men AND women.

 

 

The rest of the top five are a little more specific.  Women's biggest turnoffs are when a guy's arrogant, rude, unattractive, or cheap.  For men it's when a woman's rude, selfish, arrogant, or unattractive.

 

 

Researchers also asked for the top five things people DO that can ruin a date.  Women said guys shouldn't be too touchy-feely . . . too serious . . . drink too much . . . swear too much . . . or come across as shy.

 

 

Men don't want a woman who's too serious . . . swears too much . . . seems too shy . . . smokes . . . or seems too EXCITED about the date.

 

 

As far as conversations go, our biggest turnoffs include only talking about yourself . . . talking about an ex . . . not talking ENOUGH . . . not asking questions . . . talking too much about people only you know . . . and talking about money.

 

 

And 63% of people also said they've been on at least one date that was a complete "disaster".  (Vimbly)

 

 

 

STUPID NEWS - 6 of 11

 

 

What's the Most Ridiculous Thing That's Happened to You on a Date?

 

 

HIGHLIGHTS:  A recent survey asked women for the most ridiculous ways guys have ruined a date.  Some of the best answers include, "He talked about his most recent bowel movement" . . . "He asked me to help him take a bunch of stuff to the dump" . . . and "He brought his mom with him, and talked about what a special relationship they have."

 

 

FULL STORY:  Ladies, have you ever been on a date with a guy who did something RIDICULOUS to ruin it?  A recent survey asked women that . . . here are the seven best answers.

 

 

1.  "He tried to start a conversation about his most recent BOWEL MOVEMENT."

 

 

2.  "He talked about his dead wife . . . and said she was probably there in spirit, critiquing me."

 

 

3.  "Someone sitting next to us told me he'd dated their sister AND their mom."

 

 

4.  "He was bald . . . but sat there pretending to nervously play with his hair."

 

 

5.  "He bragged about the new steering wheel he'd just bought for his car . . . then it came off while we were driving."

 

 

6.  "He brought me to his place . . . then loaded up a bunch of trash and asked me to go to the DUMP with him."

 

 

7.  "He brought his MOM, and talked the whole time about what a special relationship they have."  (Vimbly)

 

 

 

STUPID NEWS - 7 of 11

 

 

Which Countries, States, and Cities Last Longest When They're Watching Porn?

 

 

HIGHLIGHTS:  Pornhub.com just released a ton of data on which countries andU.S. states last the longest and shortest watching porn.  People in Western Sahara last the longest . . . people inIraq are the shortest.  For states,Hawaii lasts the longest andArizona is the shortest.

 

 

FULL STORY:  Pornhub.com just released a ton of data all focused on one thing:  How long people watch porn on their site before . . . um . . . they no longer have any need to keep on watching.  We dug through it and here are the five highlights . . .

 

 

1.  The country where people watch the longest is . . .Western Sahara, at 16 minutes and 16 seconds.  Other countries that last over 14 minutes areTogo,Djibouti,Burkina Faso,China, and thePhilippines.

 

 

2.  The country where people take care of business quickest is . . .Iraq, at just five minutes and 30 seconds.  In fact, almost all of the countries that clock in under seven minutes are in the Middle East and Eastern Europe . . . plusCuba.

 

 

3.  TheU.S.takes an average of 10 minutes and 17 seconds, which is right in the middle of the pack worldwide.

 

 

4.  TheU.S.state with the longest time isHawaii, at 11 minutes and 26 seconds. ArkansasandMississippialso last over 11 minutes. Arizonais done fastest, at nine minutes and 21 seconds . . .Illinoisis next fastest, at nine minutes and 36 seconds.

 

 

5.  For individual American cities, the people in Mountain View, California. . . home of Google . . . somehow last 21 minutes and eight seconds.  Plainview, Nebraskais the fastest, at four minutes and 37 seconds.  (Pornhub(You can dig into the world and U.S. maps here.)

