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Whatever 1.17

Your daily dose of whatever includes:

  • Full list of Oscar Nominations
  • Shia Lebouf just keeps getting into trouble
  • Your favorite sport in America is……?

“American Hustle” and “Gravity” Got the Most Oscar Nominations 

Nominations for this year’s Oscars were announced yesterday . . . and “American Hustle” and “Gravity” tied for the most, with 10 apiece.  “12 Years a Slave” was a close second with nine.  The Oscars air Sunday, March 2nd on ABC.  ELLEN DEGENERES is hosting.

The Oscar “Snubs” Include:  Oprah, Robert Redford and Tom Hanks 

The biggest Oscar “snubs” were Oprah Winfrey and her movie, “The Butler” . . . Tom Hanks not being nominated for EITHER of his movies . . . Robert Redford being passed over . . . and the Coen Brothers movie, “Inside Llewyn Davis” not being nominated in the major or music-related categories.

Unlike Oprah and Tom Hanks, “Bad Grandpa” Got an Oscar Nomination . . . and So Did “The Lone Ranger” 

Some people thought TOM HANKS’ Walt Disney movie, “Saving Mr. Banks”, would be a PLAYER at the Oscars, but when the nominations were announced, it received the same number as “Jackass Presents:  Bad Grandpa”.

And amazingly, that number is NOT ZERO.  (???)

It’s ONE.  “Bad Grandpa” was nominated for Best Makeup and Hairstyling, along with the ESTEEMED JOHNNY DEPP movie, “The Lone Ranger”.

“Saving Mr. Banks” was only nominated for Best Score.

This Year’s Oscar Nominees 

 

 

Best Picture:

“American Hustle”

“Captain Phillips”

“Dallas Buyers Club”

“Gravity”

“Her”

“Nebraska”

“Philomena”

“12 Years a Slave”

“The Wolf of Wall Street”

Best Actor:

 

Christian Bale,  “American Hustle”

Bruce Dern,  “Nebraska”

Leonardo DiCaprio,  “The Wolf of Wall Street”

Chiwetel Ejiofor,  “12 Years a Slave”

Matthew McConaughey,  “Dallas Buyers Club”

 

 

Best Actress:

 

Amy Adams,  “American Hustle”

Cate Blanchett,  “Blue Jasmine”

Sandra Bullock,  “Gravity”

Judi Dench,  “Philomena”

Meryl Streep,  “August: Osage County”

Best Supporting Actor:

 

Barkhad Abdi,  “Captain Phillips”

Bradley Cooper,  “American Hustle”

Michael Fassbender,  “12 Years a Slave”

Jonah Hill,  “The Wolf of Wall Street”

Jared Leto,  “Dallas Buyers Club”

 

 

Best Supporting Actress:

 

Sally Hawkins,  “Blue Jasmine”

Jennifer Lawrence,  “American Hustle”

Lupita Nyong’o,  “12 Years a Slave”

Julia Roberts,  “August: Osage County”

June Squibb,  “Nebraska”

 

 

Best Director:

David O. Russell,  “American Hustle”

Alfonso Cuarón,  “Gravity”

Alexander Payne,  “Nebraska”

Steve McQueen,  “12 Years a Slave”

Martin Scorsese,  “The Wolf of Wall Street”

 

 

Best Animated Feature Film:

“The Croods”

“Despicable Me 2″

“Ernest & Celestine”

“Frozen”

“The Wind Rises”

Best Documentary Feature:

 

“The Act of Killing”

“Cutie and the Boxer”

“Dirty Wars”

“The Square”

“20 Feet from Stardom”

 

 

Best Documentary (Short Subject):

 

“CaveDigger”

“Facing Fear”

“Karama Has No Walls”

“The Lady in Number 6: Music Saved My Life”

“Prison Terminal: The Last Days of Private Jack Hall”

 

 

Best Adapted Screenplay:

 

“Before Midnight”

“Captain Phillips”

“Philomena”

“12 Years a Slave”

“The Wolf of Wall Street”

 

 

Best Original Screenplay:

 

“American Hustle”

“Blue Jasmine”

“Dallas Buyers Club”

“Her”

“Nebraska”

