New Year’s Eve – Don’t Be That Girl
No one likes a hot mess, especially on New Year’s Eve. Nothing ruins an evening more than your overly-celebrating friend yakking on your cute new Manolos. But, it happens.
So, I’ve decided to put together a quick list of ways that you can avoid being “that girl” at whatever New Year’s festivities you decide to attend (though you SHOULD be going to McFadden’s).
What do I mean by “don’t be that girl”? Well, it’s simple really. Think about that girl that you see sometimes when you’re out at the bar with friends. The one who is .02 inches away from showing the world her nipple. The girl who’s dancing where there isn’t a dance floor, yelling, and by the end of the night, sitting on the floor in the ladies’ bathroom alternating between crying, throwing up and wondering where her shoes are.
Steps you can take to avoid being “that girl”:
Eat a good dinner – I get it, you don’t want to look fat and bloated in your new dress that you picked up just for tonight so that you could be the hottest girl in the place, but you have to eat. You won’t make it two long islands into the night before feeling pretty tipsy if your entire meal was a handful of green beans. (Except, let’s get real. You won’t call it quits. You’ll switch to beer and keep on drinking until you’re hugging the toilet, because you’re hardcore.) Instead, eat a damn turkey sandwich, or half a pizza. And you should probably get the fries, too.
If you pregame, do so in moderation – Everyone knows “that” girl, she’s the girl who pounds shots while getting ready to go out, because “the drinks at the club are so expensive!”. The guys won’t touch her for fear she’ll projectile vomit on their Vans and girls don’t want her losing her lunch on her Louis Vuittons. If you’re going to pre-game, limit it to one drink, one glass of wine, or one beer. You don’t want to be smashed before you even get to the bar.
Don’t mix while you mingle – While your tastes in alcoholic beverages may vary, it’s always best to just pick one thing and stick with it. Especially if the night is going to be long, and there’s going to be a lot of drinking going on. If you like rum, by all means, drink rum runners all night long. More of a beer girl? Sweet! Let the Bud Light flow! Just don’t decide half way through the night that you’re going to switch it up because you want something different. And always remember “beer before liquor, never sicker”.
For God’s sake, leave your shoes on – We’ve all seen that drunk girl wandering outside the club/bar barefoot, and carrying her shoes. This is not a good look. I know your shoes are uncomfortable, but it’s gross. Your feet are now coated in dirt and club juice and whatever that guy over there just spilled. I’m not a germophobe, but I’m pretty sure that if you do this, you’ll get rabies. I want to remind you that wearing 6-inch heels was a choice you made – while sober. Just because you are no longer sober that does not mean you have to become a train wreck with no shoes on. People laugh at you, they do, I’ve seen it.
Know your limit – So, you’re drunk. Good for you! What now? The party’s not over, and you don’t feel like going home. Hell no, you feel like dancing around with some of those moves you learned in your last Zumba class. Before you do, take a quick reading:
1. Stand still. Is the room spinning?
2. Can you feel your tongue? Or your teeth?
3. How many times have you flipped your hair in the last minute?
If you answered “Oh my goooooooooooo… How did you know? Are you in my head? How did you get in there! Where’s my beer? I can’t find my shoes!” Then face it, dear, you’re done for.
So, now you should be fully prepared to keep your wits about you while you’re enjoying the New Year’s celebration of your choosing.
Oh — and of course, don’t drink and drive. There are plenty of cab services in town, and some of them even offer free rides on New Year’s Eve. Even if you do become “that girl”, we still want you to be safe.