 

 

 

STUPID NEWS - 8 of 11

 

 

The Five Most Disappointing Travel Destinations

 

 

HIGHLIGHTS:  What are the most DISAPPOINTING travel destinations?  Some of the top picks areLos Angeles, which is just sprawling with not that much for tourists to do . . . the pyramids inEgypt, which aren't as impressive in person as you think . . . andStonehenge, which is smaller than you think.

 

 

FULL STORY:  We all have these images in our minds of the exotic places we want to visit . . . images that are mainly from movies and professional photographs, which make them look AMAZING.  Unfortunately, they're NOT always amazing.

 

 

Here's a list of the five most DISAPPOINTING travel destinations in the world, according to votes on Reddit.com . . .

 

 

1. Los Angeles.  It's just a big sprawl with no center, and surprisingly little for tourists to do . . . other than sit in traffic.

 

 

2.  The pyramids inEgypt.  They're so close to the city ofGizathat it's noisy and chaotic, the insides are disappointing in person, and you're constantly harassed by locals trying to sell things.

 

 

3. Stonehenge.  It's anticlimactic . . . you can't get very close to it, it's smaller than you think, and it's really a long trip to get to from London.

 

 

4. Paris.  The rudeness toward tourists is NOT exaggerated.

 

 

5. Venice,Italy.  It's mostly an overpriced tourist trap, and the canals are polluted.

 

 

Some of the other candidates that just missed the top five are Dubai. . . Jamaica. . . Bali . . . Niagara Falls . . . Times Square. . . and the Taj Mahal.  (Yahoo)

 

 

 

STUPID NEWS - 9 of 11

 

 

Meet the Woman Who Eats a Full Roll of Toilet Paper Every Day

 

 

HIGHLIGHTS:  A 25-year-old woman inEngland developed a strange habit when she was pregnant last year . . . she started eating TOILET PAPER.  And now she eats about a roll a day.  She has a condition called Pica, where people crave things that aren't food . . . it's most likely to develop when women are pregnant.

 

 

FULL STORY:  There's a 25-year-old woman inGainsborough,England named Jade Sylvester, who developed a REALLY strange habit when she was pregnant with her son last year.

 

 

She says, quote, "Two months into the pregnancy, I started craving toilet paper.  I still don't know why.  I like the feeling of the texture in my mouth, rather than the taste.  I like the dryness."

 

 

And now, even though she gave birth and isn't pregnant anymore . . . she still LOVES eating toilet paper.   She eats up to a roll every day.  Fortunately she prefers the taste of the cheap stuff, not the more expensive brands.

 

 

There's a medical term for what Jade's doing . . . it's a condition called Pica.  That's when someone has a craving to eat something that's not food . . . and it's most likely to develop when women are pregnant.

 

 

Jade's not sure exactly what it's doing to her body.  Quote, "It can't be doing my insides any good, but it hasn't caused me any health problems or any illness."

 

 

And she's right . . . eating things that aren't food can cause your body to have problems getting nutrients, which can cause long-term issues.  (Lincolnshire Echo(Here's a photo of Jade with a roll of toilet paper.)

 

 

 

STUPID NEWS - 10 of 11

 

 

A Dog Eats a Kid's Homework . . . and Almost Dies

 

 

HIGHLIGHTS:  A dog literally ate a kid's homework last week . . . and almost died.  A high school student inTexas made a model of a farm from the Middle Ages, and her dog ate some plastic farm animals and metal wire fences off it.  Luckily they got him to emergency surgery to get it out, and saved his life.

 

 

FULL STORY:  A dog inTexas actually ate a kid's homework last week . . . I guess it had to happen for real at least ONCE.

 

 

Reagan Hardin is a student atMagnoliaWestHigh SchoolinHouston,Texas.  And last week, she had to make a model of a farm manor from the Middle Ages for a history project.

 

 

She put some little model buildings on a piece of green felt, along with plastic farm animals and some metal wire fences.  Then she left the project out.

 

 

Well . . . the family's five-year-old mixed breed dog Roscoe saw it, and started EATING it.