Best Foreign Film:

 

“The Broken Circle Breakdown”  (Belgium)

“The Great Beauty”  (Italy)

“The Hunt”  (Denmark)

“The Missing Picture”  (Cambodia)

“Omar”  (Palestine)

 

 

Best Film Editing:

 

“American Hustle”

“Captain Phillips”

“Dallas Buyers Club”

“Gravity”

“12 Years a Slave”

 

 

Best Costume Design:

 

“American Hustle”

“The Grandmaster”

“The Great Gatsby”

“The Invisible Woman”

“12 Years a Slave”

 

 

Best Makeup and Hairstyling:

 

“Dallas Buyers Club”

“Jackass Presents:  Bad Grandpa”

“The Lone Ranger”

 

 

Best Visual Effects:

 

“Gravity”

“The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug”

“Iron Man 3″

“The Lone Ranger”

“Star Trek Into Darkness”

Best Sound Mixing:

 

“Captain Phillips”

“Gravity”

“The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug”

“Inside Llewyn Davis”

“Lone Survivor”

 

 

Best Sound Editing:

 

“All Is Lost”

“Captain Phillips”

“Gravity”

“The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug”

“Lone Survivor”

 

 

Best Production Design:

 

“American Hustle”

“Gravity”

“The Great Gatsby”

“Her”

“12 Years a Slave”

 

 

Best Cinematography:

 

“The Grandmaster”

“Gravity”

“Inside Llewyn Davis”

“Nebraska”

“Prisoners”

Best Original Score:

 

“The Book Thief”

“Gravity”

“Her”

“Philomena”

“Saving Mr. Banks”

 

 

Best Original Song:

 

“Alone Yet Not Alone” . . . from “Alone Yet Not Alone”

“Happy” by Pharrell Williams . . . from “Despicable Me 2″

“Let It Go” . . . from “Frozen”

“The Moon Song” by Karen O of the Yeah Yeah Yeahs . . . from “Her”

“Ordinary Love” by U2 . . . from “Mandela:  Long Walk to Freedom”

 

 

Best Short Film (Animated):

 

“Feral”

“Get a Horse!”

“Mr. Hublot”

“Possessions”

“Room on the Broom”

 

 

Best Short Film (Live Action):

 

“That Wasn’t Me”

“Just Before Losing Everything”

“Helium”

“Do I Have to Take Care of Everything?”

“The Voorman Problem”

Sexy Pictures of Famous People 

 

 

1.  (NC-17)  RIHANNA showed off one of her nipple piercings.  Possibly by accident, but you never know.  (WARNING!!!  Nudity ahead.)

 

 

(Meanwhile, here are some KILLER bathing suit pics.)

 

 

 

2.  Check out a solo shot of SHAKIRA in the swimsuit she wore in the “cover art” for her new song with RIHANNA.

 

 

 

3.  PETER DINKLAGE on a Razor scooter is everything you’d want it to be.

 

 

 

4.  I’m no psychic, but something tells me sexy swimsuit photos of IRELAND BALDWIN are going to take a long time to get old.

 

 

 

5.  And here’s ANNE HATHAWAY on the beach in a bikini top, both nipples blazing.

The Professor from “Gilligan’s Island” Has Died 

RUSSELL JOHNSON . . . better known as the Professor on “Gilligan’s Island” . . . died yesterday of natural causes.  He was 89.  That leaves only TWO of the original “seven stranded castaways”:  DAWN WELLS, who played Mary Ann, is 75 . . . and TINA LOUISE, who played Ginger, is 79.

Reuben Kincaid from “The Partridge Family” Has Died 

 

 

Actor DAVE MADDEN died yesterday of congestive heart and kidney failure.  He was 82.

 

 

Madden was best known for playing band manager Reuben Kincaid on “The Partridge Family” in the 1970s.  He was usually being tortured in some way by Danny Partridge . . . a.k.a. DANNY BONADUCE.

 

 

In the late ’70s and early ’80s, he also played Earl on the sitcom “Alice”.

There Is Only One “Wizard of Oz” Munchkin Left Alive 

 

 

Forget about snow leopards and bald eagles . . . no creature on this Earth is more endangered at this moment than the “Wizard of Oz” Munchkin.  Because there’s only ONE of the original 124 left on Earth.

