Bad Advertising: Fabric Fondling?

Now, as many of you know, I come from a very teeny tiny town in Northern Michigan, where, well, we're not always as up with the times as the rest of the world. However, this ad from the local paper caught my attention the other day, and I felt that I should share it with you all.

There's this sewing store up there. It's called The Happy Hooker.

Now, we all see where the name, in and of itself could be a problem, but this ad doesn't help their cause. Apparently, this Saturday, they're having a fabric fondling party. Fabric fondling? What the heck is that? It sounds like something you could be arrested for. In fact, I feel like if you get caught fabric fondling, you could probably end up on some sort of registry!

But, apparently it's something that the fine folks at The Happy Hooker do on the regular.