 

 

Fortunately, Reagan's mom figured out what happened, and took Roscoe to the vet.  He needed emergency surgery to get everything out of his stomach and save his life.

 

 

Reagan wound up having to redo the project . . . we're assuming her teacher gave her an extension.  (Houston Press)

 

 

(Here are photos of the project, Roscoe, and the X-ray of his stomach.)

 

 

 

STUPID NEWS - 11 of 11

 

 

A Woman Tries to Shoot a Dog Chasing Her Cat . . . and Accidentally Shoots Herself

 

 

HIGHLIGHTS:  A 55-year-old woman inTennessee was annoyed that a dog was chasing her cat on Wednesday . . . so she grabbed her gun and tried to SHOOT it.  But she accidentally shot HERSELF in the hand.  It looks like she won't be charged with a crime.

 

 

FULL STORY:  The war between dogs and cats has been going on since long before any of us were around.  So when you try to interfere, you're just a footnote in an epic battle much larger than you.

 

 

55-year-old Freda Harwell ofMurfreesboro,Tennesseewoke up early Wednesday morning and found a dog chasing her cat in the backyard.  And she handled it in the standard American way . . . by grabbing a GUN.

 

 

Then she started chasing the dog who was chasing her cat . . . but when she tried to SHOOT it, she accidentally shot HERSELF in the left hand.

 

 

She went to the hospital for treatment, but it looks like she's not being charged with a crime.

 

 

We don't know what happened with the dog and the cat in the end, but we're assuming the cat got away . . . just like cats always have throughout history.

 

 

 

 

 

STUPID CRIMINALS - 1 of 2

 

 

A Couple Got Sick of a Guy Stealing Their Packages . . . So They Bait Him Using a Fake Package Filled With Poop

 

 

HIGHLIGHTS:  A couple inWashingtonD.C. wanted to get revenge on the guy who's been stealing packages off their front porch, and help the cops catch him.  So they took an Amazon box . . . filled it up with DOG POOP . . . then put it on their porch as bait with a camera pointed at it.  He stole it on Monday, and now the cops have the footage.

 

 

FULL STORY:  It's the busiest time of the year for delivering packages . . . and that means a TON of unattended boxes left on people's porches and doorsteps.  Which is a pretty ripe opportunity for thieves.

 

 

A couple inWashingtonD.C.has been having trouble with one . . . someone kept stealing packages off their front porch.  So they decided to get him busted AND get revenge on him.

 

 

First they took an Amazon box and filled it up with DOG POOP.  Then they put it on their porch as bait . . . with a surveillance camera pointed right at it.

 

 

The thief took the bait on Monday . . . although he didn't open the package until he was off-camera, so they don't know how he reacted.

 

 

And the couple gave the surveillance footage of him to the local news and the cops, so they're trying to track him down.  (ABC 7 - Washington D.C.)

 

 

(Here are some shots of his face from the footage.  You can also see the footage of him stealing the package on YouTube . . . search for DC package thief.)

 

 

 

STUPID CRIMINALS - 2 of 2

 

 

A Guy Steals a Bunch of Heating Units, Then Gets Arrested When He Shows Up to a Press Conference About It

 

 

HIGHLIGHTS:  Last week, a guy stole 12 industrial-sized heating units from the top of a strip mall inDelaware.  Then while police were setting up a press conference about it, he pulled up in the same car they'd seen in security footage.  Now he's facing charges for felony theft and criminal mischief.

 

 

FULL STORY:  Early last week, a 43-year-old named John Royer somehow managed to steal 12 industrial-sized heating units from the top of a strip mall inNew Castle,Delaware, outsideWilmington.

 

 

It's not clear who helped him, but we know John was involved.  Because on Thursday, police were setting up for a press conference in the mall's parking lot . . .

 

 

And right before it started, John showed up . . . driving the same vehicle they'd seen in the security footage.

 

 

It's not clear if John was there to watch the press conference or what.  But he's being charged with felony theft and criminal mischief.

 

 

Police are still trying to identify the other people involved.