 

 

Four-foot tall minx RUTH DUCCINI died of natural causes yesterday, at the age of 95.  Before her death, there was still a CHANCE the species could live on, because the one remaining Munchkin is a guy.  His name is JERRY MAREN and he’s 93. 

 

 

Sure, successful fertilization between these two had an outside chance at best, but science has been doing great things . . . and they should have at least TRIED.  Because now, when Jerry dies, the Lollipop Guild dies with him.  (Here’s a picture of Ruth back in the day.)

Shia LaBeouf Headbutted a Guy in a London Bar 

SHIA LABEOUF was caught on video headbutting a guy in a bar in South London last night.  Apparently, Shia thought the guy said something about his girlfriend’s mother because he got in his face, gave him a head-to-head shove, then yelled, “What did you just say?” four times, before being pulled away.

“Jack Ryan: Shadow Recruit” is One of Four Movies in Theaters This Week

 

 

1.  Jack Ryan: Shadow Recruit  (PG-13)  Trailer

 

This is the fifth movie to feature the character Jack Ryan from the Tom Clancy books.  Chris Pine from the new “Star Trek” movies is the fourth actor to play him.

2.  Ride Along  (PG-13)  Trailer

 

Ice Cube and Kevin Hart star as soon-to-be brother-in-laws.  Ice Cube plays a cop who doesn’t think a manic, video game champion is good enough to marry his sister, who’s played by Tika Sumpter. 

 

 

So he makes Kevin do a 24 hour “ride along” in his patrol car to prove that he’s worthy, after getting John Leguizamo to help make certain that he’ll fail.  Laurence Fishburne is also in it as the bad guy.

 

 

 

3.  Devil’s Due  (R)  Trailer

 

“Devil’s Due” is the latest issue in the “demon baby” horror genre.  (Sort of like “Rosemary’s Baby” and other movies, it taps into people’s fears around childbirth and becoming a parent.)

 

 

Zach Gilford plays the father whose wife gives birth to a demon . . . you may remember him as Matt Saracen on “Friday Night Lights”,.

 

 

Here’s another look at the promo video they did, where random people stop to help a crying baby, and an animatronic “devil baby” jumps out at them.

 

 

 

4.  The Nut Job  (PG)  Trailer

 

Will Arnett plays a squirrel who’s been banished from the park after destroying everyone’s winter food supply.  So he cooks up a scheme to rob a nut store in the city.

 

 

Brendan Fraser and Katherine Heigl are two of the other squirrels, Liam Neeson is the raccoon leader of the park, and Maya Rudolph is the dog guarding the store.

Watch Kate Gosselin’s Kids Humiliate Her on Live TV 

KATE GOSSELIN brought her 13-year-old twin daughters Cara and Mady on the “Today” show yesterday to do damage control . . . and things didn’t go exactly as she’d planned.  The girls wouldn’t talk, and Kate was visibly frustrated and embarrassed.

Friday TV Reminders:

 

“Real Time with Bill Maher” [12th Season Premiere]. . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on HBO.

 

“Patton Oswalt: Tragedy Plus Comedy Equals Time” . . . 10:00 to 11:00 p.m. on Epix.  As I’m sure you all know, the REAL formula is Comedy = Tragedy + Time.  Unless you’re Patton Oswalt, then you can apparently make comedy out of anything.

 

“The Diamond Collar” [Series Premiere] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on OWN.  A reality show about a former mafia enforcer who now runs a dog grooming parlor in Brooklyn.

Saturday TV Reminders:

 

“Flowers in the Attic” . . . 8:00 to 10:00 p.m. on Lifetime.  Heather Graham stars in this new movie version of that creepy incestuous novel.  Her character marries her uncle, but eventually has to move back home after her husband dies.

 

And since her dad would freak if he knew they’d had children, she locks her four kids up in the attic . . . where the two oldest begin an incestuous relationship of their own.

 

“Mom’s Got Game” [Series Premiere] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 p.m. on OWN.  A reality show about Denver Nuggets center JaVale McGee and his mom, a former WNBA star.

