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West Michigan’s Funniest “Mom-isms”

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First off, thank you to everyone for sending in your “Mom-ism’s” this week!  Mother’s Day is coming up soon and to honor all of the West Michigan mothers, we gave away gift cards to Shari’s Berries in exchange for your “Mom-isms“.

A “Mom-ism” is a memorable sayings that your Mom told you that stuck.  As an example, Steve’s Mom used to always say “You can’t find your arse with both hands” when someone couldn’t find something.

So, let’s get to it!  Here are some of the funniest submissions we got!

  • “If you two were kidnapped, I’m confident that they would beg me to take you back.”
  • Me: “Mom, I’m thirsty.”  Mom: “Do you want me to spit in your mouth? “
  • “Please stop drinking out of dog water bowl!”
  • “It’s God’s day and I don’t want to ruin today’s sacredness, but you guys are acting like a bunch of a**holes”
  • “You spend the first two years teaching your child to walk and talk and the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut up.”
  • The thing I often tell my son:  “Stop playing with your winky in front of me. There will never be a time when that is okay.”  He’s five.
  • “Green beans make green poop.”
  • “Tough titty said the kitty when the milk went dry.”
  • “Use your thinker, not your stinker!”
  • “I’ve decided not to have kids. The kids are taking it pretty hard”
  • “Take a shower, you don’t want to known as the Stinky Kid.”
  • “Do you need me to call the waaaaambulance?”
  • “Your father isn’t dying, he just has a cold.”
  • “Raise your hands and touch your toes, if anything shows go change your clothes.”
  • “Ruth-Lisa-Ang, wait which one are you?”

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