 

 

 

 

(Check out his mugshot here.)

 

 

BIRTHDAYS - 1 of 3

 

 

Erica Dahm is 37.  One-third of the "Dahm Triplets" who Jay "Son of Phil" McGraw gets to nail ANYTIME HE WANTS TO!

 

 

MAYIM BIALIK! is 39.  BLOSSOM on "Blossom" . . . AND . . . a featured performer on "Circus of the Stars #14"!  She was also a friendly lesbian on an episode of "Curb Your Enthusiasm".  Now she's on "The Big Bang Theory".

 

 

Hank Williams the Third is 42.  Country punk son of Hank Williams, Jr.  Hank-Three LOVES the reefer.

 

 

Jennifer Connelly! is 44.  Minx from "A Beautiful Mind", "Hulk" and "Blood Diamond", the young minx in David Bowie's 1986 movie "Labyrinth", and Russell Crowe's wife in "Noah".

 

 

(Jennifer Connelly LOVES getting all naked on-screen.  Check her out sans clothing in these fine films . . . "House of Sand and Fog", "Requiem for a Dream", "Waking the Dead", "Inventing the Abbotts", "Mulholland Falls", "Of Love and Shadows" and "The Hot Spot".)

 

 

(She doesn't even have to get naked, though.  She can even make riding a silly mechanical horse sexy.)

 

 

Mädchen Amick is 44.  Wendy Beauchamp on Lifetime's "Witches of East End".  Back in the day she played Shelly on "Twin Peaks" . . . and Christian Slater's gorgeous wife on the short-lived series "My Own Worst Enemy".

 

 

 

BIRTHDAYS - 2 of 3

 

 

Mattress actress Christi Lake is 50.  She's starred in 231 fine films . . . including "Dial P for Pink", "Philmore Butts Taking Care of Business", "My Horny Valentine", "Sleeping Booty", AND "POCAHOTASS"!

 

 

Spin Doctors guitarist Eric Schenkman is 51.  Their biggest album is 1991's "Pocket Full of Kryptonite" . . . with "Little Miss Can't Be Wrong" and "Two Princes".

 

 

"I Used To Be" Susan Powter is 57.  Annoying motivator [slash] fitness expert.  "Stop the Insanity"!

 

(She's gay now.  For a while there, she grew her hair back . . . but now it's short again.  Either way, she's quite the tattooed M.I.L.F.  And she's still encouraging people to STOP THE INSANITY.  Thank God for Twitter.)

 

 

SHEILA E. is 57.  Biggest Hit:  "The Glamorous Life".

 

 

Bill Nighy is 65.  Davy Jones in the "Pirates of the Caribbean" movies, Viktor in the "Underworld" films, and Shaun's stepfather in "Shaun of the Dead".  He was also HILARIOUS as over-the-hill rock star Billy Mack in "Love Actually".

 

 

Dickey Betts is 71.  Former Allman Brothers guitarist who wrote their hits "Jessica" and "Rambling Man" . . . both of which have made their way to the plastic guitar world.  He was booted from the band in 2000 due to his supposed substance abuse problems.

 

 

 

BIRTHDAYS - 3 of 3

 

 

Dionne Warwick is 74.  Singer, psychic friend, tax cheat, large nostrils, Whitney Houston's cousin, loves the reefer.

 

 

Connie Francis is 76.  Biggest Hits: "Where the Boys Are" . . . and ROCK BOTTOM!  Real Ethnic Name:  Concetta Rosa Maria Franconero.

 

 

Bob Barker is 91.  Retired "Price Is Right" stud who STILL gets more trim than you.

 

 

Ed Koch  (1924 - 2013)  Former New York City mayor and "People's Court" judge.