 

“HitRecord on TV” [Series Premiere] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 p.m. on Pivot.  Joseph Gordon Levitt hosts a half hour variety show featuring live performances, short films, and music.  It kicks off with back-to-back episodes, and the first episode is online now.

 

“Saturday Night Live” . . . 11:30 p.m. to 1:00 a.m. on NBC.  Drake pulls double duty as both the host and the music guest.

Sunday TV Reminders:

 

 

“AFC Championship” . . . 3:00 to 6:30 P.M. Eastern . . . (Noon to 3:30 p.m. Pacific) on CBS.  The Denver Broncos host the New England Patriots.

 

 

“NFC Championship” . . . 6:30 to 10:30 P.M. Eastern . . . (3:30 to 7:30 p.m. Pacific) on Fox.  The Seattle Seahawks host the San Francisco 49ers.

 

 

“The Following” [2nd Season Premiere] . . . 7:30 to 9:00 P.M. on Fox.

 

 

“Betrayal” [1st Season Finale] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on ABC.

 

 

“#RichKids of Beverly Hills” [Series Premiere] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on E!  This reality show is like a younger version of “Real Housewives”, about five trust-fund kids.  And even though it’s an E! show, you can watch the first episode on Hulu. 

 

(For you Instagram stalkers, here are the girls’ accounts:  dorothywang, boobsandloubs_, roxysowlaty . . . and the guys:  brendanfitzp and jonnydrubel.)

 

 

“Looking” [Series Premiere] . . . 10:30 to 11:00 P.M. on HBO.  This is like a gay version of “Sex and the City”, about three deliciously gay men living together in San Francisco.  Not so surprisingly, it stars Jonathan Groff . . . one of the guys from “Glee”.

Tonight’s Late Night Talk Shows:

 

 

“Letterman” – Comedian Myq Kaplan.  Music Guest:  Roadkill Ghost Choir.

 

 

“Jimmy Kimmel”Sofia Vergara and Emmy Rossum.  Music Guest: Yuna.

 

 

“The Tonight Show”Chelsea Handler and Bob Costas.  Music Guest:  Sharon Jones & the Dap-Kings.

 

 

“Jimmy Fallon”Kevin Hart (“Ride Along”) and Val Kilmer (“Spoils of Babylon”).  Music Guest:  Jhene Aiko.

 

 

“Carson Daly”Chelsea Peretti (“Brooklyn Nine-Nine”) and “Family Guy” writer Julius Sharpe.  Music Guests:  Sarah Lee Guthrie & Johnny Irion.  (REPEAT)

 

 

“Arsenio”Nicole Beharie (“Sleepy Hollow”) and “12 Years a Slave” director Steve McQueen.  Music Guest:  Faith Evans.

 

 

“Craig Ferguson”Chris Pine (“Jack Ryan: Shadow Recruit”) and Morena Baccarin (“Back in the Day”).

 

 

“Chelsea Lately”Zosia Mamet (“Girls”).  (REPEAT)

Five Random Facts For Friday

Here are a few random facts for you.  There’s a measurement called a BUTT . . . it’s about 477 liters.  The “Chuck” in CHUCK NORRIS stands for Carlos.  And the first pass BRETT FAVRE ever completed in the NFL was to . . . himself, after a defensive lineman tipped the pass right back to him.

1.  TIM DUNCAN is one of the best NBA players ever . . . but growing up in the Virgin Islands, he originally wanted to be a swimmer.  He only took up basketball in 9th grade when Hurricane Hugo destroyed the island’s only Olympic-sized swimming pool.

 

 

2.  There’s a measurement called a BUTT.  It’s equivalent to about 477 liters.  It comes from the medieval French term “botte” and was used to measure wine.

 

 

3.  The “Chuck” in CHUCK NORRIS isn’t short for Charles . . . it’s short for Carlos.

 

 

4.  The reason karate belts go white, yellow, orange, green, blue, purple, brown, red, black is that fighters used to only be able to afford one belt . . . so they had to keep dying it darker and darker colors as they progressed.

 

 

5.  This is a good one to drop during football on Sunday.  The first pass BRETT FAVRE ever completed in the NFL was to . . . himself.  The pass was tipped by a defensive lineman and Brett caught it.  He lost seven yards in the process.

 

 

(Wikipedia / Wikipedia / Biography / World Martial Arts Center / YouTube)

For the 28th Year in a Row, Pro Football Is the Most Popular Sport in America

 

Harris just released the results of their annual poll on the most popular sport in America . . . and for the 28th year in a row, pro football won.  Back in 1985, it had a 1% margin of victory over pro baseball . . . now that margin is up to 21%.  The rest of the top five are college football, auto racing, and men’s pro basketball.

%.  (Harris Interactive)

Half of People Believe God Plays a Role in the Super Bowl

According to a new survey, HALF of Americans say they believe God or some supernatural force plays a role in determining the outcome of sporting events.  Overall, 26% of fans have prayed to God to help their team and 25% believe their team is cursed.

26% of fans have prayed to God to help their team.

 

 

25% of fans believe their team is CURSED.

 

 

And 21% perform some kind of pregame or game-time superstition or ritual. 

 

 

(Public Religion Research Institute)

The Ten Most Ridiculous Ways People Have Blown Their Chances in a Job Interview . . . and the Ten Most Common Ways People Do It

According to a recent survey, the most ridiculous ways people have ruined their chances in a job interview include asking for a HUG, showing up in a sweat suit so they could go JOGGING afterward, and explaining that they might come off a bit strange . . . because they took too much VALIUM earlier in the day.

 

1.  A woman explained that she probably didn’t give a good interview . . . because she’d taken too much VALIUM earlier in the day.

 

2.  The applicant interrupted the interview to answer a phone call about ANOTHER interview with a different company.

 

3.  A guy showed up in a sweat suit so he could go JOGGING afterward.

 

4.  An applicant asked for a HUG during the interview.

 

5.  An applicant brought personal photo albums to show off during the interview.

 

6.  A job candidate referred to HIMSELF as his own personal hero.

 

7.  A guy asked for the name and phone number for the female receptionist.

 

8.  A woman showed up to her interview by crashing her car into the building.

 

9.  While discussing dental benefits, the applicant took his FAKE TEETH out.

 

10.  A guy casually mentioned that he might not be his daughter’s REAL father.

Now here are the ten MOST COMMON ways people ruin their chances in job interviews.

 

 

1.  Coming across as disinterested.

 

2.  Dressing inappropriately.

 

3.  Coming across as arrogant.

 

4.  Bashing your current or previous employer.

 

5.  Answering a cell phone or texting during the interview.

 

6.  Appearing uninformed about the company.

 

7.  Not providing specific examples of how you’ll be a good fit.

 

8.  Asking dumb questions.

 

9.  Providing too much personal information.

 

10.  Asking the INTERVIEWER personal questions.

(PR Newswire)

 

Half of Us Take a Lunch Break That’s 30 Minutes or Less . . . and Most of It Gets Wasted Talking With Coworkers

According to a new survey, about HALF of us get less than HALF AN HOUR off for lunch.  9% get no break, 7% get 10 to 20 minutes, and 32% get a half hour.  Only 38% of people get at least an hour.

(PR Newswire)

What’s a Safety Rule You Never Follow?

What’s a safety rule you NEVER follow?  Some of the most common safety rules no one listens to are:  Check your tire pressure before you drive . . . have a glass of water for every alcoholic drink . . . read the Terms and Conditions before clicking “I Accept” on an iTunes update . . . and don’t eat food that fell on the ground, even if it was down for less than five seconds.

1.  Check your tire pressure in all four tires before you drive.

 

2.  Don’t eat raw cookie dough.

 

3.  Don’t use Q-tips to clean your ears.

 

4.  Always have up-to-date antivirus software running on your computer.

 

5.  Have one glass of water for every alcoholic drink you have.

 

6.  Read the Terms and Conditions before you click “I Accept” on an iTunes update or any other computer update.

 

7.  Let stuff sit in the microwave for a minute before you take it out and start eating it.

 

8.  Scrub your hands for at least 20 seconds every time you wash them.

 

9.  Don’t eat food that fell on the ground . . . even if it was down for less than five seconds.  (Reddit)

One in Six Parents Do All of Their Children’s Homework

According to a new survey, one out of six parents admit they do ALL of their children’s homework.  Of that group, 10% say they do it because they don’t want their kids to be upset at night and throw tantrums . . . and 38% say their kids even wander off and do other stuff while their parents knock out their work.