 

 

Frank Sinatra  (1915 - 1998)

 

 

 

 

Countdown to Upcoming Events

• 5 days to the third "Hobbit" movie

• 13 shopping days to Christmas

• 20 days to the New Year

• 63 days to "Fifty Shades of Grey"

• 64 days to Valentine's Day

• 770 days left of "Hope and Change"

 

 


DECEMBER 12th - BACK IN THE DAY - 1 of 2

 

 

192 years ago . . . In 1822, MEXICO WAS OFFICIALLY RECOGNIZED AS AN INDEPENDENT NATION BY THE U.S.  Now it's recognized as our farm team.

 

 

115 years ago . . . In 1899, Dr. George Grant, a black dentist from Boston, Massachusetts, PATENTED THE GOLF TEE!  Before that, golfers teed off from a mound of sand.

 

 

57 years ago . . . In 1957, JERRY LEE LEWIS MARRIED HIS 13-YEAR-OLD COUSIN, Myra Gale Brown, while he was still married to his first wife.

 

(In theDeep South, marriage to a 13-year-old cousin wasn't considered especially outrageous or extraordinary . . . but BIGAMY was, and it hit the fan!  Jerry Lee Lewis was denounced by moralists across theU.S.and the scandal nearly ended his career.)

 

 

57 years ago . . . In 1957, a Portland, Oregon, DJ (Al Priddy of KEX) was fired for playing ELVIS PRESLEY'S awesome version of "White Christmas" . . . because the station manager thought it was sacrilegious.

 

 

51 years ago . . . In 1963, "John Fitzgerald Kennedy:  A Memorial Album" became the FASTEST-SELLING RECORD of all time, by selling four million copies in six days.  (I guess you could say it went to #1 . . . WITH A BULLET.)  (Too soon?)

 

 

47 years ago . . . In 1967, "Guess Who's Coming To Dinner" was released, starring SPENCER TRACY and KATHARINE HEPBURN as a couple of parents whose beliefs are challenged when their daughter brings home her interracially taboo fiancé, the mantastic SIDNEY POITIER.

 

It was remade as "Guess Who" in 2005 . . . where the races were reversed . . . and BERNIE MAC'S black daughter brought home honky ASHTON KUTCHER.

 

 

40 years ago . . . In 1974, "The Godfather:  Part 2" was released.  It won the Oscar that year for Best Picture.  (That made it the first sequel to win Best Picture.  "The Lord of the Rings:  The Return of the King" is the only sequel to win it since.)

 

(Still, Francis Ford Coppola recently said there should have only been ONE "Godfather" movie.  Although he didn't say WHICH one.)  (???)

 

 

DECEMBER 12th - BACK IN THE DAY - 2 of 2

 

 

40 years ago . . . In 1974, Guitarist MICK TAYLOR left the ROLLING STONES after five years.  When he joined the band, he was a non-smoking, non-drinking vegetarian.  (When he left, he was a heroin addict.  RON WOOD was later recruited as his replacement.)

 

 

39 years ago . . . In 1975, SARA JANE MOORE stated that she had willfully tried to kill PRESIDENT GERALD FORD.  She was serving a life sentence at a caged heat prison inPleasanton,California, but she was released on parole in 2007.

 

 

34 years ago . . . In 1980, "Stir Crazy" was released . . . starring geniuses GENE WILDER and RICHARD PRYOR in a prison comedy, as a couple of chumps framed for a bank robbery.

 

 

28 years ago . . . In 1986, "The Golden Child" was released . . . starring EDDIE MURPHY(All you have to say when someone brings up this movie is "I, I, I want the knife."  It's the best part of the movie and the only thing anyone remembers about it.  Here's video.)

 

 

27 years ago . . . In 1987, "Fraggle Rock" debuted on NBC!

 

 

23 years ago . . . In 1991, RICHARD GERE married CINDY CRAWFORD.  They divorced in 1995.

 

 

Nine years ago . . . In 2005, YOUNG BUCK pleaded no contest to an assault with a deadly weapon charge for stabbing a guy who'd punched Dr. Dre at the Vibe Awards.  (As part of his plea bargain, he got three years of felony probation and 80 hours of community service but NO prison time.)