(Daily Mail)

A Family Has Four Kids With the Same Birthday . . . Beating One-in-133,000 Odds

This past Sunday, on January 12th, a couple in England had their fourth child.  And they should’ve KNOWN he’d be born that day . . . because their three other kids were all ALSO born on January 12th.  The odds of having four kids all born on the same day are one in 133,225.

(Daily Mail) 

Connor Cruise – 19  (The adopted son of Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman.  He was in the “Red Dawn” reboot and “Seven Pounds”.)

 

 

Calvin Harris – 30  (Scottish DJ who did that Let’s Go song with Ne-Yo.)

 

 

Dwyane Wade – 32  (Not-so-young NBA superstar on the Miami Heat.)

 

 

Ray J – 33  (Brandy’s younger brother.  When it comes to KIM KARDASHIAN, HE HIT IT FIRST!  His homemade sex tape with Kim is what launched her to fame . . . and unleashed that entire family on us today.  He also MAY have been WHITNEY HOUSTON’S boyfriend at the time of her death.)

 

 

Maksim Chmerkovskiy – 34  (“Dancing with the Stars” stud.  He came the closest to winning when he was partnered with Mel B and Kirstie Alley.  Both times, he came in second.  His other partners have included Brandy, Erin Andrews, Denise Richards, Tia Carrere and Olympic soccer minx Hope Solo.)

Zooey Deschanel – 34  (The “New Girl”!  She sings with M. Ward as the duo She & Him.  As an actress she was also the sister in “Almost Famous” . . . the cute department store employee in “Elf” . . . Trillian in “The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy” . . . and was incredible as the goth chick in “The Good Girl” with Jennifer Aniston.)

Freddy Rodriguez – 39  (He WAS Frederico . . . the en fuego embalmer turned partner on “Six Feet Under” . . . and a zombie tail-kicker in “Planet Terror”, one of the “Grindhouse” movies.)

 

 

Kid Rock – 43  (Failed to satisfy Pamela Anderson.  Not that you can blame him.  After Tommy Lee got finished with her, Pam’s vageen must hang loose like SLEEVE OF WIZARD.)

 

 

Naveen Andrews – 45  (Jafar on ABC’s “Once Upon a Time in Wonderland”., but you know him best as Sayid on “Lost”.  He also nails the much older Barbara Hershey . . . who played Natalie Portman’s mom in “Black Swan”.  Oh, and he co-starred with Freddy Rodriguez in “Planet Terror” as a man who collects HUMAN TESTES.)

Nici Sterling – 46  (Mattress actress who’s starred in 290 fine films, including . . . “Six Degrees of Penetration”, “Unaboner” and “KSEX 106.9″!)

 

 

Shabba Ranks – 48  (Urban street-wise troubadour.  Real name:  Rexton Rawlston Fernando Gordon.  He’s HUGE in Japan.  True!)

 

 

Michelle Obama – 50

 

 

Jim Carrey – 52  (Wisecracking Canadian honky who hates guns but loves Emma Stone.)

 

 

Denis O’Hare – 52  (Spalding / Larry Harvey on “American Horror Story”.  He was also Russel Edgington on “True Blood”.)

Susanna Hoffs – 55  (Sexy singer for the Bangles.)

Steve Harvey – 57  (Original King of Comedy, television superstar and more importantly, the man who made it okay to wear a suit with eight buttons!)

 

 

Steve Earle – 59  (Alt-country stud who’s been married seven times.  Currently betrothed to country minx Allison Moorer.  Steve is the father of singer (slash) rehab veteran Justin Townes Earle.)

 

 

Pete LaCock – 62  (Not-so-famous baseball player.  It’s just fun to say LaCock!)

 

 

Larry Foreskinsky (Fortensky, actually) – 62  (Construction worker who used to nail delicious old chubby Liz Taylor.)