 

 

Eight years ago . . . In 2006, PETER BOYLE . . . who played Frank Barrone on "Everybody Loves Raymond" and the monster in the Mel Brooks comedy "Young Frankenstein" . . . died at the age of 71.

 

 

 

 

 

SATURDAY BIRTHDAYS - 1 of 3

 

 

Taylor Swift is 25.  She's what Miley Cyrus SHOULD HAVE become. Taylor's already sold over 27 million albums and successfully crossed over from country to pop without the benefit of a single twerk or nude photo scandal.

 

 

Katherine Schwarzenegger is 25.

 

 

Amy Lee is 33.  Oddly sexy Evanescence minx.  Their 2003 album "Fallen" won them the Best New Artist Grammy for that year . . . and features their jams "Going Under", "My Immortal" and "Bring Me To Life".

 

(The rest of Amy's original Evanescence bandmates have hooked up with former "American Idol" minx CARLY SMITHSON to form WE ARE THE FALLEN . . . which is basically Evanescence, but without Amy's drama.  Check 'em out at facebook.com/wearethefallen.)

 

 

Tom DeLonge is 39.  Blink-182 guitarist and singer.

 

 

Mattress actress Jen X. is 42.  She's starred in 34 FINE films . . . including "Bone", "Bone:  The Second Coming", "Latex Abduction" AND "Smells Like Fish"!

 

 

Jamie Foxx is 47.  He is Django . . . and he IS unchained.  Also Electro in "The Amazing Spider-Man 2" and Dean "Mother[effer]" Jones in "Horrible Bosses" and its sequel.

 

 

NeNe Leakes is 47.  One of the few people ever to make the transition from reality show star to actual star.  She was on "The Real Housewives of Atlanta" . . . but has been cast in real, recurring roles on "Glee" and "The New Normal".

 

 

 

SATURDAY BIRTHDAYS - 2 of 3

 

 

Rex and Rob Ryan are 52. Large and loud twin sons of NFL coaching legend Buddy Ryan.  Rex is the head coach of the New York Jets and Rob is the defensive coordinator for the New Orleans Saints.

 

 

Johnny Whitaker is 55.  Jody on "Family Affair" AND Johnny Stuart on "Sigmund & The Sea Monsters".

 

 

Morris Day is 57.  Lead singer of The Time.  Biggest album:  1984's "Ice Cream Castle", featuring the hit smashes "The Bird" and "JUNGLE LOVE".

 

 

Steve Buscemi is 57.  One of the greatest character actors ever.  For some reason, he slums in all of Adam Sandler's movies.  Now he's on HBO's "Boardwalk Empire".

 

Related Comedy:  Steve Buscemi turns 57 today.  He plans on putting a bunch of birthday cake on his plate, but not finishing it, because his eyes are literally bigger than his stomach.

 

 

Wendie Malick is 64.  Nina on "Just Shoot Me" AND Gayle Buchannon on "Baywatch".  But these days she has the honor of starring alongside Betty White in TV Land's "Hot in Cleveland".

 

 

Randy Owen is 65.  Singer forAlabama.  He also plays rhythm guitar.

 

 

Jeff "Skunk" Baxter is 66.  Doobie Brothers guitarist and one of our LEADING EXPERTS ON MILITARY DEFENSE!  True!

 

Skunk Baxter learned everything he knows about terrorism, missile defense, and chemical and biological warfare just from reading war history books, technical weapons texts and defense manuals!

 

 

 

SATURDAY BIRTHDAYS - 3 of 3

 

 

Ted Nugent is 66.  Should have been dead or in jail by now.  Since he's not, one could potentially infer that he's just a cowardly liar who shoots off his mouth without having any intention of backing up his ridiculous hyperbole.  But I'm sure that's not the case.

 

 

Christopher Plummer is 85.  Captain von Trapp in "The Sound of Music" . . . and General Chang in "Star Trek 6:  The Undiscovered Country"!

 

He also plays Dr. Parnassus in Heath Ledger's final film "The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus" . . . and he's in the forgotten '80s classic, "Dreamscape", starring Dennis Quaid and a VICIOUS SNAKE-MAN!