 

 

Mick Taylor – 66  (Rolling Stones guitarist from 1969 to 1974.  When he joined the band, he was a non-smoking, non-drinking vegetarian.  When he left, he was addicted to heroin.)

 

 

MUHAMMAD ALI – 72  (THE GREATEST.)

 

 

Maury Povich – 75  (The lucky man who gets to nail Connie Chung AND say “You are NOT the father” to guys named Anfernee.  How did this man get the life I always dreamed of?)

JAMES EARL JONES – 83  (Stutterer.  Seriously.)

 

 

Betty White – 92  (True comedy legend.  I’d still nail her!)

VIDAL SASSOON! – Would have been 86 – (1928 – 2012)

Eartha Kitt – Would have been 87 – (1927 – 2008)  (Screw Halle Berry!  Eartha was the FIRST black Catwoman . . . on the original “Batman” with ADAM WEST!)

 

 

Shari Lewis – (1933 – 1998)  (Ventriloquist with Lamb Chop.)

 

 

Andy Kaufman – (1949 – 1984)  (Really is dead.)  (Although I’m holding out hope that he’ll show up somewhere this year, the 30th anniversary of his “death”, and blow us all away.  I know it’s not gonna happen, but it would be one of the most awesome things EVER.)

 

 

Al Capone – (1899 – 1947)  (He went crazy and died of the nasty NEURO-SYPHILIS!  HAVE SAFE GANGSTER SEX!)

 

 

Benjamin Franklin – (1706 – 1790)

Countdown to Upcoming Events

• 3 days to Martin Luther King Day

• 14 days to the Year of the Horse

• 16 days until Super Bowl 48

• 21 days to the Winter Olympics

• 28 days to Valentine’s Day

• 1,099 days left of “Hope and Change”

140 years ago . . . in 1874 – The FIRST “SIAMESE TWINS” died at the age of 63.  CHANG AND ENG of Siam (now Thailand) spent their life joined at the breastbone.  Both were married:  They spent three days of the week with one wife, and three days with the other.

143 years ago . . . in 1871 – Andrew S. Hallidie received a patent for his CABLE CAR system.  Three years later, his great invention changed the face of San Francisco.  And now . . . it just makes people hungry for Rice-a-Roni.

 

 

121 years ago . . . in 1893 - The White Man continued to keep those of a darker hue down . . . when a group of businessmen and sugar planters FORCED HAWAIIAN QUEEN LILIUOKALANI TO ABDICATE!

43 years ago . . . in 1971 - The BALTIMORE COLTS beat the DALLAS COWBOYS, 16-to-13, in SUPER BOWL FIVE.  Dallas linebacker CHUCK HOWLEY intercepted two passes and recovered a fumble.

39 years ago . . . in 1975 - “BARETTA” PREMIERED ON ABC!  (It lasted three seasons and went off the air in 1978.)  It starred a cockatoo named Fred, and America’s Favorite Murderer ROBERT BLAKE as New York undercover cop Tony Baretta.

 

31 years ago . . . in 1983 – Evangelist ORAL ROBERTS was exposed by the “Los Angeles Times” after the paper got their hands on a letter he’d sent his followers.  In the letter, Oral Roberts said that he had a seven-hour conversation with Jesus . . .

28 years ago . . . in 1986 - PRESIDENT REAGAN had three small polyps removed from his colon!

 

 

28 years ago . . . in 1986 – “The Clan of the Cave Bear” was released . . . starring DARYL HANNAH as a delicious Cro-Magnon babe being raised by primitive Neanderthals.

 

 

22 years ago . . . in 1992 – “Freejack” was released . . . starring MICK JAGGER and EMILIO ESTEVEZ.

 

 

20 years ago . . . in 1994 - DANNY BONADUCE beat DONNY OSMOND by a split decision in a charity boxing match.  Adding insult to injury, Bonaduce said, quote, “Donny Osmond was such a wimp, I actually got bored punching him.  His sister, Marie, would have been a tougher fight.”

 

 

16 years ago . . . in 1998 – DENNIS RODMAN was fined $25,000 and suspended indefinitely for kicking a cameraman in the junk.

 

 

Six years ago . . . in 2008 -Chess master BOBBY FISCHER died at age 64.

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