 

 

Dick Van Dyke is 89.  He may be an American treasure, but his attempt at a British accent when he played the chimney sweep in "Mary Poppins" is reviled by the English to this day . . . more than 40 years later.

 

(It's also universally regarded as one of the WORST movie accents of all time, as you can hear in this "Chim Chim Cher-ee" clip.)

 

 

Alvin C. York  (1887 - 1964)  Hillbilly sharpshooter and TRUE war hero.  He captured 132 soldiers BY HIMSELF during the First World War.

 

After he shot 17 men with his rifle and eight more with his pistol, the remaining Germans were just too demoralized to fight, and surrendered to this ONE MAN!  Gary Cooper played him in the movie "Sergeant York".

 

 

 

 


SUNDAY BIRTHDAYS - 1 of 2

 

 

Vanessa Hudgens is 26.  Baby V!  The star of Disney Channel's "High School Musical", and some very naughty nude digital pictures neither she nor Mickey Mouse wanted you to see.

 

 

KaDee Strickland is 39.  Dr. Charlotte King on "Private Practice".

 

 

Natascha McElhone is 45.  Was David Duchovny's girlfriend Karen on "Californication".

 

 

Ted Raimi is 49.  Joxer on "Hercules" and "Xena"!  You might also remember him from for his supporting roles all three original "Spider-Man" films, each of the "Evil Dead" movies, "Darkman", "Drag Me to Hell" and "Oz the Great and Powerful" . . . which were all directed by his older brother Sam Raimi.

 

 

Cynthia Gibb is 51.  Holly on "Fame" and the anorexic Karen Carpenter in "The Karen Carpenter Story".

 

 

Ginger Lynn is 52.  LEGENDARY mattress actress.  Remember the classic 1985 blockbuster "BETWEEN THE CHEEKS"?

 

Our Ginger Lynn has starred in 280 fine films, including "Whore of the Worlds" AND "Poonies"!  She also used to date the insatiable Charlie Sheen.

 

(But that was in another life, right?  Nowadays, Charlie is a fine, upstanding gentleman and a model parent, is he not?  Hello?)

 

 

Cliff Williams is 65.  AC/DC BASSIST!  Their biggest albums include 1979's "Highway to Hell" featuring the hit title track;  1980's "Back in Black" with their smashes "You Shook Me All Night Long", "Shoot to Thrill", "Hells Bells" and "Back in Black";  and . . . 1990's "The Razor's Edge" with "Moneytalks", "Thunderstruck" and "Are You Ready".

 

("Back in Black" is the second best selling album of ALL TIME . . . right behind Michael Jackson's "Thriller".  It's moved around 49 million copies worldwide.)

 

 

 

SUNDAY BIRTHDAYS - 2 of 2

 

 

Bill Buckner is 65.  Played 22 seasons in the Major Leagues . . . but will always be remembered for letting Mookie Wilson's ground ball roll through his legs, costing the Red Sox the 1986 World Series.

 

 

Dee Wallace is 66.  Eliott's mom in "ET" . . . and THE star of "The Howling".  She was also in Rob Zombie's latest disappointment, "Lords of Salem".

 

 

Patty Duke is 68.  Twins Patty & Cathy Lane on "The Patty Duke Show" . . . and quite the saucy panelist on "Match Game '76"!

 

 

She's the mother of "Lord of the Rings" stud Sean Astin.  JOHN ASTIN . . . a.k.a. Gomez Addams on "The Addams Family", is Sean's STEPFATHER.  John and Patty got together when Sean was just three years old.

 

 

Joyce Vincent-Wilson is 68.  Tony Orlando & Dawn!

 

 

Hal Williams is 76.  Officer Smitty on "Sanford & Son" AND Marla Gibbs' husband, Lester, on "227".

 

 

Nostradamus  (1503 - 1566)  French physician, astrologer, prophet.  Real filthy Frenchy name:  Michel de Notredame.

 

 

 

 

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